princeseadove
wannabe angel
- Mar 4, 2025
- 29
On Thursday, my dad slammed my head against the wall and nearly choked me. The whole day I spent dissociating. I have faced far worse from him, from nearly getting passed out, to him kicking my uterus and kickstarting my period. But that time I just started to break down. Maybe it's because of just the whole stress I have been going through with my exams and whatnot, I go to school and a "friend" is giving my attitude, and I have no one. No one to ask if I'm okay, no one to be there for me. There was some girls, but it was very short lived. I think I'm going crazy. From my delusions and I swear I am hallucinating bjt I am lying I am not I am not. But I feel like I am. They are people who go through worse than me, and I know there is. But it doesn't feel like it. It feels totally alone, alienated. That day on Thursday, I was left alone I'm my classroom feeling totally unreal and sickened. How am I supposed to deal with this? My parents will not let me go. Another year. Than what? How much longer? How much longer? Nobody understands. Nobody cares. I am alone. And it's all my fault. It feels like my fault. I am so isolated, so kept inside, so alone now. Just last Christmas on my birthday I had hope. Now I just wish something will make this all go awsy. My father fantasies about hitting me. About shutting me up for good. My mother thinks I'm the most selfish egotistical cunt there is. And she knows I am going crazy. But none of them care. Nobody. God has forsaken me. Where is god? Where is he? What can I do? I feel over dramatic. But god how much longer? How much longer? I am suffering, I am suffering, I am suffering. And everyone is cruel and abysmal. I am suffering. Please. Have mercy please please.
How can you handle this? I don't know. I don't know anymore. I come on here pleading, and I know people here might have faced worse than me, so I just need to know. I used to go into my daydreams, but people and their cruelty have ruined it for me. I feel so young, like a little child. But I am an adult now. Forever and ever
How can you handle this? I don't know. I don't know anymore. I come on here pleading, and I know people here might have faced worse than me, so I just need to know. I used to go into my daydreams, but people and their cruelty have ruined it for me. I feel so young, like a little child. But I am an adult now. Forever and ever
Last edited:
