Venting I'm truly disgusting

[acsii_java]

I truly do not care about anything; I feel apathy towards everything. I've tried to get into hobbies such as sports and tech, but they never really interested me. Two days ago, my cat Shero died of old age, and I truly do not care. What if my mother died? Would I care then? Probably not. When my 'friends' told me something dark happened to them, I truly do not care. However, I put on an act in front of people as this confident, easy-to-talk-to person in real life to fit within social standards. Am I a sociopath? I don't get off on people hurting, I apologize for my poor English.

 

[Brown-Jacket Revy]

You're probably just burnt out.

When people become overwhelmed, they hit a breaking point, where they have to resign themselves to a state of stoicism to conserve their mental health.

This happens a lot with people who have been caregivers, but could happen in general when one is suffering depression and anxiety.

It's like you have to shut down and become numb as a means of survival.

It doesn't make you disgusting, just human.

 

[moonseeker]

We're not made the same, sometimes accidents happen in biology. This is why you have people who are depressed for no reason, people who are autistic, people who have varying mental and health issues. As long as you're not hurting anyone, you're not doing anything wrong. Pretending to care and trying to fit into society's standards is a good action on your part. Atleast you're trying, you're doing the best you can.

 

[lyfsoverrated]

god is disgusting. Don't be hard on yourself.

 

[LSDXMT]

I also feel apathetic and it has got much worse, so I do not really have any good advice because I clearly went wrong somewhere, probably genetics. I think some things make it worse, like most antidepressants, specifically SSRIs, tend to cause apathy and when i was on sertraline, I slept literally all day and did nothing, wasted a year of my life. It angers me that our brains are so flawed sometimes, don't actually do this but I always like to force that piece of shit organ to feel what I want TO feel through pharmacological manipulation or perhaps not feel anything by dying. Not saying you should do this, but its just how I view this stupid brain of mine, also I think I am extremely autistic, so maybe most of what I just typed sounds so stupid probably, so sorry if thats the case, but anyway I wish you luck.

 

[acsii_java]

I also feel apathetic and it has got much worse, so I do not really have any good advice because I clearly went wrong somewhere, probably genetics. I think some things make it worse, like most antidepressants, specifically SSRIs, tend to cause apathy and when i was on sertraline, I slept literally all day and did nothing, wasted a year of my life. It angers me that our brains are so flawed sometimes, don't actually do this but I always like to force that piece of shit organ to feel what I want TO feel through pharmacological manipulation or perhaps not feel anything by dying. Not saying you should do this, but its just how I view this stupid brain of mine, also I think I am extremely autistic, so maybe most of what I just typed sounds so stupid probably, so sorry if thats the case, but anyway I wish you luck.

It's reassuring to know that someone out there shares a similar experience to mine. Maybe we're not as alone as we often feel. We both spent an incredible amount of time living through repetitive days, to the extent that time seemed to slip away from us. It seems like your situation might be even more challenging than mine. I genuinely wish you the best of luck, user ( I'm quite autistic myself lmao )

 

[wagner2029]

I truly do not care about anything; I feel apathy towards everything. I've tried to get into hobbies such as sports and tech, but they never really interested me. Two days ago, my cat Shero died of old age, and I truly do not care. What if my mother died? Would I care then? Probably not. When my 'friends' told me something dark happened to them, I truly do not care. However, I put on an act in front of people as this confident, easy-to-talk-to person in real life to fit within social standards. Am I a sociopath? I don't get off on people hurting, I apologize for my poor English.

maybe you have asperger syndrome or autism.
there are several levels of autism, the milder ones are harder to detect. anthony hopkins was diagnosed with asperger's when he was over 70 years old.
I feel that too, lately it's been more difficult, I can't even watch movies, everything is boring.