
Meimi18
Beep boop
- Nov 1, 2023
- 68
Lately I've been daydreaming about withering away and dying that way. I'm running out of ways to entertain the people I care about, I wish I could easily accept that eventually they'll get bored or annoyed with me and leave one day. It's strange, I think about how they'd be rid a burden and get happy at the thought, but another less rational part of me finds the idea completely agonizing. I wish I could stay rational about it, I don't really have anything of substance to add to their lives. I wish I wasn't so desperate for company, it's like I have all these parts working against eachother, really wishing I could just turn off my emotions and execute my plan without any internal obstacles
Technically my plan these days is to wait until they move on from me before I ctb, but that really relies on me being disciplined enough to not make it show how much I hate the idea lol. I don't know how I can continue to be a good friend and still start drifting away from them.
I hope my dear friends will forget about me and be happy in their lives
Technically my plan these days is to wait until they move on from me before I ctb, but that really relies on me being disciplined enough to not make it show how much I hate the idea lol. I don't know how I can continue to be a good friend and still start drifting away from them.
I hope my dear friends will forget about me and be happy in their lives