So happy I got to hang out with some old friends today. I used to hang out with some of these guys all the time and we'd play so much Smash Bros but today we did all that and also got to have fun playing Magic the Gathering and even Darts and Billiards at a nearby bar. I'm also a bit conflicted that this is some of the best life has to offer and yet it's not enough to make a living out of. I wish it really was easy to just find a way to monetize hanging out with good friends everyday. Surely that's the case for some people but not many.
Reactions:
fleetingnight, lemonbunny, Mirrory Me and 1 other person
Like a failure and like my life will never amount to anything. I'm so stuck in the sadness right now that I don't know what to do. Everyones advice to me at this point is to just pretend to be happy essentially and I don't know how to do that. I've been in this state for so long that I don't even know what happiness looks like. I wish I could just disappear. I wish I was never even born.
Reactions:
fleetingnight, Praestat_Mori, Ash and 1 other person
I fucked up relationship again, I do realize that I am fucked up and I will never be a normal person even if I wanted to. I just couldn't act their way, and they all see me as bipolar manic autist and avoid me.
but hopefully I can live the way I want to, people wouldn't like it if they knew, but it's the only way I can go.
Mainly just very tired. It's 6:49 over here, and I haven't closed my eyes all night. Sleeping doesn't do much for me anymore, I could sleep as long as humanly possible and I'd still wake up nauseous and exhausted like everyday. I just WISH I can get some actual rest sometime soon, it's been so long
Nervous/stressed, especially for work tomorrow since the heat index might rise into the 100s and I work outdoors, so this will be a rough weekend for me, followed by a grueling 4th of July week :/
This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.