How does one deal with manipulative, narcissistic family members?

[aboy1995]

You know, the ones who like to gossip and spread misinformation and won't listen to a word you have to say, yet, they'll try to "get people on their side" just for power.

I've been dealing with this for a year now, and this time, it's bad. I am unable to defend myself because they don't listen. (well they never have!) They constantly want to bring up the past even when it doesn't even relate to what started everything.

I'm just so sick of it. Sick of defending myself. Sick of being accused of doing things I'm not doing. My life is not perfect by any means. I'm in debt $8k+, I lost my job, and I have absolutely no motivation anymore to do anything.

 

[Forgetting5]

The only thing you can do is just ignore it. Trying to tame a wildfire of nonstop lies and manipulation is pointless and only hurts the victim.

 

[deathviahanging]

my honest advice for u rn is to ignore them to the best of your abilities try not defending urself and tune them out they'll eventually get bored and find something better to do

 

[Deleted User#81194]

Yeah I know who you're talking about: I usually just resort to blackmail, cutting their internet connection, resetting their phone, leaving dead animals in their room, threatening to reveal embarrassing photos, jamming the electricity -- the list goes on. it just angers me so much when someone is blatantly being manipulative and dishonest, especially when they're aware that they know and that they know I know what they're doing, but will keep doing it regardless because they have others on their side and believe they can get away with it.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I guess it depends on whether you think this would hurt you more but I would say- cut all ties. I don't think you can 'manage' a narcissist. They are masters of manipulation.

I'd recommend two YouTube channels also that talk about narcissists and dealing with them: 'Live Abuse Free' and 'The Crappy Childhood Fairy'.

I was lucky enough to be able to get away from someone I believe to be a narcissist. I hope you are able to free yourself too- or, learn ways to cope.