I regret the decisions that led me to this point more than anything else, perhaps I wouldn't have ended up in this deplorable emotional state. Stopping my reckless suicide attempts gave me the opportunity to experience wonderful things, but being stuck in a place that makes me so anxious, nervous, and tired takes its toll. I am exhausted, I regret not using the time that I impose on myself well, because the longer I extend my life span, more drained I'll feel and more pain I'll cause to my friends who are aware of this but cannot do anything.