Got my bus ticket

[Abandoned Phantom]

Well, I got my bus ticket. The feeling is bittersweet though, like, I really, REALLY don't want to be here, alive on this stupid planet. I REALLY don't want to continue living in this hellscape. But I feel awful about putting my family and friends through this pain. This past week has been the least depressed I've felt in months. I don't even think depressed is the right word. I just feel kind of empty. But this week I didn't feel quite so empty. Maybe it was just my brain's way of self-preservation. I don't know. I doesn't really matter too much.

Now I just have to make my final preparations. Finish my notes and letters, that kind of thing. Then I pick a day. Thinking Friday next week. Sometime after my best friend's birthday. But before it gets too close to Christmas. Trying to ruin the holidays as little as possible, you know. Friday will also give my mom the weekend to grieve before work on Monday.

 

[Hefinator]

Make sure to put the letters in proper MLA format

 

[Dr.Duck]

Hope you find your peace. You seem ready. You are very caring to write all the letters, not trying to ruin any celebrations for years.

 

[Abandoned Phantom]

Make sure to put the letters in proper MLA format

lol

 

[asthedayends00]

Well, I got my bus ticket. The feeling is bittersweet though, like, I really, REALLY don't want to be here, alive on this stupid planet. I REALLY don't want to continue living in this hellscape. But I feel awful about putting my family and friends through this pain. This past week has been the least depressed I've felt in months. I don't even think depressed is the right word. I just feel kind of empty. But this week I didn't feel quite so empty. Maybe it was just my brain's way of self-preservation. I don't know. I doesn't really matter too much.

Now I just have to make my final preparations. Finish my notes and letters, that kind of thing. Then I pick a day. Thinking Friday next week. Sometime after my best friend's birthday. But before it gets too close to Christmas. Trying to ruin the holidays as little as possible, you know. Friday will also give my mom the weekend to grieve before work on Monday.

Planning on a day makes it much harder than doing it on a whim. Godspeed

 

[Abandoned Phantom]

Hope you find your peace. You seem ready. You are very caring to write all the letters, not trying to ruin any celebrations for years.

Thank you kind duck. Been thinking about it for quite a long time. It's kinda always been there, in the back of my mind, since junior year of high school. 15 or so years ago. It would come and go. from being the only way I saw an out, to falling so far to the back that I completely forgot it was there. But I'm ready. Ready as I'll ever be.