Discussion Does anyone feel like the only way to finally stop thinking about suicide is to actually do it?

[dogemn]

I'm tired of feeling mental pain every day and constantly thinking about suicide, it's become a hell of its own. It feels like the only way to stop these thoughts is to actually do it once and for all.

 

[slitwristsbleedcold]

if only I had the guts to do so

 

[Greasyhair]

Yes, definitely as there isn't plausible scenario where it would stop by any other reason. You are not alone.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Why do you wanna die? Why are you suicidal? What makes you suicidal? What causes the mental pain?

If the issues could be solved, would you still be suicidal?

In my case, external circumstances made me suicidal. For now, my situation hasn't become worse, hence I'm less suicidal.

 

[itsgone2]

Why do you wanna die? Why are you suicidal? What makes you suicidal? What causes the mental pain?

If the issues could be solved, would you still be suicidal?

In my case, external circumstances made me suicidal. For now, my situation hasn't become worse, hence I'm less suicidal.

External circumstances brought me to this situation too. I can't let others continue to be subjected to this. Something has to change

 

[fromange]

Yes. My brain is constantly telling me to kill myself and it doesn't turn off. Idgaf anymore. Is the pro con dichotomy biased towards suicide because there's no existing at that point, to regret it? It's kinda like Benatar's asymmetry of existence and suffering in anti-natalism. By definition you can regret not ctb but cannot regret ctb. I know dying isn't the same as not being born from the start, because there's an opportunity cost of potentially being happy alive (pull), and also the pain while dying and risk of failure (push). I love nature, and I know there are beautiful sights and animals and plants out there I've yet to experience. But is that a reason to endure this agony every minute of the day, for how long? It's not like being alive is constant [thing to look forward to] either. Most of the time you're working a bs job.

Idk... I'm just so tired. I want a break. I just want to pause the game, and maybe ctb is only that, but I'm scared of being punished if I ctb. I'm such a coward running from life and death at the same time.

 

[itsgone2]

I'm tired of feeling mental pain every day and constantly thinking about suicide, it's become a hell of its own. It feels like the only way to stop these thoughts is to actually do it once and for all.

I didn't really consider the title of this thread when I first replied. But I was just thinking, if I'm actually going to do this, why not tonight? I'll have a large window where no one expects to hear from me. If I'm serious then get it done. Fear of the act and the pain could stop me but then I should quit considering it.

 

[fromange]

I didn't really consider the title of this thread when I first replied. But I was just thinking, if I'm actually going to do this, why not tonight? I'll have a large window where no one expects to hear from me. If I'm serious then get it done. Fear of the act and the pain could stop me but then I should quit considering it.

This is me. I feel like I'm forgetting something, but idk. From my pov it shouldn't matter if I leave letters or clean my room or close out online accounts because I won't experience anything, strictly scientifically. It just feels like... It's too early? If that makes sense. But also that's another fallacy reasoning that has an unfair bias towards living this time (following what I said above), if you say "it might get better."

99% of gamblers suicidals quit ctb right before they hit big become happy. Lol.

There was someone in my city looking for a buddy. I didn't reach out but I don't have a good reason why I didn't.

 

[itsgone2]

This is me. I feel like I'm forgetting something, but idk. From my pov it shouldn't matter if I leave letters or clean my room or close out online accounts because I won't experience anything, strictly scientifically. It just feels like... It's too early? If that makes sense. But also that's another fallacy reasoning that has an unfair bias towards living this time (following what I said above), if you say "it might get better."

99% of gamblers suicidals quit ctb right before they hit big become happy. Lol.

There was someone in my city looking for a buddy. I didn't reach out but I don't have a good reason why I didn't.

I agree with all of this, except for part of being too early. I'm fine with that part, I'm older than most here. I've done most of the financial prep work, to the best I can figure.
I'm tired of the mental pain. I think about it every day. But like many others here i can't follow through.

 

[jatty]

This is me. I feel like I'm forgetting something, but idk. From my pov it shouldn't matter if I leave letters or clean my room or close out online accounts because I won't experience anything, strictly scientifically. It just feels like... It's too early? If that makes sense. But also that's another fallacy reasoning that has an unfair bias towards living this time (following what I said above), if you say "it might get better."

99% of gamblers suicidals quit ctb right before they hit big become happy. Lol.

There was someone in my city looking for a buddy. I didn't reach out but I don't have a good reason why I didn't.

I love your philosophy haha
I relate to everyone here, thinking about ctb has become its own personal hell, i just want to die, and i know that when i die realistically its like i was never born.

I dont know. I dont get it. I just want.. suicide therapy? To help me through these thoughts. Because im not sure whats exactly holding me back but i hate it. I want to digest more suicide worldviews but it seems my brain is rejecting it. But i want to have someone tell me suicidal reasoning and fallacies.
Unfortunately that is extremely hard to find outside of our lovely pessimist antinatalist authors (love you ligotti)

Maybe im hanging because of hope. I dont know. I hate hope.

 

[fromange]

I love your philosophy haha
I relate to everyone here, thinking about ctb has become its own personal hell, i just want to die, and i know that when i die realistically its like i was never born.

I dont know. I dont get it. I just want.. suicide therapy? To help me through these thoughts. Because im not sure whats exactly holding me back but i hate it. I want to digest more suicide worldviews but it seems my brain is rejecting it. But i want to have someone tell me suicidal reasoning and fallacies.
Unfortunately that is extremely hard to find outside of our lovely pessimist antinatalist authors (love you ligotti)

Maybe im hanging because of hope. I dont know. I hate hope.

Ah I'm just rambling. I get it though. It might be helpful to write out all the reasons why you want to ctb, and all the reasons why you haven't yet. I can't tell anyone irl about my thoughts so this community has been a blessing for me.