Tellurian120
New Member
- Nov 1, 2023
- 2
As you can tell from my join date, I joined this site a few years back but ended up forgetting about it until now. But right now, my life is in a complete and utter shambles, there doesn't seem to be any light for miles ahead.
For starters, I failed college, yet again. I had failed college a few times before, but I had failed the first year by only one unit, so they allowed me to move into the second year while completing the outstanding unit simultaneously. That was a very bad mistake on my part, as obviously most of my classmates this year had all been together the previous year, so they probably saw me as an interloper and completely shut me out (EDIT: Should have mentioned this was after two years since my last attempt at college - this wasn't my first-year classmates). The course was very dense so I was hoping to converse with classmates, but they shut down every attempt on my part to strike a conversation, and even though I gave them my phone number, they wouldn't add me to their WhatsApp group. So at times it was literally impossible to try to organize group projects outside of the class because I could not get in contact with them. Eventually I gave up and I've been told I've failed the most important part of the course, so no chance of me graduating.
My job is barely more palatable. I work in some small grocery shop with a post office attached to it, and I work both. And to add to that, I'm meant to do everything else behind the till as well, such as clean the bakery and hot-food sections, clean the oven, stock any cigarettes and spirits, and you have to do this while customers are waiting to be served. Maybe some people can do this, but I always end up feeling behind. And the customers are inevitably irate even when it's not my fault. One couple tried to send a musical instrument to a foreign country. They requested a specific provider but it turned out that provider wouldn't send instruments abroad due to limited liability. And despite me telling them, they were clearly ticked off at *me*, as if I had made this decision myself.
Furthermore, I don't even think any of my co-workers genuinely like me. Not in a "they actually hate me" way, and I don't care if this sounds paranoid, but I have heard at least one of my co-workers call me slow when she thought I wasn't listening. Furthermore, my supervisor thinks I'm incompetent because I was late for a shift that wasn't put on my schedule. She won't say it outright but I can tell from her mannerisms and patronising comments that she doesn't think I deserve to be advanced any further. So I end up marooned in a barely-worthwhile job, isolated whilst my other co-workers talk between themselves and organize parties and get-togethers.
Family is OK, no issues with my parents and younger brother but I barely even see my brother anymore because he's always at his girlfriend's house. I'm not looking for a relationship but it's hard not to be envious seeing everything he can do. He can drive, he can easily afford holidays, while I'm here way, way behind. I've just given up any hope that this will ever get better. I know for a fact it won't - the job market is too cutthroat and there's barely any local positions so quitting my job will just lead to me running out of money. I can't bear with this anymore.
For starters, I failed college, yet again. I had failed college a few times before, but I had failed the first year by only one unit, so they allowed me to move into the second year while completing the outstanding unit simultaneously. That was a very bad mistake on my part, as obviously most of my classmates this year had all been together the previous year, so they probably saw me as an interloper and completely shut me out (EDIT: Should have mentioned this was after two years since my last attempt at college - this wasn't my first-year classmates). The course was very dense so I was hoping to converse with classmates, but they shut down every attempt on my part to strike a conversation, and even though I gave them my phone number, they wouldn't add me to their WhatsApp group. So at times it was literally impossible to try to organize group projects outside of the class because I could not get in contact with them. Eventually I gave up and I've been told I've failed the most important part of the course, so no chance of me graduating.
My job is barely more palatable. I work in some small grocery shop with a post office attached to it, and I work both. And to add to that, I'm meant to do everything else behind the till as well, such as clean the bakery and hot-food sections, clean the oven, stock any cigarettes and spirits, and you have to do this while customers are waiting to be served. Maybe some people can do this, but I always end up feeling behind. And the customers are inevitably irate even when it's not my fault. One couple tried to send a musical instrument to a foreign country. They requested a specific provider but it turned out that provider wouldn't send instruments abroad due to limited liability. And despite me telling them, they were clearly ticked off at *me*, as if I had made this decision myself.
Furthermore, I don't even think any of my co-workers genuinely like me. Not in a "they actually hate me" way, and I don't care if this sounds paranoid, but I have heard at least one of my co-workers call me slow when she thought I wasn't listening. Furthermore, my supervisor thinks I'm incompetent because I was late for a shift that wasn't put on my schedule. She won't say it outright but I can tell from her mannerisms and patronising comments that she doesn't think I deserve to be advanced any further. So I end up marooned in a barely-worthwhile job, isolated whilst my other co-workers talk between themselves and organize parties and get-togethers.
Family is OK, no issues with my parents and younger brother but I barely even see my brother anymore because he's always at his girlfriend's house. I'm not looking for a relationship but it's hard not to be envious seeing everything he can do. He can drive, he can easily afford holidays, while I'm here way, way behind. I've just given up any hope that this will ever get better. I know for a fact it won't - the job market is too cutthroat and there's barely any local positions so quitting my job will just lead to me running out of money. I can't bear with this anymore.
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