Venting do Any girls find it difficult to connect with other girls??? ?

[47a920]

I can't say I have ever experienced having a big close friend group of girls who do fun cute things together and it makes me feel left out. I only truly have my best friend who I love dearly who has been with me since I was a kid, but we both had vastly different childhoods and interests so we still never really related to each other.

My main point is that I have tried to befriend a bunch of other girls over the years and it never works out because they don't enjoy speaking to me for reasons that I was never able to figure out. I just don't understand y because these people always act enthusiastic to speak to me over social media but as soon as I initiate a real conversation between us, they don't respond lol. Even with girls who share similar interests, it is always this same exact situation every single time

I don't want anyone to feel like they r forced to talk to me every day or be pushy But I just don't exactly see the point in pretending that u like me if u don't, especially when they talk about needing more friends, only to get ignored when i make conversation ^_^"

 

[lovelove416]

I can relate to this deeply as someone with autism. What helps is finding groups based off your interests. If you like theatre join a musical. If you like religion join a church. Maybe ask that friend to introduce you to other people? It is somewhat tragic to have never experienced the beautiful girlhood so many others had. I think being social in general is healthy and gender isn't too important as long as your connections are positive.

 

[47a920]

I can relate to this deeply as someone with autism. What helps is finding groups based off your interests. If you like theatre join a musical. If you like religion join a church. Maybe ask that friend to introduce you to other people? It is somewhat tragic to have never experienced the beautiful girlhood so many others had. I think being social in general is healthy and gender isn't too important as long as your connections are positive.

i will keep trying, gonna put myself out there as much as i can comfortably plus i will try to be more optimistic about making friends this year which will help a lot i think. and i'm also autistic so Thank U so much for saying this ^_^

 

[chaibea]

I just don't understand y because these people always act enthusiastic to speak to me over social media but as soon as I initiate a real conversation between us, they don't respond lol. Even with girls who share similar interests, it is always this same exact situation every single time

Felt that. Honestly I think it has something to do with modern times; most people struggle maintaining real connections now, no matter the gender. I can imagine it's especially harder for us as women because of societal pressures we have been groomed into following since we were kids. Plus, social media surely doesn't seem to be helping. It seems to make it easier for us to judge each other

 

[hampster123]

i've always been uncomfortable trying to befriend girls because i'm a lesbian and don't want them to get the wrong idea but in general i feel like people can sense there's something off about me like i'm an alien or something

 

[47a920]

Felt that. Honestly I think it has something to do with modern times; most people struggle maintaining real connections now, no matter the gender. I can imagine it's especially harder for us as women because of societal pressures we have been groomed into following since we were kids. Plus, social media surely doesn't seem to be helping. It seems to make it easier for us to judge each other

i really agree with this since another thing i've always noticed is that if i do get to the real friendship stage, they always distance themselves once there's a boyfriend in the picture which makes me feel completely used. Even worse when majority of our conversations are about their relationship afterwards. This seems to be super common for a lot of other people too though, so i don't really know what to do about it besides ending the friendship (probably would be the best decision considering once they no longer are in a relationship, they usually will want to rekindle but of course only until they have a new partner), and that puts me right back to square one

i've always been uncomfortable trying to befriend girls because i'm a lesbian and don't want them to get the wrong idea but in general i feel like people can sense there's something off about me like i'm an alien or something

not sure if i seem ignorant by saying this or anything so i'm really sorry if it sounds like that but i am bisexual myself and very open about it too which makes me anxious about complimenting or being affectionate towards my friends in the same way that others are for fear that they will think i'm creepy or wanting something out of them. It is just never ur fault for feeling like this at all as ur clearly being respectful. There r simply too many people who really do think this way for no good reason besides shitty arrogance and homophobia. Completely valid but don't let that stop u from making good friends, u deserve it

 

[violetforever]

yes and it's probably because i care a great difference what girls think of me than what guys do. i feel like talking to guys is easy. you just have to be a girl. my interactions with most of them don't mean much to me. they're so often one dimensional. it's great but rare when i can genuinely befriend a man. i can easily get on with my day if one doesn't get along with me. it's not the same with girls though. i guess since i am a girl i just naturally want to fit in and be liked by other girls. i don't know how to befriend them. i feel like i'm not interesting enough or that i'll say something offensive by accident. even when i think back to friends i did have (all my friends irl have only been girls), i don't even know how the friendship began or what they saw in me. how do i not know how to casually interact with my own gender that i prefer lol?