Discussion How did u end up here?

[demitriusmigsysvotf]

I'm really looking forward to hear some of your stories if u want to tell em. I don't know what else to write. I just want to talk to someone here.

 

[lizzywizzy09]

Health issues, ASD, and a toxic and neglectful home environment do not mix. Let's just put it that way. The damage is irreparable and I feel I have no choice unless I want to suffer immensely.

 

[KillingPain267]

It's a long story. It all started when my parents met each other...

 

[demitriusmigsysvotf]

Health issues, ASD, and a toxic and neglectful home environment do not mix. Let's just put it that way. The damage is irreparable and I feel I have no choice unless I want to suffer immensely.

Well, I have some similar reasons. Hope u get better sometime (sorry I can't say smth normal, cause I'm stupid)

It's a long story. It all started when my parents met each other...

Oh…

 

[opheliaoveragain]

I found this place pre covid as a longtime lurker but then my devices changed and life happened. Funnily enough I was looking up things on google in June because everything has quickly gone to shit and a f New York Times article talking shit about the site, had it listed at the bottom, I clicked wondering if SaSu had been shut down and re made but alas, I was home again.

 

[demitriusmigsysvotf]

I found this place pre covid as a longtime lurker but then my devices changed and life happened. Funnily enough I was looking up things on google in June because everything has quickly gone to shit and a f New York Times article talking shit about the site, had it listed at the bottom, I clicked wondering if SaSu had been shut down and re made but alas, I was home again.

Personally, I knew about it in some sort of a video that says "oh this sites forces ppl to ctb" or something. I quickly knew the name of the site even though author tried to hide it and I ended up here

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I was searching Google for a transcript of the 'View from Halfway Down' poem from the penultimate Bojack Horseman episode. Someone on this site happened to have posted it so that's how I found this website. I ended up joining because my paternal grandparents both died within a week of each other and I was feeling guilty that I didn't go to their funerals because I didn't want to face my father.

 

[pollux]

The site itself I think I saw someone mention it on some 4chan board, but I don't remember which.

 

[Throwawayacc3]

Well, I have some similar reasons. Hope u get better sometime (sorry I can't say smth normal, cause I'm stupid)



Oh…

That fucking nobody…. Is John Wick.


…….oh.

 

[ADBoy777]

Depression from finding no meaning in life. Can't wait for it to end. You know you belong here when life are your nightmare and death is your far away dream

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I was deeply depressed, in total desperation and hopeless. I was ready to ctb with my method and wanted to attempt. I don't remember what I searched for exactly but I found SaSu easily and I made an account the same night.

 

[TheLastBoyOnEarth]

I've been having a chronic pain condition the last ten years. I always had hope it would get better through time but it only got worse. I'm still deciding if I should kill myself or just let the illness kill me slowly.

 

[demitriusmigsysvotf]

I was deeply depressed, in total desperation and hopeless. I was ready to ctb with my method and wanted to attempt. I don't remember what I searched for exactly but I found SaSu easily and I made an account the same night.

Oh, same thing with me. Nearly. As mentioned in one of my messages here I found it through YouTube, but I decided to join because of how bad I felt. And it got even worse

I've been having a chronic pain condition the last ten years. I always had hope it would get better through time but it only got worse. I'm still deciding if I should kill myself or just let the illness kill me slowly.

Do you have someone who would care if you ctb?

 

[DazedConfused]

I'm really looking forward to hear some of your stories if u want to tell em. I don't know what else to write. I just want to talk to someone

 

[JensenX]

I've been having a chronic pain condition the last ten years. I always had hope it would get better through time but it only got worse. I'm still deciding if I should kill myself or just let the illness kill me slowly.

Having physical ailments and pain makes the job a bit easier. Maybe you're not quite there yet.

I'm a fairly healthy 65 yo with no physical ailments other than what normal ageing throws my way. I'm living in a foreign country, with no family or friends and totally broke after maxing out all my credit cards a while back. Covid f***k my business and I tried to get out of it by trading, which went badly.

It's quite simple really - I can't afford to live much longer, so I'm planning my exit. Being a homeless old man in a foreign land is not my idea of living. I even wrote a scheduled email to my landlord that he should receive 48 hours after my passing, He's a good bloke, so I don't want him to discover a highly decomposed corpse after many weeks in my bedroom. I want to take care of business in the comfort of my bedroom. My body will be thrown into an unmarked grave where they put unclaimed bodies in Thailand.

 

[DazedConfused]

Undiagnosed depression for years .. tbf I failed to ask for help. More recently money difficulties and a lack of interest in living. I'm hoping to get hit by a bus or something, I can't even be asked to figure out how to CTB,.

 

[JensenX]

I was searching Google for a transcript of the 'View from Halfway Down' poem from the penultimate Bojack Horseman episode. Someone on this site happened to have posted it so that's how I found this website. I ended up joining because my paternal grandparents both died within a week of each other and I was feeling guilty that I didn't go to their funerals because I didn't want to face my father.

I see you've been here for 4 years already, and made nearly 20,000 posts. It looks like this forum has kept you alive and well; it has given you a channel for getting things off your chest.

 

[Sarros]

I opened my eyes to the fact I don't have to be here. That the option exists for me to stop when I want to. No matter where I am in my life, how my circumstances change, how I feel, the option is always there. And once you see it, it never goes away, for better or worse.

 

[JensenX]

Do you have someone who would care if you ctb?

This is an interesting question. I have distanced myself from my family who live in another country. I haven't seen any of them for 14 years. They are too busy with their own lives to "give a shit". Even if they did care, they couldn't help me anyway as it's all about money. I would prefer they never find out why I disappeared without a trace.

I have deliberately isolated myself from other humans as I don't want to explain myself to anyone. I don't want fake sympathy from people who don't understand my situation or people thinking that I'm crazy and need fixing. It's a lonely existence and I often talk to myself LOL. I don't want people fussing over me.

I'm in a situation where I can end my life without anyone knowing. As mentioned before, I have planned to send a scheduled email to my landlord so he can find my body and report it to the police. There'll be no next-of-kin to handle my corpse, so I'll just be an unclaimed body to dispose of.

 

[Timothy7dff]

The military deep state won't let me exist. Their goal is to maximize the amount of pain in my life. Every time I get my life going, they beat the living crp out of me. They want to keep me alive, but in absolute pain. Truly evil people. Reminds me of Abu Grahib and all the other military torture programs.

I did everything I could to turn my life around. I exceeded my own expectations. The deep state literally placed someone in my place of living to help take all my money. I battled back from one deep state beating, but they're relentless. As long as I'm breathing, some deep state Nazi will be dedicated to destroying my life.

Money, health, friendships, spirituality, hope, etc. all blow to smithereens by deep state Nazis.

 

[meoka<3]

Found and watched a YouTube video about the site. I immediately wanted to visit it myself, as I related with the users and site's purpose. Though the creator took care to avoid naming it, after some practically effortless digging, I found it. There's a kind of irony in someone making a video about how disgusting a site is, only to help to them gain a new member. :)

 

[tary]

I was looking for suicide information online when I came across a Vice article about this forum. I knew I had to find this place.
The article used a fake name, so I googled that and after a whole lot of scrolling, I finally found it mentioned in a thread here about the article.

 

[Dark Moon]

I don't really fit into the mold that is society, autism and I just don't want to live and suffer the struggles of being a human.

 

[JensenX]

Found and watched a YouTube video about the site. I immediately wanted to visit it myself, as I related with the users and site's purpose. Though the creator took care to avoid naming it, after some practically effortless digging, I found it. There's a kind of irony in someone making a video about how disgusting a site is, only to help to them gain a new member. :)

I'd love to see that video - do you have a link?

 

[meoka<3]

The article used a fake name, so I googled that and after a whole lot of scrolling, I finally found it mentioned in a thread here about the article.

Seems any coverage about the site only grows it, huh? Similar thing happened to me

I'd love to see that video - do you have a link?

It's basically about how horrible it is. Bit of a misrepresentation, to me. Anyway, here's the link:

 

[LifeTransit_1]

Found it from the YouTube video that discusses about this forum. Been a lurker since early 2023. Signed up and accepted into the forum in late October of '23. Was the best thing I have done in over 5 years. Though I did take a month long break just now... SS has helped me feel accepted of my problems and beliefs.

 

[Traveller12724]

Funny enough I got here through the stupid BBC article that was supposed to take down this forum and its creators, I was doing research for methods when I was directed to that article and upon further digging I found the actual website they were talking about. Funny, isn't it ? The tool that was meant to destroy this forum end up becoming the publicity for the website to get more members. I guess it's true what they say, there is no such thing as bad publicity.

 

[combatcuteness]

I don't exactly remember, I suspect it was when I was doing research regarding nembutal and the peaceful pill.

 

[Melancholic_Misfit]

this was the only place i felt like i could turn back to after my former polycule and their friends all turned against me uncritically

 

[ultrasharpy123456]

I was looking for suicide methods other than the cutting the carotid and subclavian artery.