I want to die but can't because the SI is strong. I am in a bad situation which I could possibly escape with a huge amount of hard work. But the odds are really stacked against me, and I'm really tired of working and trying. I have tried hard all my life and it hasn't done anything. Even if I succeed, I might lose a lot of things and that success might not be worth the price I have to pay.
So I want to die, but I'm scared of death. I think my fear of death might subside if I accept that there is no point in living.
But I still have unrealistic hopes, like "maybe everything will magically work out and I will be able to achieve my dreams." I wish I could just give up and accept that those hopes will never come true, so that I lose my fear of death and can die. Instead I'm left struggling and suffering day to day with no end in sight. There is a term I heard which is "hope torture." It describes an unrealistic hope that people have, and it is torture because the hope will never come true. My life is basically hope torture. Literal torture.
I want to die, but am struggling to do so because I'm too much of a pussy. I can't live either because life is too hard. So there's no way out and I'm just forced to suffer. Like what the hell.
Human psychology fucking sucks. I hate life. fuck all this dumb shit. life is such a fucking pain. I don't know why the hell I was chosen to be in this shit.
So I want to die, but I'm scared of death. I think my fear of death might subside if I accept that there is no point in living.
But I still have unrealistic hopes, like "maybe everything will magically work out and I will be able to achieve my dreams." I wish I could just give up and accept that those hopes will never come true, so that I lose my fear of death and can die. Instead I'm left struggling and suffering day to day with no end in sight. There is a term I heard which is "hope torture." It describes an unrealistic hope that people have, and it is torture because the hope will never come true. My life is basically hope torture. Literal torture.
I want to die, but am struggling to do so because I'm too much of a pussy. I can't live either because life is too hard. So there's no way out and I'm just forced to suffer. Like what the hell.
Human psychology fucking sucks. I hate life. fuck all this dumb shit. life is such a fucking pain. I don't know why the hell I was chosen to be in this shit.
