I am not afraid to die whatsoever, is this normal?

[RandomFellowIdc]

I am not afraid to die. If anything, the idea is comforting. I'm fully ready to leave everything behind and kick the bucket whenever, I seriously don't care.
What I am afraid of is my last moments being very painful, but death itself does not scare me. I welcome it, I have very little to lose anymore
Life does scare me. Something very traumatising happened to me recently and the one thing I lived for was a lie all along. Every day is a struggle where I am fighting just to not lose my mind. I have nothing left to live for and I don't enjoy life. I hate living, actually.
Death is just the end of life. It's not inherently a bad thing, and it's inevitable anyway, so I see no reason to run from it when I don't have a reason to stick around in the first place

 

[SVEN]

If there were an easy, painless way to leave this life I'd guess an awful lot of members wouldn't be here anymore. So, I don't believe that you're at all unusual in having apprehensions not about death, but how you die.
Best wishes in finding some resolution to the dilemma.

 

[floop]

i think you hit it right on the head, i'm completely in the same boat, dying is an extremely comforting thought. i'm also scared of my last moments being painful, but continuing to live is even scarier. i hope whatever the future may bring for you, you can find peace, rooting for you :)

 

[archaea]

I feel the same way. After 4 tries. I'm only afraid of pain. Every birthday candle wish.

 

[FuneralCry]

I really understand, I'd personally be so relieved to finally cease existing and never suffer in this existence ever again, for me non-existence is all that's desirable, I just want this existence to finally be all gone and forgotten about. I also fear existing, I find it terrifying how a human can suffer for so long with no limit as to how much agony they can feel, non-existence would solve everything for me as after all if I don't exist I cannot suffer in any way, there are no disadvantages to being unconscious for all eternity, I'd personally always prefer to not exist, I also hate existing.