Venting I worried my mom is catching on to my suicide plans

[Gstreater]

Out of nowhere she brought up that she's not sure what she would do without me and that she loves me, stuff like that. No one else has really picked up on it or if they have they've kept it to themselves. I'm just worried she's catching on to my depressive spiral. She hasn't seen any of my cuts or anything but I'm hoping she doesn't keep a closer eye on me so I don't get any to the ward or she does something stupid to try and stop me from killing myself. I'm just wondering how I can hide it better.

 

[straw.berryy729]

I relate a lot to this. I often worry that my mom will find out how bad things are really going for me and that she will find out that I have plans in case I ever attempt again. I still live with my parents and I have things hidden in my room that if my mom were to find she would take away from me and immediately become very worried about me. I understand why my mom would react like this, but the possibility that my suicide method will be taken away from me honestly really terrifies me.