Venting inkongruent

[Liseli]

I'll never fit it or be part of something

All the years I have been alive. I never felt like I was important to anyone. I have found one person who cares about me, but only because they have lost others. I yearn for places where I never feel home. No matter in my actual home or sasu.
It doesn't mean I'm hated. Thankfully
But never really part of something. I'm the floater friend. The forgotten friend. The ghosted friend.
I am weird. I always stand out even if I don't want to.
I had this too many times. I already have a list full of people who left me hanging and only such little who kept me afloat.
I'm aware I am young, but is this really what life has to offer? The ones who kept me alive no longer speak to me. It hurts a lot.
I have no place I can call home.

I know it's no one's responsibility to include me. No one owes me anything. That's how the world works. But its a nice thought just to be part of something or feel like something with no doubt and no fear. No maybe no silence. Just a welcome

I don't know who I am anymore or what I desire

 

[EmpressDean]

I'll never fit it or be part of something

All the years I have been alive. I never felt like I was important to anyone. I have found one person who cares about me, but only because they have lost others. I yearn for places where I never feel home. No matter in my actual home or sasu.
It doesn't mean I'm hated. Thankfully
But never really part of something. I'm the floater friend. The forgotten friend. The ghosted friend.
I am weird. I always stand out even if I don't want to.
I had this too many times. I already have a list full of people who left me hanging and only such little who kept me afloat.
I'm aware I am young, but is this really what life has to offer? The ones who kept me alive no longer speak to me. It hurts a lot.
I have no place I can call home.

I know it's no one's responsibility to include me. No one owes me anything. That's how the world works. But its a nice thought just to be part of something or feel like something with no doubt and no fear. No maybe no silence. Just a welcome

I don't know who I am anymore or what I desire

I completely understand. In my culture being close to your cousins and growing up with them is common but none of them like me. Idk why. And what's worse is my dad helps them for years but he doesn't care if they treat me unkindly. I can't hold a job. Can't go to school. I'm stuck. And I don't see a way out. Being the floater person is exactly what I am. Only needed for labour or something else and then no one talks to me. I struggle hard to make friends. I try to talk to ppl, or message ppl to hang out. It's always a no

 

[Oreki]

Welcome to the club… I've never really felt like I belong anywhere. That feeling has been with me for as long as I can remember. I've always been a floater, never truly at home around people. I feel like I was never meant to be here, or that I'd have been better off in another country, in a culture that at least felt more like home

Sometimes I find myself longing for groups or places in other countries, cultures that feel closer to me than the one I was born into. And every time I feel that way, the same thought hits me: the world doesn't owe me anything. I've come to realise that I have to become self-sufficient, because I'm not important to anyone, and the world doesn't operate in my favour.

Sometimes it all feels devastating and overwhelming, and part of that is my own doing, I make myself unapproachable. I hate chasing after people, so when I feel like I don't fit in, I'd rather remove myself than force my way into something. I don't even feel half human anymore

But hopefully someday I'll be able to spit in the world's sleazy grin, or else..

So yeah, I understand what it feels like to never really be part of something. You're not alone in that
Now sharing that suddenly feels kind of cheesy, but whatever..