Help How to CTB when you're too afraid/hesitant to do it?

[YoungJijii]

I'm so burdened by my problems and I feel like death is the only way to escape, but I'm hesitant to ctb

 

[denix66]

lograría ctb tan feliz como con N....... tengo exceso....???? .miedo de que mi tolerancia me ponga en peligro .....que opinas de esto ....alguien con tolerancia a los opiáceos ....tramadol y PALEXIA ...y benzos .xanax y lormetacepan ....?? ? ? No tolera Fentanilo ni H..

 

[day]

I have been actively practicing hanging to the point where I almost pass out to attempt to fight SI. I also routinely dry fire my gun into my neck to prep if I go that route. Sadly with SN there's no way to prep. I'd like to think that it helps just slightly though.

Wish you nothing but well OP. I hope you find peace no matter what you decide.

 

[jazzcat]

if you're hesitant don't do it, ctb should be the last resort, SI is our body's natural response but your mind should be completely made up and it doesn't sound like it is

 

[liljeep]

Keep hesitating. If you were certain you need to CTB, you wouldn't hesitate because of fear or any other reason. Attempting before you're really ready will likely result in you stopping midway through your method and possibly getting hospitalized depending what you did.

 

[HallucinatedHappy]

If it helps, Windingdown had a guide called "Ways of making peace.." in which they explained a bit about their perspective on CTB.
"(6) I think the most important thing, when choosing a method, is to choose one that (a) is reliable, and (b) you can bring yourself to do. It doesn't matter how flawless it is, if you cannot bring yourself to do it. And be as gentle with yourself as you can around it. I'm not going to wake up early to do it anymore, and give myself an alarm to dread; I'll do it at my own pace, get everything ordered, not rush myself. Ease into it. Just whatever makes it feel doable, and as comfortable as possible. I wish I could stuff chocolates into my mouth after I have drunk it, the way people are allowed to do with Nembutal. Hey, maybe I will allow myself just one. I like that."

Be gentle, is my advice. It will always be my advice in anything. Be gentle with yourself, be patient. You can do anything with practice and/or a bit of patience. Do not feel like you need to step on the gas, or overcome some kind of boundary. It will come to you when you need it.
BUT, the same also goes for getting help. It can feel wrong, but be gentle about it with yourself. Be the kind of person who, if you were a soft teddy bear, you'd want re-assuring yourself. You can be okay.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I'm so burdened by my problems and I feel like death is the only way to escape, but I'm hesitant to ctb

In this case your are not ready for the one or other personal reason. Once you are ready to CTB it's easy to overcome SI and everything else you've must have reached your personal state of total desperation with no hope left. I hope you can find peace!

 

[Pidgeons_Sparrows]

god knows how, i wish i knew man

I have been actively practicing hanging to the point where I almost pass out to attempt to fight SI. I also routinely dry fire my gun into my neck to prep if I go that route. Sadly with SN there's no way to prep. I'd like to think that it helps just slightly though.

Wish you nothing but well OP. I hope you find peace no matter what you decide.

i just watch hanging gore videos to desensitize myself
wish i had some more alone time to practice :/

 

[FuneralCry]

I just think that after all only the individual knows when the time is right to leave, but I do think that those who managed to succeed just got so determined and likely desperate and they had a method that they felt confident in, sadly suicide just isn't straightforward in this world especially as we exist in such an anti-suicide society where peaceful method options are restricted. I believe that suicide certainly should be easier.

 

[YoungJijii]

I just think that after all only the individual knows when the time is right to leave, but I do think that those who managed to succeed just got so determined and likely desperate and they had a method that they felt confident in, sadly suicide just isn't straightforward in this world especially as we exist in such an anti-suicide society where peaceful method options are restricted. I believe that suicide certainly should be easier.

Honestly. I wish people weren't so anti-suicide. I don't get why people who are suffering should stay alive purely to not make other people sad.

 

[DutchMister1488]

Use powder x if you wanna know more feel free to ask

 

[eashanm]

If it helps, Windingdown had a guide called "Ways of making peace.." in which they explained a bit about their perspective on CTB.
"(6) I think the most important thing, when choosing a method, is to choose one that (a) is reliable, and (b) you can bring yourself to do. It doesn't matter how flawless it is, if you cannot bring yourself to do it. And be as gentle with yourself as you can around it. I'm not going to wake up early to do it anymore, and give myself an alarm to dread; I'll do it at my own pace, get everything ordered, not rush myself. Ease into it. Just whatever makes it feel doable, and as comfortable as possible. I wish I could stuff chocolates into my mouth after I have drunk it, the way people are allowed to do with Nembutal. Hey, maybe I will allow myself just one. I like that."

Be gentle, is my advice. It will always be my advice in anything. Be gentle with yourself, be patient. You can do anything with practice and/or a bit of patience. Do not feel like you need to step on the gas, or overcome some kind of boundary. It will come to you when you need it.
BUT, the same also goes for getting help. It can feel wrong, but be gentle about it with yourself. Be the kind of person who, if you were a soft teddy bear, you'd want re-assuring yourself. You can be okay.

Link to this: Windingdown had a guide called "Ways of making peace.

 

[𖣂𖣂𖣂.]

Wish it was that easy to press a button and make all my problems disappear

 

[eashanm]

If it helps, Windingdown had a guide called "Ways of making peace.." in which they explained a bit about their perspective on CTB.
"(6) I think the most important thing, when choosing a method, is to choose one that (a) is reliable, and (b) you can bring yourself to do. It doesn't matter how flawless it is, if you cannot bring yourself to do it. And be as gentle with yourself as you can around it. I'm not going to wake up early to do it anymore, and give myself an alarm to dread; I'll do it at my own pace, get everything ordered, not rush myself. Ease into it. Just whatever makes it feel doable, and as comfortable as possible. I wish I could stuff chocolates into my mouth after I have drunk it, the way people are allowed to do with Nembutal. Hey, maybe I will allow myself just one. I like that."

Be gentle, is my advice. It will always be my advice in anything. Be gentle with yourself, be patient. You can do anything with practice and/or a bit of patience. Do not feel like you need to step on the gas, or overcome some kind of boundary. It will come to you when you need it.
BUT, the same also goes for getting help. It can feel wrong, but be gentle about it with yourself. Be the kind of person who, if you were a soft teddy bear, you'd want re-assuring yourself. You can be okay.

@HallucinatedHappy - Why are you liking my reply lol? Send me the link

 

[Bobert_Beniro]

You can do this through force, well, or simply by turning off your head. This is how I shaved my head for the first time, it was hard for me to part with my hair, but I didn't want to go with a bald patch, so I just took the scissors in my hands, turned off my mind and started to automatically cut them off
Or reach the point of no return. Half a year ago I had a situation in my life when I wanted to die right on the same day, the fear of death did not frighten me at all! Recently I had a suspicion of rheumatoid arthritis, but it was not confirmed, although I was sure in case of a positive result I would ctb. Last year I broke up with a girl, I didn't give a damn about my life so much that I was ready to ctb at any moment

 

[YoungJijii]

Use powder x if you wanna know more feel free to ask

Hey, sorry for the late reply as I haven't gotten any emails from this site. What's powder x?

 

[HallucinatedHappy]

@HallucinatedHappy - Why are you liking my reply lol? Send me the link

Because you weren't clear enough in your request for a link.

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