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StevieNixs

StevieNixs

Specialist
Jul 22, 2021
316
Falling out with close family members etc to make it easier to exit. I keep arguing with my mother ... putting the phone down on her and I think it is because I want to have that distance needed to do what I need to do....
 
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Chiisai

Chiisai

To infinity and beyond!
Sep 1, 2021
754
Falling out with close family members etc to make it easier to exit. I keep arguing with my mother ... putting the phone down on her and I think it is because I want to have that distant needed to do what I need to do....
I feel you. It seems its a natural reaction to distance oneself? Its like protecting them from hurt by making them used to having less of your presence?
 
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logan

logan

Warlock
May 20, 2021
705
This is understandable.
But I think that doesn't make it any easier for the others.

Maybe you should make good use of the remaining time together.
 
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WrongPlaceWrongTime

WrongPlaceWrongTime

Better never to have been
Jul 4, 2021
695
I have thought about this, though I don't have the will to ruin relationships. Making them hate you/miss you less would probably take a long time, maybe a few months.
 
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F

fred1

Member
Sep 23, 2021
18
Falling out with close family members etc to make it easier to exit. I keep arguing with my mother ... putting the phone down on her and I think it is because I want to have that distance needed to do what I need to do....
Please please don't do that to your mother, I understand how you are feeling but I lost my son after a stupid row and I have to live with this and honestly it's killing me, please you will never know how much you will hurt her, if there is no other way out for u then tell her U love her don't fight with her, write her a letter so she understand or at least tries to understand why u wanted to die, don't leave her with the guilt leave her with love
 
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H0110W

H0110W

Member
Sep 22, 2021
96
I think doing this may be a sign of some kind of mental illness. I've basically done it with everyone I know, and I'm starting with my family as well. It fucking sucks tbqh. I don't want them to hate me but I could not help it.
 
BottomlessPit

BottomlessPit

Staring at the edge
Apr 28, 2021
423
I guess I'm lucky that I started distancing myself unwittingly years ago. The emotional fallout of my ctb will be rather limited (but still considerable).
 
StevieNixs

StevieNixs

Specialist
Jul 22, 2021
316
I think doing this may be a sign of some kind of mental illness. I've basically done it with everyone I know, and I'm starting with my family as well. It fucking sucks tbqh. I don't want them to hate me but I could not help it.
Nah doing this for me is a means of allowing me to CTB without feeling I need to still hang on because my sister died in July. My mum's grief over the death of my sister has meant I have to hang on longer than I want to despite being in immense pain myself. It's hard to explain...
 
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SOL3HIRO

SOL3HIRO

Member
Jan 8, 2020
32
For me, I've done this with friends. I broke up with my at-the-time boyfriend making excuses to no longer want to talk to him so then I don't feel like I need to live for him. At this point it doesn't matter whether you do care for them or not; what matters is the goal to CTB.
It could also be just feeling like you're incapable of caring for other people when you're going through pain and ofc, this could be bc you want to CTB.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,742
I just keep my distance from people as much as I can. I broke contact with my friends years ago. I never speak to most of my relatives anyway. I haven't fell out with anyone and I do not see a need to. There isn't many people that I would be leaving behind anyway. I think if I still had friends, I would fall out with them. I do not think that falling out with people will make them feel less pain when you eventually ctb though.
 
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