Discussion Do you talk to people about your suicidal ideation?

[grapevoid]

I am curious
- Have you/do you discuss your feelings or plans about suicide with anyone close to you?
- If you have/do, how do the people around you react?

I have openly discussed my suicidal ideation and with many people close to me in the past, especially when I had just been released from the hospital after a failed attempt. Even while in my outpatient program and being very vulnerable with people close to me most people acted as if it was a joke. So, I am not curious others experience with this.

 

[CravingPeace]

I talked about it with my outpatient therapist and she talked me into a voluntary wellness check, which I then spent 6 days in a psych ward after. I've lost my ability to purchase firearms because of this and lost significant amount of money which is a leading factor of my ideation. I will never talk about it in the real world again

 

[Jorvak]

I Agree love is not just about words but actions! If I had a depressed kid Id do everything in my power to help them

Absolutely! On that note, I've put considerable amount of thought into how i would raise children, and i know i would want to do everything to empower them in every way possible, intellectually, emotionally, psychologically. and with useful skills. I would always try to find ways to support them and analyze the root of the issue to address it directly, if they became depressed. I've considered slightly different approaches to young boys and girls, and LGBTQ children as well. I would teach them to not judge their self-worth according to the arbitrary societal standards we live under, or according to social-cliques, but to develop their own sense of worth, according to ethical values built on a foundation of human dignity and anti-oppression, how much they stand up for and support other people, their interest, their hobbies. and their dignity as a person. Why does it take an autistic person to consider these factors that so many allistic people who are supposedly "more emotionally supportive" so easily miss and never consider?

 

[MatrixPrisoner]

Absolutely. Very matter-of-factly, too. I don't understand why it should be a taboo topic of conversation. Anyone that looks down upon suicide or see's it as bizzarre is either just plain moronic or in pure denial IMO. We live in a world ran by criminals and demons. We're all pitted against each other in it. There are only 2 choices. Become a slave to this system and work to keep the criminals fed or take ourselves out this system. It's all pointless - and in the end, we end up dying anyways.

I'm even more vocal about anti-natalism. I promote this ideology as much as I can whenever I'm around people. I like to get people to consider that having children isn't something you should haphazardly do or feel pressured by society to do. Because the fact of the matter is, 99% of people that procreate are giving birth to a lifetime of problems. I don't think enough prospective parents stop to truly think about this. I get weird reactions and looks sometimes, but IDGAF. I know that deep down they're only uncomfortable and offended because they see some truth to it.

If my preaching can prevent even one child from being born into a lifetime of suffering, I feel like I have done a great service. We need to stop rewarding this toxic and shitty planet with more suffering people to perpetuate this shitty and pointless system, so that a small population of elites can have worker bees to do their bidding..

Abstain...
...use protection
...pull out...
...plan B
...whatever it takes. We need to do ourselves and our unborn children a favor by not procreating.

 

[WanderingTiger]

I don't tell anyone close to me or who I have contact with outside the internet about this for fear of being hospitalised or labelled as an ungrateful lunatic. Online, I tend to vent about it in this forum, and I shared my plans and methods with my only online friend yesterday. Today, he told me that he thinks suicidal people are cowardly and foolish, unable to solve their problems, and that they deserve to be mistreated in hospitals, as if I hadn't even touched on the subject of wanting to die with him. I just feel that he doesn't understand the complexity of it all.

 

[grapevoid]

I don't tell anyone close to me or who I have contact with outside the internet about this for fear of being hospitalised or labelled as an ungrateful lunatic. Online, I tend to vent about it in this forum, and I shared my plans and methods with my only online friend yesterday. Today, he told me that he thinks suicidal people are cowardly and foolish, unable to solve their problems, and that they deserve to be mistreated in hospitals, as if I hadn't even touched on the subject of wanting to die with him. I just feel that he doesn't understand the complexity of it all.

Says the cowardly internet friend who is too weak to have real compassion. I can't stand people.

 

[futurecorpse]

- Have you/do you discuss your feelings or plans about suicide with anyone close to you?
- If you have/do, how do the people around you react?

Yes. My dad, sister, and therapist know I'm suicidal, but they don't know my plan. My dad had a few different responses, so it makes me feel conflicted. My sister said I have to be here and she needs me, but idgaf about her. She had her chance to make things right. And my therapist is saddened to hear me say I'm suicidal, but she said she's not going to try to sway me to stay alive. Nowadays she just sits there during our sessions because she doesn't know what to say when I tell her I want to ctb. She suggested calling for a welfare check and that pissed me off. She's a lovely woman tho so I won't hold it against her

 

[maplebar]

I am curious
- Have you/do you discuss your feelings or plans about suicide with anyone close to you?
- If you have/do, how do the people around you react?

I have openly discussed my suicidal ideation and with many people close to me in the past, especially when I had just been released from the hospital after a failed attempt. Even while in my outpatient program and being very vulnerable with people close to me most people acted as if it was a joke. So, I am not curious others experience with this.

Ive only ever joked about it with friends
And then that results in them probably jokingly encouraging, which sometimes i take to heart
But ive never told anyone my serious plans, i just think about it all the time

 

[manicstreetbeeper]

not now. i don't think other people can or should be trusted for that. i'd only talk to someone now if i were 100 percent certain they'd actually understand and empathize.

 

[WanderingTiger]

Says the cowardly internet friend who is too weak to have real compassion. I can't stand people.

I understand, sometimes it irritates me how people only view life with positivity and lack compassion for the pain of others simply because they have been too privileged to notice all of this. I no longer feel the desire or need to be with people or to be part of this selfish and terrible society; I have the urge to live isolated from everything, here is the only place that truly understands how things really work.

 

[blacksand]

I used to talk to my one remaining friend but he slowly ghosted me. We used to share a lot of this stuff but after being given a nepotism law firm job he likes to think of himself as a corporate rockstar type now and looks down at me.

 

[grapevoid]

Not anymore. I am very impulsive so sometimes I mention it to whoever I might be involved with at the time but I regret doing so as it's difficult for them and only alienates them and makes the dynamic worse.

I have lost a lot of friends in the period when I was vocal about my suicidal thoughts. I keep them to myself now and, when they are too much, I come to this forum. I was institutionalized once and it was one of the worst and most traumatic things to ever happen to me. I promised to myself I'd never discuss it with anyone ever again and I'm going to hold onto that until I'm dead, be it now or several decades down the line. I make exceptions when other people talk to me about their own suicidal ideation/intentions. I know how important it is to know you are safe sharing it with somebody, but I try to be both honest and impersonal about it -- I frame it as something I've been through but not as something I am still experiencing.

I agree with being stuck in a hospital/psych ward being highly traumatic. I have experienced quite a bit of trauma the past 10 years, especially when leaving my abusive ex and still would rate being hospitalized for my mental health in the top 5 most traumatic events of my life. The psychiatrist also deemed me "too combative to accept treatment" which complicated and prolonged my stay. It was genuinely awful.
Just to clarify, I was not too combative to accept treatment, and did accept treatment. I refused their initial attempts at new medications and ketamine therapy because I was still processing my failed attempt and didn't want to change medications or do ketamine therapy in a place I felt so uncomfortable and anxious.