Venting I started to SH

[princeseadove]

I tried to CTB, but failed, and after the 6th attempt I decided to just stop. I feel better strangely enough, especially after I talked to someone. But nothing has changed, I am still miserable, and very unloveable, and very much ill, I started to SH. I don't think I'll be alive for very long, I'm just here until I can find a proper way where/when I can. I don't have any razors, so I did jist burn myself. Lately I have started to have delusions about axing myself. Like, a clone of me or whatever. I saw a video like it and I can't help but imagine me in thag spot. Or, "me"s. Night terrors are just wonderful too combined with the violent hallucinations/delusions!

 

[Jade10666]

I tried to CTB, but failed, and after the 6th attempt I decided to just stop. I feel better strangely enough, especially after I talked to someone. But nothing has changed, I am still miserable, and very unloveable, and very much ill, I started to SH. I don't think I'll be alive for very long, I'm just here until I can find a proper way where/when I can. I don't have any razors, so I did jist burn myself. Lately I have started to have delusions about axing myself. Like, a clone of me or whatever. I saw a video like it and I can't help but imagine me in thag spot. Or, "me"s. Night terrors are just wonderful too combined with the violent hallucinations/delusions!

What type of methods did you try for yuour attempts? Did they fail because of SI, or something else?

 

[Forveleth]

I am sorry that things have come to this for you. Never had night terrors but I have known some people who did and they sound aweful.

Fellow SH'er here. I do not know much about burning for SH but make sure to do proper aftercare to avoid infections.

 

[manicstreetbeeper]

i self harm as well; burning with my lighter or scratching with my keys. i prefer the latter. i'm sorry you're going through this too.

 

[IMAFRAIDDAVE]

I understand, I recently relapsed after 2 months clean. Feeling trapped is a terrible feeling, I wish people who are against suicide would understand that. I hope your life starts to get better or you find a way out of it.

 

[princeseadove]

What type of methods did you try for yuour attempts? Did they fail because of SI, or something else?

They were all partial suspension, aside form one which was pills. I don't know, I tried to do it on the doorknob and I just wouldnt black out

I am sorry that things have come to this for you. Never had night terrors but I have known some people who did and they sound aweful.

Fellow SH'er here. I do not know much about burning for SH but make sure to do proper aftercare to avoid infections.

Thank you! It wasn't a whole lot, so I don't think theyll be any infections? I'm going to try and get a safer route soon enough!

i self harm as well; burning with my lighter or scratching with my keys. i prefer the latter. i'm sorry you're going through this too.

Thank you, and I'm sorry as well, having to hurt like that always sucks

I understand, I recently relapsed after 2 months clean. Feeling trapped is a terrible feeling, I wish people who are against suicide would understand that. I hope your life starts to get better or you find a way out of it.

Thank you thank you, I hope so too :( I don't mind either choice, as long as I get my rest