Kikorama
Member
- May 19, 2026
- 6
I have very high survival instinct, because i don't actually want to die, but my life is miserable because i can't achieve the goals i want and be the person i want to be because i have a chronic pain condition that deblitates my existence everyday and i have it for more than 10 years and since doctors/medicine aren't able to give me a fulfiling life i just can't keep dragging my depressive existence of thinking i can't never be who i want to be, seeing happy couples and people happy and knowing i can't never achieve that causes me panic attacks..
Why is this brief relevant, because i want a method that theres no going back once executed.
Partial Suspension dosen't work for me as i quickly get up and undo the knot
I also have a rule that i can't put my blood on third party hands soo anything like getting ran over by a truck/train is out of the equation and my ctb must in a isolated place where i can traumatize as less people as possible.
Since guns aren't legal in the european country where i live that isn't an option altough that would make it easier
The law for euthanasia has been approved by my governament in 2023 but it isn't on practice, Personally this would be the best option as i could gather a bunch of people that i could donate my organs since they are in great state and i'm young (25yo) and never had bad habbits, and this would grant me 100% success rate and my ctb would be usefull to save other people lives.
I also tought about injecting a lethal dose of fentanyl this would be a easy way to go out, but i don't know where to get it and this would be too risky if i get caught ordering it i go to jail
But as far as i'm aware I got two available options that meet my criteria Its either FSH or SN
I have my concerns about the two and i'm indecisive which to pick
With SN is that i don't have any anti emetic medication and i don't know how quick it is to ctb ( I didn't watch any videos online to avoid panic )
My Concerns with FSH is that i don't know if 20 mm thickness ideal enough just to cut the oxygen from the carotid artery i feel like less thicker ropes would hurt more and also could snap i wheigh (72kg) and i'm 1,65 cm , i also don't want to break my neck, And i don't have a place to do this yet
I just want to have things planned because as i try different treatments for my health condition and they fail to work i get more panic attacks in my head and i can't handle these traumatic emotions anymore soo i want to have it all planned soo when the time comes i can execute it and not fail.
Soo considering all this what is the best option for me FSH or SN?
Why is this brief relevant, because i want a method that theres no going back once executed.
Partial Suspension dosen't work for me as i quickly get up and undo the knot
I also have a rule that i can't put my blood on third party hands soo anything like getting ran over by a truck/train is out of the equation and my ctb must in a isolated place where i can traumatize as less people as possible.
Since guns aren't legal in the european country where i live that isn't an option altough that would make it easier
The law for euthanasia has been approved by my governament in 2023 but it isn't on practice, Personally this would be the best option as i could gather a bunch of people that i could donate my organs since they are in great state and i'm young (25yo) and never had bad habbits, and this would grant me 100% success rate and my ctb would be usefull to save other people lives.
I also tought about injecting a lethal dose of fentanyl this would be a easy way to go out, but i don't know where to get it and this would be too risky if i get caught ordering it i go to jail
But as far as i'm aware I got two available options that meet my criteria Its either FSH or SN
I have my concerns about the two and i'm indecisive which to pick
With SN is that i don't have any anti emetic medication and i don't know how quick it is to ctb ( I didn't watch any videos online to avoid panic )
My Concerns with FSH is that i don't know if 20 mm thickness ideal enough just to cut the oxygen from the carotid artery i feel like less thicker ropes would hurt more and also could snap i wheigh (72kg) and i'm 1,65 cm , i also don't want to break my neck, And i don't have a place to do this yet
I just want to have things planned because as i try different treatments for my health condition and they fail to work i get more panic attacks in my head and i can't handle these traumatic emotions anymore soo i want to have it all planned soo when the time comes i can execute it and not fail.
Soo considering all this what is the best option for me FSH or SN?
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