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D

DeadHead

Belief is the enemy of knowledge
Aug 20, 2023
292
Hi All,

Firstly, thank you to admin for giving us this space.

Secondly I had an account here years ago which I deleted. I think self-deletion results in an auto ban, because I have been struggling for over a month to make a new account and kept being blocked/rejected. As a result I'm not sure whether I can no only use this forum via my friend's internet - today is the last day I have access. I will be on for a couple of hours from now, but if you don't hear from me again, that's why.
This is also why I've skipped the intro part and want to get straight to the important stuff in case I only have limited access here.

I am in the UK and managed to get N from A, the main supplier when I was on this board a few years ago. Since coming back here I see much has changed, I have no idea what happened to A.

My N came through with no problems, it was delivered by courier within weeks of ordering. I paid around £700 for 2 bottles, 200ml total (100ml per bottle). That is the minimum dose you need (each bottle is 6.5). IMPORTANT: this the veterinary solution for injection, it is not the same product for oral ingestion used in the clinics. I ruined one bottle by accident so now only have 1 left, not enough for self-deliverance BUT, I did a taste test (several times) and I can tell you there is NO WAY I could ever drink 2 bottles, let alone 1 mouthful without vomiting. You then risk choking on your vomit in a drowsy state. Not what I want. I have never in my life tasted anything so foul, I do not have words to describe it. A very strong industrial kind of taste.

When my N arrived, I cried with relief, but that soon passed when I realised I could never drink the stuff. So I want to caution people about thinking N is the holy grail. At the same time, I want to tell you that if you find a good seller like A, the stuff gets through fine. I can't divulge the tactic used, but it is very clever and there is no reason it would be intercepted and tested by the authorities.

SN
Ordered with no problems, it came through fine. I think I paid around £20 for 2 containers. The vendor still operates, so no idea why people are having problems. Again, for me personally, this is not going to work. It is misleading to make blanket statements claiming any damage is reversible. I personally have a large brain tumour that is already encasing my carotid artery by over 50%. It's restricting the flow of oxygenated blood, causing me a world of side effects. If I were to experience a further reduction in oxygen by taking sn (sorry I don't know the right terms to explain all this), I could have a seizure, or end up with brain damage if the attempt failed.

I have suffered enough and am looking for a way out that will not cause me distress in my final moments, I don't want to be terrified and in distress.
Everyone is different with different medical problems, so the effects of any self-deliverance method could affect you in different ways. This is also why I can't practice blocking my carotid arteries with a view to hanging.

Happy to answer questions, obviously cannot send/receive PMs. I apologise in advance if I have transgressed any rules here with my first post, in a hurry to get this info out in case I can't access the site again after today.
 
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Captive_Mind515

Captive_Mind515

King or street sweeper, dance with grim reaper!
Jul 18, 2023
433
Thanks for the info.

Sorry about your diagnoses.
 
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W

withouthope

Member
Jun 25, 2023
67
If I were to obtain N I would try to inject it using an IV. There are a lot of tutorials on YouTube.

You might consider the rebreather. The third edition was recently released and there's a thread devoted to it.
 
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befree

befree

Time to do more enjoyable things _____Goodbye_____
Mar 22, 2022
2,587
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withouthope

Member
Jun 25, 2023
67
Regarding buying N, there was a seller called D for quite a while but packages started being intercepted by customs and buyers were receiving wellness checks and having their N confiscated. And he disappeared shortly after. There is no reputable source at the moment.
 
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Kerrtu

Kerrtu

Komeetta ♊︎
May 8, 2023
474
I also had 2 bottles of N from A, back around 2015/16 - those amber tinted bottles with the blue and white labels and rubber stoppers, for injection. I agree - the taste was horrid. Metallic and super strong. I opened one bottle to taste test and I was blown away.

That said, I did end up consuming both bottles over time, as I had a broken neck and was going through divorce - I didn't care what happened to me, I just wanted relief. One night I dosed using one of those small plastic medicine cups and went downstairs to have a cigarette. Well, it had me so drowsy, I thought I put the cigarette out fully before throwing it in the trash but it wasn't out, and the entire garbage can and contents caught fire. I was so out of it, I didn't realize the basement filling with smoke.

My father came running down screaming "SMOKE!" and took the flaming garbage can upstairs, was able to put it out. I almost burned the damn house down.

Cue the Talking Heads Burning Down The House

Jokes aside, it was pretty scary. Every time I dosed after, I made sure I was in bed and absolutely didn't smoke after consuming. I don't regret buying the N, or using it as I did with the exception of the fire. The N gave me many nights of extremely deep sleep. But as you said and I will reiterate - the taste is wretched.

I still have SN (99.6% reagent grade 🐺) and it remains factory sealed. I'll be going with that when my time comes.

I am very sorry to hear of your condition @DeadHead - I imagine you must be suffering and I sincerely hope you find relief.
 
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D

DeadHead

Belief is the enemy of knowledge
Aug 20, 2023
292
I also had 2 bottles of N from A, back around 2015/16 - those amber tinted bottles with the blue and white labels and rubber stoppers, for injection. I agree - the taste was horrid. Metallic and super strong. I opened one bottle to taste test and I was blown away.

That said, I did end up consuming both bottles over time, as I had a broken neck and was going through divorce - I didn't care what happened to me, I just wanted relief. One night I dosed using one of those small plastic medicine cups and went downstairs to have a cigarette. Well, it had me so drowsy, I thought I put the cigarette out fully before throwing it in the trash but it wasn't out, and the entire garbage can and contents caught fire. I was so out of it, I didn't realize the basement filling with smoke.

My father came running down screaming "SMOKE!" and took the flaming garbage can upstairs, was able to put it out. I almost burned the damn house down.

Cue the Talking Heads Burning Down The House

Jokes aside, it was pretty scary. Every time I dosed after, I made sure I was in bed and absolutely didn't smoke after consuming. I don't regret buying the N, or using it as I did with the exception of the fire. The N gave me many nights of extremely deep sleep. But as you said and I will reiterate - the taste is wretched.

I still have SN (99.6% reagent grade 🐺) and it remains factory sealed. I'll be going with that when my time comes.

I am very sorry to hear of your condition @DeadHead - I imagine you must be suffering and I sincerely hope you find relief.
Thank you. What happened to A? That man was a lifesaver and I found him to be humble and kind. Got the idea he was an older man and not very well himself.

How many ml do you have left? I was wondering whether I could syringe the 100ml I have left into gelatin capsules, but I'm not sure that's practical. In any case I only have 1 bottle left so would need to combine it with another method.

I'm glad you didn't burn the house down!
For the life of me I just cannot imagine anyone being able to drink 2 bottles of that stuff.

I tested mine with a home testing kit, it was positive for barbiturates.
As months roll by I always find myself becoming more desperate to leave this hellish realm and ask myself: did it really taste that bad?
Then I do another taste test and am surprised all over again at how utterly FOUL it is.

I stupidly let air into the bottle through the syringe the last time I did a taste test so assume that bottle is useless. The expiry date was roundabout now, but I'm sure the good bottle is still just as potent.
 
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Kerrtu

Kerrtu

Komeetta ♊︎
May 8, 2023
474
Thank you. What happened to A? That man was a lifesaver and I found him to be humble and kind. Got the idea he was an older man and not very well himself.

How many ml do you have left? I was wondering whether I could syringe the 100ml I have left into gelatin capsules, but I'm not sure that's practical. In any case I only have 1 bottle left so would need to combine it with another method.

I'm glad you didn't burn the house down!
For the life of me I just cannot imagine anyone being able to drink 2 bottles of that stuff.

I tested mine with a home testing kit, it was positive for barbiturates.
As months roll by I always find myself becoming more desperate to leave this hellish realm and ask myself: did it really taste that bad?
Then I do another taste test and am surprised all over again at how utterly FOUL it is.

I stupidly let air into the bottle through the syringe the last time I did a taste test so assume that bottle is useless. The expiry date was roundabout now, but I'm sure the good bottle is still just as potent.

It's a good question - I don't know what happened with A though our interactions (via proton mail at the time) were always very nice - polite, cordial. A was thoughtful and came through. Prior to ordering from A, I had been scammed out of $650 from a different supposed source so by the time I ordered with A, I was just hoping the package would make it to me and be legit. A was a solid, genuinely good supplier. Kind and humble, I agree. I hope he's doing well.

The 2 bottles I consumed over a period of months. I will not forget the taste and looking back, I don't know how I didn't vomit. Not once did I vomit. Well, I did have a lot of other medications I was on at the time due to the injury, and I had strong antiemetics as I had a lot of nausea from the skull injury aspect of the broken neck.

When it comes to injecting, it can get dicey. I wouldn't try the gelatin capsules though in theory, it would be amazing if you were able to get that to work. I was thinking of straight up injecting and if you were to do that, be very careful in making sure you don't inject air into your veins. I'm sure you know that anyway, I just wanted to say it to be sure - I don't want you suffering further.

If you let air into the bottle it doesn't mean the N is trash - definitely still useable. And the expiration dates are very flexible with N - it's so damn strong, I estimate the bottles are good for 3 years at least after the date on the bottles. I would remove the rubber stoppers every time I consumed so air did get in but it had no negative effect on the potency and this was months of opening and resealing with the rubber stoppers.

Thank you for your kind words regarding the near house fire - I'm glad I didn't burn it down, too. I look back in near disbelief at how close it was to being a total disaster.

One more bit about the taste, as it is so metallic and bitter (probably the most bitter thing I've ever consumed) - I wonder if having a wedge of lemon on hand after drinking would help at all. Like taking a shot basically and sucking the lemon immediately after?

If you've got 1 full bottle left - hell, even half a bottle, that would be enough.

My best thoughts to you and again, wishing you relief.
 
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befree

befree

Time to do more enjoyable things _____Goodbye_____
Mar 22, 2022
2,587
What heppend to N and A ? ... Members posted datails about both sources in the forum: photos of the N bottles with the label, details about the customs declaration, info about paypent and shipping...etc. Same with SN. Authorities are watching this forum. Even to mention a country where there is a source is wrong.
 
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S

Secrets1

Specialist
Nov 18, 2019
355
Has anyone tried mixing to mask the taste of N? Coating your tongue, especially the very back and sides which are more sensitive to bitter or sour tastes with almond butter or mixing it with something sweet like a small amount of apple juice?

Have any of you tried the drug cleansing drinks to get weed out of your system? The one I had tasted like literal shit sewage. Still got it down, no puke. I also pledged a fraternity where we drank all sorts of shit during pledging, it's possible that makes a difference in perspective and lack of avoidance here.

Personally a minute or two of discomfort could never compare to a lifetime of pain & i don't see what's better than N. Can't wait to get mine picking it up soon. It's been away from me for 2 years.
I've also read that alcohol can cancel out N but thats always sounded skeptical. They are both nervous system depressants. Word around the web is taking alcohol after N makes it more potent. I don't understand why spending a day getting drunk, then taking some N before passing out wouldn't work. It's combining strong depressants. Alcohol poisoning on steroids.
 
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pthnrdnojvsc

pthnrdnojvsc

Extreme Pain is much worse than people know
Aug 12, 2019
2,159
Hi All,

Firstly, thank you to admin for giving us this space.

Secondly I had an account here years ago which I deleted. I think self-deletion results in an auto ban, because I have been struggling for over a month to make a new account and kept being blocked/rejected. As a result I'm not sure whether I can no only use this forum via my friend's internet - today is the last day I have access. I will be on for a couple of hours from now, but if you don't hear from me again, that's why.
This is also why I've skipped the intro part and want to get straight to the important stuff in case I only have limited access here.

I am in the UK and managed to get N from A, the main supplier when I was on this board a few years ago. Since coming back here I see much has changed, I have no idea what happened to A.

My N came through with no problems, it was delivered by courier within weeks of ordering. I paid around £700 for 2 bottles, 200ml total (100ml per bottle). That is the minimum dose you need (each bottle is 6.5). IMPORTANT: this the veterinary solution for injection, it is not the same product for oral ingestion used in the clinics. I ruined one bottle by accident so now only have 1 left, not enough for self-deliverance BUT, I did a taste test (several times) and I can tell you there is NO WAY I could ever drink 2 bottles, let alone 1 mouthful without vomiting. You then risk choking on your vomit in a drowsy state. Not what I want. I have never in my life tasted anything so foul, I do not have words to describe it. A very strong industrial kind of taste.

When my N arrived, I cried with relief, but that soon passed when I realised I could never drink the stuff. So I want to caution people about thinking N is the holy grail. At the same time, I want to tell you that if you find a good seller like A, the stuff gets through fine. I can't divulge the tactic used, but it is very clever and there is no reason it would be intercepted and tested by the authorities.

SN
Ordered with no problems, it came through fine. I think I paid around £20 for 2 containers. The vendor still operates, so no idea why people are having problems. Again, for me personally, this is not going to work. It is misleading to make blanket statements claiming any damage is reversible. I personally have a large brain tumour that is already encasing my carotid artery by over 50%. It's restricting the flow of oxygenated blood, causing me a world of side effects. If I were to experience a further reduction in oxygen by taking sn (sorry I don't know the right terms to explain all this), I could have a seizure, or end up with brain damage if the attempt failed.

I have suffered enough and am looking for a way out that will not cause me distress in my final moments, I don't want to be terrified and in distress.
Everyone is different with different medical problems, so the effects of any self-deliverance method could affect you in different ways. This is also why I can't practice blocking my carotid arteries with a view to hanging.

Happy to answer questions, obviously cannot send/receive PMs. I apologise in advance if I have transgressed any rules here with my first post, in a hurry to get this info out in case I can't access the site again after today.
Having similar problems.
 
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アホペンギン

アホペンギン

Jul 10, 2023
2,202
I'm glad you managed to acquire 2 of the things labled as some of the best methods for ctb. You're lucky to have managed to get both of them. The N seems expensive to me but sellers will make prices very high because they technically have a monopoly over N. The SN's price was more reasonable. Now, you're right when you said in the title how neither of these 2 methods are the holy grail. Theres still a chance of failure if done incorrectly by not following the recommended regimens or because of external uncontrollable factors.
 
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mrscat

mrscat

Member
May 25, 2018
63
Hi All,

Firstly, thank you to admin for giving us this space.

Secondly I had an account here years ago which I deleted. I think self-deletion results in an auto ban, because I have been struggling for over a month to make a new account and kept being blocked/rejected. As a result I'm not sure whether I can no only use this forum via my friend's internet - today is the last day I have access. I will be on for a couple of hours from now, but if you don't hear from me again, that's why.
This is also why I've skipped the intro part and want to get straight to the important stuff in case I only have limited access here.

I am in the UK and managed to get N from A, the main supplier when I was on this board a few years ago. Since coming back here I see much has changed, I have no idea what happened to A.

My N came through with no problems, it was delivered by courier within weeks of ordering. I paid around £700 for 2 bottles, 200ml total (100ml per bottle). That is the minimum dose you need (each bottle is 6.5). IMPORTANT: this the veterinary solution for injection, it is not the same product for oral ingestion used in the clinics. I ruined one bottle by accident so now only have 1 left, not enough for self-deliverance BUT, I did a taste test (several times) and I can tell you there is NO WAY I could ever drink 2 bottles, let alone 1 mouthful without vomiting. You then risk choking on your vomit in a drowsy state. Not what I want. I have never in my life tasted anything so foul, I do not have words to describe it. A very strong industrial kind of taste.

When my N arrived, I cried with relief, but that soon passed when I realised I could never drink the stuff. So I want to caution people about thinking N is the holy grail. At the same time, I want to tell you that if you find a good seller like A, the stuff gets through fine. I can't divulge the tactic used, but it is very clever and there is no reason it would be intercepted and tested by the authorities.

SN
Ordered with no problems, it came through fine. I think I paid around £20 for 2 containers. The vendor still operates, so no idea why people are having problems. Again, for me personally, this is not going to work. It is misleading to make blanket statements claiming any damage is reversible. I personally have a large brain tumour that is already encasing my carotid artery by over 50%. It's restricting the flow of oxygenated blood, causing me a world of side effects. If I were to experience a further reduction in oxygen by taking sn (sorry I don't know the right terms to explain all this), I could have a seizure, or end up with brain damage if the attempt failed.

I have suffered enough and am looking for a way out that will not cause me distress in my final moments, I don't want to be terrified and in distress.
Everyone is different with different medical problems, so the effects of any self-deliverance method could affect you in different ways. This is also why I can't practice blocking my carotid arteries with a view to hanging.

Happy to answer questions, obviously cannot send/receive PMs. I apologise in advance if I have transgressed any rules here with my first post, in a hurry to get this info out in case I can't access the site again after today.
I'm sorry for all you are going trough with your illness..I hope you find your peace.
I also had my two bottles from AV. I got them in December 2017, before Christmas. When I read your post it brought me memories about that time, the moment I got them I was so excited and brought me into tears. He was a nice person, kind and reliable. I even remember that I used money gram at that time and i had some issue with the payment and A was so nice and sent me the bottles without confirming the transaction.. I got them without problems.
I read in old reddid post years ago, that he maybe was caught by cops, but being honest I don't know... the thing is that now there is not reliable source of N vendor. In some countries in South America or Mexico you possible can get it.
I'm completely agree with you about the 200 ml is a lot to drink and the taste is awful. Now, if I have some luck, I am trying to get N in the euthanasia form, the higher concentration that I will only need 50 ml bottle.
Thanks for posting!
I wish you the best in your journey!
 
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moggedtodeath

moggedtodeath

Member
Nov 5, 2022
89
Where did you source your SN, if you don't mind me asking? Can you send me a PM?
 
D

DeadHead

Belief is the enemy of knowledge
Aug 20, 2023
292
I'm sorry for all you are going trough with your illness..I hope you find your peace.
I also had my two bottles from AV. I got them in December 2017, before Christmas. When I read your post it brought me memories about that time, the moment I got them I was so excited and brought me into tears. He was a nice person, kind and reliable. I even remember that I used money gram at that time and i had some issue with the payment and A was so nice and sent me the bottles without confirming the transaction.. I got them without problems.
I read in old reddid post years ago, that he maybe was caught by cops, but being honest I don't know... the thing is that now there is not reliable source of N vendor. In some countries in South America or Mexico you possible can get it.
I'm completely agree with you about the 200 ml is a lot to drink and the taste is awful. Now, if I have some luck, I am trying to get N in the euthanasia form, the higher concentration that I will only need 50 ml bottle.
Thanks for posting!
I wish you the best in your journey!
I really hope he wasn't caught. "Funny" story, my delivery was accidentally routed to another address in another city with the same street name. I freaked out as you can imagine, but the couriers realised their mistake in time so sent it to me after all. Nerve-wrecking times! Unfortunately flying has become a problem for me, it causes raised intracranial pressure, so I am no longer able to fly to another country to try and purchase the actual euthanasia formula for humans. A 50ml bottle is far more feasible and realistic.
 
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ocklepold

ocklepold

Member
Jul 24, 2021
38
I paid around £700 for 2 bottles, 200ml total (100ml per bottle). That is the minimum dose you need (each bottle is 6.5).

I'd like to clarify something. On page 409 of the Peaceful Pill eHandbook (April 2022 version, downloaded from the Suicide Resources Compilation pinned thread), it states:

"In the vast majority of cases, one bottle (100mL @ 60mg / mL) of veterinary Nembutal will always be satisfactory and lead to a peaceful death, usually in ~1 - 2 hours." (there is a similar passage on page 299)

So based on that I don't think one needs to drink 200mL. One bottle will be enough.

I would really like to hear opinions on this, particularly if I have misunderstood and am wrong.
 
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D

DeadHead

Belief is the enemy of knowledge
Aug 20, 2023
292
It's a good question - I don't know what happened with A though our interactions (via proton mail at the time) were always very nice - polite, cordial. A was thoughtful and came through. Prior to ordering from A, I had been scammed out of $650 from a different supposed source so by the time I ordered with A, I was just hoping the package would make it to me and be legit. A was a solid, genuinely good supplier. Kind and humble, I agree. I hope he's doing well.

The 2 bottles I consumed over a period of months. I will not forget the taste and looking back, I don't know how I didn't vomit. Not once did I vomit. Well, I did have a lot of other medications I was on at the time due to the injury, and I had strong antiemetics as I had a lot of nausea from the skull injury aspect of the broken neck.

When it comes to injecting, it can get dicey. I wouldn't try the gelatin capsules though in theory, it would be amazing if you were able to get that to work. I was thinking of straight up injecting and if you were to do that, be very careful in making sure you don't inject air into your veins. I'm sure you know that anyway, I just wanted to say it to be sure - I don't want you suffering further.

If you let air into the bottle it doesn't mean the N is trash - definitely still useable. And the expiration dates are very flexible with N - it's so damn strong, I estimate the bottles are good for 3 years at least after the date on the bottles. I would remove the rubber stoppers every time I consumed so air did get in but it had no negative effect on the potency and this was months of opening and resealing with the rubber stoppers.

Thank you for your kind words regarding the near house fire - I'm glad I didn't burn it down, too. I look back in near disbelief at how close it was to being a total disaster.

One more bit about the taste, as it is so metallic and bitter (probably the most bitter thing I've ever consumed) - I wonder if having a wedge of lemon on hand after drinking would help at all. Like taking a shot basically and sucking the lemon immediately after?

If you've got 1 full bottle left - hell, even half a bottle, that would be enough.

My best thoughts to you and again, wishing you relief.
I can't take chances, there was a website (forget the name) where they warned about the risk of failures with just one bottle. I tried rinsing my mouth with mouthwash and even that didn't help.
I'd like to clarify something. On page 409 of the Peaceful Pill eHandbook (April 2022 version, downloaded from the Suicide Resources Compilation pinned thread), it states:

"In the vast majority of cases, one bottle (100mL @ 60mg / mL) of veterinary Nembutal will always be satisfactory and lead to a peaceful death, usually in ~1 - 2 hours." (there is a similar passage on page 299)

So based on that I don't think one needs to drink 200mL. One bottle will be enough.

I would really like to hear opinions on this, particularly if I have misunderstood and am wrong.
Based on several years of research, I'm not confident about that and for me personally I need to be 100 percent confident. I don't want to end up in a worse position than I am. In any case, I personally would not even get one mouthful down. Maybe people who drink alcohol (I dont) and are used to very strong tastes would succeed. A. told me each bottle of 100g was the equivalent of 6.5.
If I were to obtain N I would try to inject it using an IV. There are a lot of tutorials on YouTube.

You might consider the rebreather. The third edition was recently released and there's a thread devoted to it.
Yes I'm looking I to gas now but where I am suppliers will only ship to a trade address.
 
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mrscat

mrscat

Member
May 25, 2018
63
I really hope he wasn't caught. "Funny" story, my delivery was accidentally routed to another address in another city with the same street name. I freaked out as you can imagine, but the couriers realised their mistake in time so sent it to me after all. Nerve-wrecking times! Unfortunately flying has become a problem for me, it causes raised intracranial pressure, so I am no longer able to fly to another country to try and purchase the actual euthanasia formula for humans. A 50ml bottle is far more feasible and realistic.
Lucky, you still got it without problems at that time.
I am sorry ...it must be really bad all this.. hopefully you will find a way that works for you.
Yes, the 50 ml it is used for euthanasia in animals. The 100 ml bottles are for anesthesia but some vets stil use it for euthanasia at least here in the country I am now. It has a higher concentration of sodium penthobarbital.
 
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C

chopan

Member
May 8, 2020
53
One idea to help to swallow N is to put an ice cube int your mouth for a while in order to numb your sense of taste before drinking N. I haven't tried this myself I am just sharing an idea.
 
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Bobert_Beniro

Bobert_Beniro

Life sucks and then you die.
Mar 14, 2023
270
I assumed that N would taste bitter, but so bad ... SN, by the way, is also disgusting, the worst taste I have ever tried, both sour and incredibly salty. Apparently Philip Nitschke should add a new factor to the table of methods - taste :) Maybe use opiates? Fentanyl should become an analogue of the grail
 
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S

Secrets1

Specialist
Nov 18, 2019
355
2 bottles of N is liquid equivalent of 6.5 shots. I'd line up 3 double shots, have a lime out and Bloody Mary to chase it with. Will it be a blast? Nope but it's the best option afaik. If you fail there aren't lingering OD effects like with SN or opiates. You just sleep for a few days from all accounts I've read and researched, which I put a lot of fkn time into lol.
 
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I

Interloper

Jul 23, 2021
687
I'd like to clarify something. On page 409 of the Peaceful Pill eHandbook (April 2022 version, downloaded from the Suicide Resources Compilation pinned thread), it states:

"In the vast majority of cases, one bottle (100mL @ 60mg / mL) of veterinary Nembutal will always be satisfactory and lead to a peaceful death, usually in ~1 - 2 hours." (there is a similar passage on page 299)

So based on that I don't think one needs to drink 200mL. One bottle will be enough.

I would really like to hear opinions on this, particularly if I have misunderstood and am wrong.
I have searched far and wide over the past year and have not found anyone that failed with just 1 bottle, that hadn't had medical intervention. People have died from as little as 1-2g, of course everyone's body is unique so, I understand people wanting to be "sure" and go for the 2 bottles. The only risk here is it taking longer and thus being at risk of being found.
 
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cscott

cscott

Awaiting for life’s end ☠️
Jun 22, 2023
250
I also had 2 bottles of N from A, back around 2015/16 - those amber tinted bottles with the blue and white labels and rubber stoppers, for injection. I agree - the taste was horrid. Metallic and super strong. I opened one bottle to taste test and I was blown away.

That said, I did end up consuming both bottles over time, as I had a broken neck and was going through divorce - I didn't care what happened to me, I just wanted relief. One night I dosed using one of those small plastic medicine cups and went downstairs to have a cigarette. Well, it had me so drowsy, I thought I put the cigarette out fully before throwing it in the trash but it wasn't out, and the entire garbage can and contents caught fire. I was so out of it, I didn't realize the basement filling with smoke.

My father came running down screaming "SMOKE!" and took the flaming garbage can upstairs, was able to put it out. I almost burned the damn house down.

Cue the Talking Heads Burning Down The House

Jokes aside, it was pretty scary. Every time I dosed after, I made sure I was in bed and absolutely didn't smoke after consuming. I don't regret buying the N, or using it as I did with the exception of the fire. The N gave me many nights of extremely deep sleep. But as you said and I will reiterate - the taste is wretched.

I still have SN (99.6% reagent grade 🐺) and it remains factory sealed. I'll be going with that when my time comes.

I am very sorry to hear of your condition @DeadHead - I imagine you must be suffering and I sincerely hope you find relief.
Hi, sorry so did u consume them to just help with sleep and healing etc cause you're still here so I'm assuming you didn't consume them to die ?
 
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pthnrdnojvsc

pthnrdnojvsc

Extreme Pain is much worse than people know
Aug 12, 2019
2,159
I can't take chances, there was a website (forget the name) where they warned about the risk of failures with just one bottle. I tried rinsing my mouth with mouthwash and even that didn't help.

Based on several years of research, I'm not confident about that and for me personally I need to be 100 percent confident. I don't want to end up in a worse position than I am. In any case, I personally would not even get one mouthful down. Maybe people who drink alcohol (I dont) and are used to very strong tastes would succeed. A. told me each bottle of 100g was the equivalent of 6.5.

Yes I'm looking I to gas now but where I am suppliers will only ship to a trade address.
what did they say were the risk of failure with one bottle of N ?
 
R

roguetrader

Experienced
Feb 17, 2021
245
For those who worry if N will degrade over time, take a look at this article!


 
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Takamagahara

Takamagahara

Seeker Of Heaven
Aug 8, 2023
142
Having never had access to N, it's unfortunate that it's apparently so difficult to consume.

Guess this means that opiates and fentanyl are the real peaceful solution. Luckily, those are easier to get, at least relatively speaking.
 
John Ryder

John Ryder

"You're a smart kid...you'll figure it out."
Jul 7, 2023
334
I'm fascinated by the range of subjective reactions to (vet) N taste among those who have sampled, with some claiming it the most foul thing to ever touch their tongue and that they'd probably be unable to consume, some claiming it's just moderately unpleasant, and everything between. I personally believe that between established hacks (honey, orajel, powerful artificial sweetener etc) and common sense stuff like holding the breath and drinking rapidly, it won't be a big barrier for me at the time. The taste is a well established issue. I do think approaching it as a necessary chore ala colonoscopy prep beverage and not a weekend cocktail will be enough for most fortunate to have it.

And while it's reductive to label any method as "holy grail" since there are at least a handful tied for peacefulness of experience (N, seco, 5 drug cocktail, h/f/opioid OD, inerts, gunshot via brevity etc), N's high ranking is pretty legit even in spite of the taste issue. Anyway, best of luck to OP however you choose to proceed. If it were me I'd do everything possible to make the N work. It's more holy grail than sn for sure.

Edit: forgot the part where OP mentioned having just one 6.5g bottle left. Given the health issue there I can understand it, though depending on size/bmi/overall health just 6.5 g is still likely to work albeit with longer time to death. If you can put off for a couple weeks I would look into sourcing phenytoin sodium to supplement the N, which is purported to have a powerful cardioxic effect that shortens time to death and could be the difference for a "borderline" amt like you have. (There are vet mixtures that include the phenytoin). Search for Dilantin, it can be had w/o prescription. Hell even without that I'd still opt for the N. Power it down and try to have a *really* big window of time (24+) open, imo
 
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B

bigbeatmanifesto

Member
Oct 21, 2021
67
Re N and its horrible taste, has no one thought to use a beer bong? I've never used one but have heard it allows you down litres of beer in seconds and avoids you having to taste anything.
 
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Lost Magic

Lost Magic

Visionary
May 5, 2020
2,980
For those who worry if N will degrade over time, take a look at this article!


Just curious as to what your take on the article is. How long do you think liquid N would last in a sealed bottle?
I read in the article "Data illustrate that sodium pentobarbital was detectable up to 367 days in compose piles with no clear trend of concentration reduction" says Authors Payne et al., 2015. [5]. So does that mean it still stays intact for those amount of days in the dead animals?
 

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