How long you’ve been wanting to Ctb?

[Steamm]

I'm almost two years since I lost 300k us and all I want is to ctb but everytime my SI kicks in. Any advice on how can I pass that and finally do what I have to?

 

[ryla2090]

I'd suggest doing practice runs of your CTB method. May I ask what it is?

 

[Despondent]

Since I was eight -- ten years

 

[ryla2090]

I'm almost two years since I lost 300k us and all I want is to ctb but everytime my SI kicks in. Any advice on how can I pass that and finally do what I have to?

Answer to your question: Active attempts(1 Year)/Thinking about it(5+ Years)

 

[Lady black]

Since I´m 12, first try was at the age of 20

 

[Deleted member 14386]

300k?! were you one of those early bitcoin buyers lol
I think 15 was the first time I really started think about it, I was against it at first even thinking "mentally ill" people shouldn't have that choice. Obviously my view has changed. so 10 years but only 6 really pursuing it

 

[BPD Barbie]

Since 14 so 16 years now.

 

[Broken Chimera]

Since I´m 12, first try was at the age of 20

This.

 

[your pathologist]

Since 2017... the first time the medicine destroyed my sleep and left me a helpless zombie...
It's been better...
But playing around with psychiatric pills has only gotten me grief

 

[SuicideBoys93]

I'd say the passed few years I've become really impulsive. It's taken years of depression/anxiety for my brain to normalize me taking my own life. I have two means of CTB sitting in my garage. CO2 poisoning, and SN. I acquired them through impulsively buying them. I think if I ever go it'll be one hell of a impulse that got me. I don't really want to die. I just want this shit to be over. I've felt pretty good all week, and now my wife was to be in a bad mood, and it's really testing me today. My impulses are wanting to dig at me. I'm trying to fight them by occupying my mind through Xbox.

 

[Mr2005]

It's more a case of trying not to for ten years

 

[Final Escape]

I would say it became more pronounced as I began to learn about all the brainwashing I've been subjected to. My re-education began on YouTube around age 34, I was horrified. All the truth tellers were on YouTube and when I woke up I was relieved but also very devastated that this is the reality of the system we live under. I was upset that because of my lack of understanding of moral right and wrong behavior severely impacted my life. I mean it's not like I had no idea about any right and wrong but I bought into the moral relativism when I was young. Not understanding the differences between men and women was also very harmful because if u don't understand the opposite sex or your own sex it sets u up for disaster.

 

[SuicideBoys93]

Like right now I'm headed to the store to buy the antacids and everything else for SN. F****** impulses man.

 

[AlreadyGone]

Since last Summer. So going on a year now.

 

[Mustkeyknow]

Since last Summer. So going on a year now.

Same

 

[Proto]

Since i was six when my mother died.

 

[LMLN]

It's been a year of active suicidal thoughts. Maybe 5-8 years passive suicidal.

 

[SimplyTopHat]

Passively Suicidal: 12/13 (early teens, around 7th grade)
First attempt: 25
Passively Suicidal: 26 - 29 (Attempted Recovery)
Actively Suicidal: 1 year (29-30)

 

[oxymoron]

I'm almost two years since I lost 300k us and all I want is to ctb but everytime my SI kicks in. Any advice on how can I pass that and finally do what I have to?

2 years

 

[s1mplem3]

Not sure if I wanted to CTB for a long time, but I don't remember myself as someone who ever wanted to live.

 

[Whitewash11235814]

like 4 years on and off.

 

[nonamegirl]

on/off for many years. But more consistently for 3 years now.

 

[Ulisses]

I would say it became more pronounced as I began to learn about all the brainwashing I've been subjected to. My re-education began on YouTube around age 34, I was horrified. All the truth tellers were on YouTube and when I woke up I was relieved but also very devastated that this is the reality of the system we live under. I was upset that because of my lack of understanding of moral right and wrong behavior severely impacted my life. I mean it's not like I had no idea about any right and wrong but I bought into the moral relativism when I was young. Not understanding the differences between men and women was also very harmful because if u don't understand the opposite sex or your own sex it sets u up for disaster.

the discovery of how society works and the differences in sex were also driven by wanting ctb.

 

[Final Escape]

the discovery of how society works and the differences in sex were also driven by wanting ctb.

What do u mean?

 

[Marchioness]

The first time I really remember is when I was mine years old, alone in my kitchen with a long kitchen knife looking into my reflection in the dishwasher and crying how disgusting I felt. I had been groomed by my neighbor.

 

[Ulisses]

What do u mean?

ginoteista society. the man has no value, so serve to pay bills. sex is a bargaining chip. looking for redpill

 

[faust]

I started being suicidal when I was 16 (planned to CTB the year after)
When I was 17, I gave myself another chance.
1,5 years ago schizoaffective disorder kicked in and the situation started going much worse.
Actively suicidal I became probably not long ago, before I was willing to escape from the world I live in. So technically 6 years with a break.

 

[TimeToBiteTheDust]

Since October. Life went to shit. Can't fix. :(

 

[Final Escape]

ginoteista society. the man has no value, so serve to pay bills. sex is a bargaining chip. looking for redpill

As a woman who grew up without my father I didn't know that we live under feminism or exactly what this meant. I assumed men just don't really want to stick around once the woman has kids lol! I assumed this growing up seeing all the single mothers in section 8 housing. I didn't know it had more to do with women maybe not choosing men well, or possibly driving a good guy away, there's no longer oversight/social ostracism to make sure we aren't getting pregnant outside of marriage. Or that most of the time women initiate divorce. I had no idea about all this. I just figured men mainly want to use us for sex and children, but they don't necessarily want to actually hang out once the kids are there. I was also sexually abused at age 10 so that's one reason I didn't know that I had a messed up worldview from it. A neighbors father came on to me as a young teenager too so I just assumed men were mainly interested in sex without responsibility. Lol! I know right?

 

[Deleted member 14386]

As a woman who grew up without my father I didn't know that we live under feminism or exactly what this meant. I assumed men just don't really want to stick around once the woman has kids lol! I assumed this growing up seeing all the single mothers in section 8 housing. I didn't know it had more to do with women maybe not choosing men well, or possibly driving a good guy away, there's no longer oversight/social ostracism to make sure we aren't getting pregnant outside of marriage. Or that most of the time women initiate divorce. I had no idea about all this.

Offtopic: I thought men just ran out on their kids too, but then I found out my mom physically took me from my dads house without him knowing, moved 300 miles away to a family members house. My dad wanted to see me but mom threatened court and he settled out of court (the lawyer said theres no chance of anything better since the judge was a woman! How sexist!), for paying child-support and 28 days per year of visiting time. And here I am lmao