I want to do it so badly but I don't want to make other people sad

[takihorse]

I don't even like my family that much (I experienced abuse growing up and my family is still pretty dysfunctional today) and I have very few friends. I hate being alive so much, all I think about all day is how much I want to die. I've researched methods and I know where I would get the materials and how I would do my chosen method. but the thought of my parents having to find out that I killed myself and my friends having to find out or just guess what happened to me makes me feel so guilty that i dont do it. But I want to kill myself so badly.

 

[starrypandabear]

I know how you feel, maybe not exactly but imaging my mom and brother's reaction makes me feel terrible, even if my relationship to her is very tumultuous. It is so hard to hold on though, I hope you will find peace, whichever path you go.

 

[iveseenfootage]

The way I see it is our lives are ours alone, and the decision to live/die should be ours alone. Makes me feel a little better about it lol.