Venting I wish I could say goodbye

[emptyjokes]

Sometimes I wish I could just tell the people in my life that I'm going to be leaving soon without causing so much pain or jeopardizing my plan. I'm hanging on for as long as I can to set things up to go smoothly after I'm gone (well thought out note, sizable collections of pictures and videos, and a will) but I keep getting strong urges to skip SN and my whole delicate plan and just shoot myself right there in my bedroom. Obviously that's a sub-par way to go, but the suffering of sticking around feels so profoundly unbearable some days.

Do you all have these kinds of thoughts? If so, how do you navigate them?

 

[meetapple]

I would probably think that if I have survived this long than a little extra wait to get things right isn't so awful.

 

[FuneralCry]

I do wish that we lived in a world where suicide is not so stigmatised and our right to die is respected, and then we could be open about our plans to leave this world. I do think that if those left behind knew in advance what was about to happen, it would make it more bearable for them.

I understand being desperate to leave this world and I'm sorry that you suffer so unbearably. Living really is so painful and I know that it is hard to carry on when all you want is to leave. I wish you relief from suffering in whatever you decide to do.