Venting Gun to the head

[TornReality]

One bullet, less than a second.
It's been my preferred way for awhile.
I'm scared. I'm scared of what's after.
But it can't be any worse than today, right?
I'm not going to do it today. I'm just venting. I'm tired. Tired of the crap I go through.
But, I feel like that would be the best option? Quick, done with.

 

[Michelstaedter]

I imagine it and I can't stop imagining it. Ironically, it's the method that gives me the most confidence in being able to achieve it, but also the one that scares me the most because of the after-effects (being left a vegetable and drooling for life).
Like you, I'm afraid of the afterlife, even the absurd "nothingness." When I sleep and don't remember the dream, okay, I slept and I don't remember the dream, but what about when I die? No consciousness? No memories? No last moment before dying? The famous tunnel?

 

[deathisapanacea]

Those who have access to guns and the mental fortitude to pull the trigger are blessed

 

[galaxid]

Those who have access to guns and the mental fortitude to pull the trigger are blessed

Boy do I hope I'm close to divinity lol

I imagine it and I can't stop imagining it. Ironically, it's the method that gives me the most confidence in being able to achieve it, but also the one that scares me the most because of the after-effects (being left a vegetable and drooling for life).

Failing is the scariest part 100% It's particularly bad for me because I can't ever imagine myself owning or using a shotgun in any capacity. So I'll have to make do with a hand gun. That's always been the image in my head so I suppose it works out, but still.

 

[suicidegirl71]

One bullet, less than a second.
It's been my preferred way for awhile.
I'm scared. I'm scared of what's after.
But it can't be any worse than today, right?
I'm not going to do it today. I'm just venting. I'm tired. Tired of the crap I go through.
But, I feel like that would be the best option? Quick, done with.

I completely understand and feel the same way.

 

[avidreader49]

Those who have access to guns and the mental fortitude to pull the trigger are blessed

Agreed

 

[baberty]

I have to say I agree. I wish I were in that position.

 

[TornReality]

The mental ability to actually pull the trigger, is probably the hardest thing.
Once the trigger is pulled. It's over. No rethinking, no questioning the decision.

 

[GhostInTheMachine]

Can't have any hesitation marks if the "cut" happens all at once. For the highest chance, your best bet is definitely a shotgun, preferably 12 gauge. I would practice lining up with the brain stem so that separation is essentially guaranteed. I've seen aftermath footage of survivors, and it's traumatizing to even look at. I myself considered a .45, but I'm hyper worried that I'll be the tiniest bit off and end up invalid.

 

[alivefornow]

Sometimes I think I would have done it already if I had access to a gun. I never even held one. But then again, I could jump at any time and haven't done it. Even stood on a very high ledge but chickened out.

 

[GhostInTheMachine]

Jumping means you have to face the view "from halfway down". I fully understand why a lot of people don't jump. My back-up methods were either poisoning or literally driving my car into a bridge abutment.