Venting Goodbye

[ppie41]

I think today is the day. Living has become practically impossible for me at this point.
I love my boyfriend, my dogs, my dad, and all my friends who have been with me throughout my time here.

I'm going to rent out a motel room tonight and take xanax in the tub. I have bought a room there before, the tubs are both deep and long enough for me to lie completely down in them, so I don't have to worry about passing out with my head on the wall or anything. As for the xanax, I'm going to start with three, and keep re-dosing if I'm not passed out by then.

I am scared. I'm honestly shaking as I write this because I don't know what comes next and I know this is going to kill my boyfriend. I don't think he will ever be the same after this. I feel like a horrible person for doing this to him, but it's my time to go…

Im going to spend the rest of my day writing letters to everybody I need to say something to, and then I am finally going to ctb.
<3

 

[NorthernMonkey]

This is so heartbreaking to read. I hate that you are so scared you are shaking. I am sending love to you wherever you are and just hope that things work out for you, whatever that looks like.

 

[FuneralCry]

I wish you the best with your plans and I hope that you find the freedom you are searching for. I personally just believe that we cease existing after this, I don't think that death is something to fear as we are destined for nowhere but death anyway.

 

[senzim]

Sending love.

 

[CTB Dream]

Vry sry feel scare shak vry sry sffr this cruel life , rly hope peace hug

 

[Dead Meat]

Sorry to see you go @ppie41 wishing you a very comfortable journey on your way to everlasting peace you Beautiful Soul

 

[Valky]

This breaks my heart to read :(

Wishing you all the best <3

 

[Dot]

Hpe u hve thght v creflly abt ths

Srry tht lfe hs brght u 2 ths pnt

 

[outrider567]

I think today is the day. Living has become practically impossible for me at this point.
I love my boyfriend, my dogs, my dad, and all my friends who have been with me throughout my time here.

I'm going to rent out a motel room tonight and take xanax in the tub. I have bought a room there before, the tubs are both deep and long enough for me to lie completely down in them, so I don't have to worry about passing out with my head on the wall or anything. As for the xanax, I'm going to start with three, and keep re-dosing if I'm not passed out by then.

I am scared. I'm honestly shaking as I write this because I don't know what comes next and I know this is going to kill my boyfriend. I don't think he will ever be the same after this. I feel like a horrible person for doing this to him, but it's my time to go…

Im going to spend the rest of my day writing letters to everybody I need to say something to, and then I am finally going to ctb.
<3

Saturdays I always feel the worse, maybe because she worked for 38 years and we always had Saturdays together and our best times together, I'm sure it will be a Saturday when I do my own CTB

I think today is the day. Living has become practically impossible for me at this point.
I love my boyfriend, my dogs, my dad, and all my friends who have been with me throughout my time here.

I'm going to rent out a motel room tonight and take xanax in the tub. I have bought a room there before, the tubs are both deep and long enough for me to lie completely down in them, so I don't have to worry about passing out with my head on the wall or anything. As for the xanax, I'm going to start with three, and keep re-dosing if I'm not passed out by then.

I am scared. I'm honestly shaking as I write this because I don't know what comes next and I know this is going to kill my boyfriend. I don't think he will ever be the same after this. I feel like a horrible person for doing this to him, but it's my time to go…

Im going to spend the rest of my day writing letters to everybody I need to say something to, and then I am finally going to ctb.
<3

Wish you the best

 

[CellarBoy]

I really do wish you the best. I know you probably aren't on this world anymore and wont be able to read this, but I do wish you the best. I'm sorry that life has been so cruel, and I'm sorry that you're so scared, but I promise, once it's done, everything is going to be okay. Goodbye, friend.

 

[SilentSadness]

I hope you find the peace you have been missing in this cruel world.

 

[Letgo]

Hope you had a peaceful journey.

 

[lumibee]

It's okay to feel guilt. You're still human. Knowing you have a good heart to feel guilt and people who love you unconditionally even while you're this vulnerable says a lot about you already before your passing. I'm sad to see you go however I hope you find your happiness with whatever you decide to do

 

[Shivali]