Right now I'd be too scared to do it but I know I will have the motivation to do it soon enough due to how shitty my life is. Sometimes I feel like I have this sort of manic anger to end my life so that I don't have to suffer. This anger ironically comes from pro lifers and suicide preventionists. If it wasn't for them, I don't think I'd ever jump. Their attempts to keep me alive so that they can inflict their bullshit, vile pro suffering agenda upon me makes me want to ctb even more and it's with this motivation of escaping this shitty world that would make me jump