BipolarGuy
Enlightened
- Aug 6, 2020
- 1,456
I was planning to end my life on Saturday (yesterday) night, although I moved that to Monday or Tuesday night.
If my original plan had gone ahead, I would have been dead for over 24 hours at time of writing.
However yesterday morning, on the same day I was originally going to end my life, I received a message from somebody offering me a very good job. This happened on a Saturday too, of all days.
This was a position I interviewed for in 2019! The guy has issues with various things - long story.
I was in a state of shock, and still am if I'm honest.
I was so sure I was going to dead by now, if not in a day or two.
This may not work out.
I am meeting the guy again on Tuesday to discuss.
I also have other issues such as actually being able to afford to travel to work before building up a steady income - I've been out of work for a while feeling depressed/suicidal.
So by no means am I 'saved'.
But given what has happened, I am mainly engaging with some trusted people via PMs, rather than getting involved in most threads as I usually would. I'll make the odd post, but please excuse me being less active than normal.
I am totally exhausted.
I was so sure I was going to be dead this week.
I still may be by the end of it.....but we'll see.
For now, there is hope.
If my original plan had gone ahead, I would have been dead for over 24 hours at time of writing.
However yesterday morning, on the same day I was originally going to end my life, I received a message from somebody offering me a very good job. This happened on a Saturday too, of all days.
This was a position I interviewed for in 2019! The guy has issues with various things - long story.
I was in a state of shock, and still am if I'm honest.
I was so sure I was going to dead by now, if not in a day or two.
This may not work out.
I am meeting the guy again on Tuesday to discuss.
I also have other issues such as actually being able to afford to travel to work before building up a steady income - I've been out of work for a while feeling depressed/suicidal.
So by no means am I 'saved'.
But given what has happened, I am mainly engaging with some trusted people via PMs, rather than getting involved in most threads as I usually would. I'll make the odd post, but please excuse me being less active than normal.
I am totally exhausted.
I was so sure I was going to be dead this week.
I still may be by the end of it.....but we'll see.
For now, there is hope.