Venting Im so fucking lonely

[lostmilo]

My screen time is through the roof and most of the time spent on my phone is just in desperation hoping that somebody texts me to ask how im doing or constantly scrolling on this forum looking for consolidation. It's so pathetic and desperate and it makes no sense because I'm not a very social person and yet I crave validation from random people. Ironically at the same time I push my family away but tbf every time I've tried talking to them it's only made me even more suicidal. I just want one person to notice. It may be "attention seeking" but so be it. All this "suicide prevention" bullshit means nothing if you actively ignore the signs of sucidality.
And it's not like I hide how suicidal I am it's just that people choose to ignore it because it makes them comfortable

 

[AtheistCDsissy]

 

[A Dream of a Dream]

It's not attention seeking, it's totally human. I am often lonely too. Sending you hugs

 

[Valhala]

I'm terribly lonely and that makes me suicidal, but, paradoxically, the company of other people makes me even more suicidal. Maybe it's because I miss her, my only and greatest love, and without her I'm condemned to that terrible feeling of loneliness. I don't like people , I don't miss company - I only miss her and the love I would get from her.