Getting desperate

[kawaiiphantom]

I already tested and practiced with my set up 3 times. the thing is im getting so desperate that I feel like I need to hang myself tomorrow night. I can't take it anymore. But I know people could be home sleeping. I won't have enough time alone till next week but I'm so desperate. I know it's really bad to not be alone in house so not not get caught. Pphavent Finished my note yet but cant do this much. longer And my thoughts are scattered

 

[mortuarymary]

A Hotel?

 

[FuneralCry]

I hope that you eventually find freedom from your suffering, I find it so cruel how we cannot just choose to cease existing in a peaceful, guaranteed way.

 

[Kasumi]

Unless you absolutely have to for some reason, it's always better to give yourself some more time.
Simply because it's safer in every regard.
After all, if you can still ctb in a week or two then where is the point in doing it now unless your life is literally falling apart right now.

I don't know what the reasons are for your desperation now, but perhaps you can find ways to cope temporarily, even if it's something otherwise seen as drastic, such as leaving your home and just living in a hotel somewhere far away for a few days, drugs or whatever you can think of that would help.
What does it matter if you're goind to ctb anyway, might as well do everything you can to make your last weeks liveable no matter how crazy it sounds.