Euphoria from partial hanging

[OnMyLast Legs]

Something strange just happened. I put the noose around my neck and knelt down in my closet, putting significant pressure on my neck. When I stood up I felt a pleasurable sensation throughout my body and it scared me.

It felt good, and I hated it because it felt good. The break from my usual misery seemed unwarranted. The incongruity of mind and sensation seemed wrong and I wanted it to end.

I imagine fading into unconsciousness but a blood choke produces a strange exhilaration that disrupts it.

Has anyone else experienced this?

P.S. I am taking this as a sign that partial is viable. I think I have a spot and a position.

Edit: Oh man. The tingliness in extremities is intense. Good news is I've found the sweet spot but holy crap, this is not going to sleep. Hanging is a painful death. Then how do so many people do it? Maybe you only feel it after you abort the attempt.

 

[insectontrial]

Yep, been there. I had the exact same feeling as you when I first attempted it.

 

[DeathByBananabread]

Shocked that people here don't know about autoerotic asphyxiation, but I guess that's not really a normal thing to know about, is it?

It's not uncommon for hanging to the point of almost passing out to do that, some people chase it sexually, it's lead to a few accidental deaths. I'm not entirely sure how it works or why, or how people pull it off consistently, I just know of the concept, it was used as a joke (later played seriously) in BoJack Horseman.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

@DeathByBananabread I've heard of it, I guess I thought you had to be doing something sexual already. But I have heard the legend of the mandrake--hanged men often ejaculate, which some said led to little human plants sprouting up.

I just didn't expect hanging to involve such a rush. In martial arts they just refer to going to sleep, but then again those guys are stressed and struggling.

Forget FSH. If I successfully cut off blood flow with partial, which it now looks like I can do, I'm going to be slammed with a physical sensation.

I'm happy to have found a good partial position, but the plot thickens!

 

[insectontrial]

I'll admit it unsettled me to begin with as well. On the Internet you often read or hear stories of people who survived attempts. I watched a video about a man who survived jumping from the Golden Gate Bridge, and he said he felt instant regret. Whereas when I attempted a partial hanging, I didn't feel any regret at all - quite the opposite, a pleasant feeling in fact, almost like my brain was telling me I was doing the right thing.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

I'll admit it unsettled me to begin with as well. On the Internet you often read or hear stories of people who survived attempts. I watched a video about a man who survived jumping from the Golden Gate Bridge, and he said he felt instant regret. Whereas when I attempted a partial hanging, I didn't feel any regret at all - quite the opposite, a pleasant feeling in fact, almost like my brain was telling me I was doing the right thing.

The crazy thing is that the pleasantness is what alarmed me. It felt like I was out of touch with reality. I wanted to go back to feeling like shit, fall asleep that way, and never wake up. I've become comfortable in my misery.

 

[insectontrial]

I think I understand - for me, it felt like I'd had an epiphany that all the anti-suicide campaigns and charities were incorrect in their approach. They always say it gets better, that survivors regret it, and that suicide is something we have a duty to prevent. And yet there I was, feeling no regret or panic at all.

It's a genuine relief to know I'm not the only person who is critical of such campaigns, and that this place exists.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

I think I understand - for me, it felt like I'd had an epiphany that all the anti-suicide campaigns and charities were incorrect in their approach. They always say it gets better, that survivors regret it, and that suicide is something we have a duty to prevent. And yet there I was, feeling no regret or panic at all.

It's a genuine relief to know I'm not the only person who is critical of such campaigns, and that this place exists.

I felt crazy regret, but not because I wanted to live in any explicit way. It was such a strange experience. I guess the closest thing to a coherent thought is that I didn't deserve to feel that good.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

My mom's coming at the end of the week. An old friend is coming to town with his band too. I have a job coming up that I can't do. The walls really seem to be closing in. Now is the time to CTB but I'm so, so scared. I worry about hell. There, I said it. What a terrible state of mind I'm in. Suicidal for 6mo, losing all function, couch or bed rotting all day doomscrolling, and I fear my wretched soul will live on in even worse (much worse) pain if I end it. I have to get over this.

 

[sadgirl1997]

My mom's coming at the end of the week. An old friend is coming to town with his band too. I have a job coming up that I can't do. The walls really seem to be closing in. Now is the time to CTB but I'm so, so scared. I worry about hell. There, I said it. What a terrible state of mind I'm in. Suicidal for 6mo, losing all function, couch or bed rotting all day doomscrolling, and I fear my wretched soul will live on in even worse (much worse) pain if I end it. I have to get over this.

I'm sorry you don't deserve this pain. Sending love to you friend. Everything will be okay no matter what.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

So many famous people have done it. It can't be that hard. Find the right spot and you're out. Cmon big guy. Let's get it done.

 

[insectontrial]

I ended up having the exact same feeling this evening, too, when I went out for a walk across a bridge not far from where I live and looked down into the river. I think I am getting closer to acting upon my thoughts, especially now that I know my brain and body nether fear the act nor the consequences.

 

[theDunce]

Something strange just happened. I put the noose around my neck and knelt down in my closet, putting significant pressure on my neck. When I stood up I felt a pleasurable sensation throughout my body and it scared me.

It felt good, and I hated it because it felt good. The break from my usual misery seemed unwarranted. The incongruity of mind and sensation seemed wrong and I wanted it to end.

I imagine fading into unconsciousness but a blood choke produces a strange exhilaration that disrupts it.

Has anyone else experienced this?

P.S. I am taking this as a sign that partial is viable. I think I have a spot and a position.

Edit: Oh man. The tingliness in extremities is intense. Good news is I've found the sweet spot but holy crap, this is not going to sleep. Hanging is a painful death. Then how do so many people do it? Maybe you only feel it after you abort the attempt.

as a kid I would do the carotid choke after hyperventilating. you would pass out for a few seconds which would feel like hours and wake up to the euphoric dream state of feelings that happen when you come back to life.

that's the thing about really doing it is you won't get that euphoria when you don't come back to life.

I have also woken up during a partial hanging after being completely out, so I question if a partial can do the job. I guess I would worry about the possibility of waking up too late and having other issues come about because of it. after that partial I realized that kicking out the chair might be the only way to stop SI or natural body reactions that happen even when passed out.

 

[Worndown]

Those who die from autoerotic asphyxiation likely just rode the wave too long.
A little felt good, a little more will feel better. Push it a bit further.
Oh my, I am dead.
It is a tactic to avoid SI, even when unintended.

 

[xXSufferingXx]

Something strange just happened. I put the noose around my neck and knelt down in my closet, putting significant pressure on my neck. When I stood up I felt a pleasurable sensation throughout my body and it scared me.

It felt good, and I hated it because it felt good. The break from my usual misery seemed unwarranted. The incongruity of mind and sensation seemed wrong and I wanted it to end.

I imagine fading into unconsciousness but a blood choke produces a strange exhilaration that disrupts it.

Has anyone else experienced this?

P.S. I am taking this as a sign that partial is viable. I think I have a spot and a position.

Edit: Oh man. The tingliness in extremities is intense. Good news is I've found the sweet spot but holy crap, this is not going to sleep. Hanging is a painful death. Then how do so many people do it? Maybe you only feel it after you abort the attempt.

wait, im confused. you said it made you feel great, but in the end you mention hanging is a painful death?

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

wait, im confused. you said it made you feel great, but in the end you mention hanging is a painful death?

Good point. I'd say it's a physically intense death. Maybe you could interpret closing your carotids as a pleasurable feeling. But like sex/masturbation you have to feel up to it. I just want to go to sleep.

 

[Worndown]

They likely read one of the "troll" posts on the terrible pain.
Done well, you feel pressure, not pain.

 

[xXSufferingXx]

Good point. I'd say it's a physically intense death. Maybe you could interpret closing your carotids as a pleasurable feeling. But like sex/masturbation you have to feel up to it. I just want to go to sleep.

oh ok i gotcha. i was just trying to understand. how long would you say the "high" (so to speak) lasted?

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

oh ok i gotcha. i was just trying to understand. how long would you say the "high" (so to speak) lasted?

5 seconds?

 

[xXSufferingXx]

5 seconds?

ok interesting. i have never done a test or practice like that

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

I just got it again. Hanging experts, how close is the rush to unconsciousness?

I kneel into partial, feel the squeeze, abort, and get the rush. How many more seconds until lights out?

Those who die from autoerotic asphyxiation likely just rode the wave too long.
A little felt good, a little more will feel better. Push it a bit further.
Oh my, I am dead.
It is a tactic to avoid SI, even when unintended.

If it can happen accidentally, surely it's within reach.

 

[Steph99]

The euphoric feeling is the sign you've hit the sweet spot. It is crazy how easily and pleasantly you slip away when hitting the sweet spot. I was so close to dying when I was doing a practice with no intent to die then.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

The euphoric feeling is the sign you've hit the sweet spot. It is crazy how easily and pleasantly you slip away when hitting the sweet spot. I was so close to dying when I was doing a practice with no intent to die then.

Encouraging, but I wonder if I'm cutting off blood flow or just reducing it.

 

[favouriteworstnight]

the feeling is good but i didn't have the guts not to stand up, i'm doing full but i hope alcohol helps

 

[5417807]

Be careful with testing this method because it is visible if you go beyond a point.
You can get black eyes/dark circles around eyes and petechiae (blood vessels in the skin and eye burst and leave brusing which can take a while to go away). It can take a few days to a couple weeks depending on your body and level of damage.
This is very noticeable for anyone who is trained to spot domestic abuse and drug abuse specifically.
there isnt an easy way of explaining it away

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

Be careful with testing this method because it is visible if you go beyond a point.
You can get black eyes/dark circles around eyes and petechiae (blood vessels in the skin and eye burst and leave brusing which can take a while to go away). It can take a few days to a couple weeks depending on your body and level of damage.
This is very noticeable for anyone who is trained to spot domestic abuse and drug abuse specifically.
there isnt an easy way of explaining it away

This is smart advice. But I've never had this problem. Tells you how serious my attempts have been.