Discussion Are you angry at your parents for making you born?

[likeblueberries]

Angry is too strong a word but I simply don't understand why having me; they were not together before I was born and failed at getting back together multiple times during my childhood, I think that should have made clear what would come next. I'm not sad I wasn't aborted like my mom has clarified I could have been, but I think it would have been better for everyone if I had been, including myself.

I mean if you're considering aborting for one reason or another then you probably should do it, since you're already aware you're bringing a kid into a poor environment for development.

 

[DeathByBananabread]

If they were good parents, no, but...

-and I always get pushback or someone fighting me when I say that. Maybe they weren't the worst, but their best lead me here. So be it.

 

[catsalvation]

Maybe resentment because they just made me born (esp. father) to use me as a tool, a slave and abused me severely.

 

[Sardinha]

no.... honestly im actually grateful to them for giving me the chance to live as a human. i think humanity is this cruelly beautiful thing even though i hate it at the same time. the resentment i have toward my parents is about specific things they did or ways they think — but about the fact that i was born? no.. the issues I deal with nowadays are mostly the result of stuff I did or didn't do, so that's on me. my parents just influenced some of it

 

[HowlingCoyote]

i really am. especially because my dad left pretty soon after i was born, and my mom was very unequipped to have children, let alone 3 others besides me. we didnt have enough money, it was neglectful, and traumatic. i wish she never had me. sometimes im grateful i can experience what i have, sometimes i think the hardships made me sturdy and tough, but then sometimes i become tired and weary and i just dont want to deal with it anymore.

 

[death over slavery]

When they push me on the very edge, I pull out my trump card of telling them I shouldn't have been born.

I don't even know if my birth was on accident. Poor family planning and were the major reasons why I'm in a bad mental state. "Angry" is an understatement.

 

[doomedbynarrative]

My mother was so close to breaking up with my father because he wasn't a great person and got suckered into going to a Halloween party and one thing led to another and bam, I was conceived. My father wanted an abortion. My mother got it into her head that she could raise me and I would be the one good thing in her life of trauma. And then kept my father around for so many years despite the fact that he did nothing to help raise me and became dangerous to live with.

We can see how that all turned out lol

Lack of responsibility and bad decisions combined with some warped idea of what children are for and well... *gestures at my life*

I don't resent them but it makes me sad. I could have been spared everything if my mother had just said no.

 

[fedup1982]

I dont know if resentful is quite the right word. I'm angry, but I don't hold a grudge. It's just bad fortune. Sure, my parents weren't fit parents. Unfortunately nobody had the sense to tell them they shouldn't breed

 

[alstroemeria55]

I can't say I feel resentful, but I wish I hadn't been born into this existence. My mother just wanted children and did not have the foresight that I would be born into a broken home and a doomed future. I'm mostly sad for my lost childhood and endless emotional trauma that the neglect set off.

 

[nitrogenous]

I'm furious at them, because it taught me how unfair life is. Even my therapist felt sorry for me, said how my parents are basically "terrorists" and how my family is like "hell". She felt so sorry for me, that I was so "unlucky" to be born in my family. I think that shows how horrible it is. I'm so mad at them for not only making me feel like shit, but also for ruining my life (making me lost my job, etc).

 

[MonochromeMind]

Yes.

 

[tired_fever]

No. My dad is dead (heh) and I don't feel anything towards him. Mother is nice, she is genuinely a decent parent, but I am still unable to feel much attachment. The starting point she provided me with could've been better, but it's actually kinda nice as it is. I've realized that I'm the only one who keeps sabotaging my life, and it feels wrong to blame it on her. Maybe she could've been better by noticing it and trying to do something, but I don't even want her to, so I guess she's still pretty good.

 

[orpheus_]

No, they are both genuinely good people who generally enjoy life and they just don't understand some things. I'm just really sorry for them that they got a child like me.

 

[fadedghost]

Do you hold any resentment towards them for having you? Maybe "resentment" is too harsh of a word, but every time I think about it I'm like "man, fuck you guys. why'd you even have me?"

i'm angry for them having me when they were older and for mom using legal drugs (but still drugs, including alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, and pain killers) during the pregnancy and my dad not stopping her. does that count? no?

 

[rainatthebusstop]

My mother often says "You know, I'm glad I didn't abort you?"

Guess what I am not,

 

[BlendedHeart]

My mother could've been more. Could've been a doctor, an historian like she sometimes say she'd like. She could've learned another language. She could've traveled.

Instead she had me. I'm an anchor, a burden. I'm pretty sure she's disappointed I didn't get married and formed my own family, but she tries her best to hide it.

I'm not angry at her. Sometimes, in my worst moments, I just think she could've done better without me.

 

[Quantum_Marten0302]

Yes i am very angry at them. I think life can be beautiful and amazing but they stole that possibility from me with their inability to raise a child

 

[Trilly]

Yes. They abused me and treated me like shit. They are dead to me, especially my mother.

 

[Fadenself00]

I really understand and I personally find it so horrific how people would actually choose to impose something as torturous and dreadful as existence onto others causing all this terrible suffering as a result and existing in the first place is the true cause of all suffering, the fact that this existence was imposed truly is the most terrible tragedy.

To me existence itself will always be a mistake and I wish that more than anything I was never burdened with this existence as every second is torture to exist, to me procreation is something so terrible and dreadful, it feels criminal to me to force one into this torturous and futile existence of unnecessary suffering that there was never a need for at all where the option to peacefully cease existing is denied.

It truly is the most evil world where suicide is made into a crime with pro-lifers doing all they can to imprision others in this existence, there's so much horrific extreme cruelty in how even know this existence was imposed the suffering and torture of existing is seen as to force and prolong no matter what, to exist really is a terrible punishment that just causes harm and suffering, all that existence ever does is just torture existing beings with no limit as to how much agony one can feel, there's just so much evil in existing.

The biggest issue - with us humans - for sure is how we are not allowed to decide for ourselves when we dont want to exist anymore. the fact that in many countries at most assisted ctb is legal, so paralyzed people have to suffer for decades, and even MAID programs can take years, is horrendous.. there should be a standardized, quick and legal procedure for adults to apply for

 

[LigottiIsRight]

I deeply lament that they decided to have a second kid, and that they were able to do so, but I don't resent them for it. I see no point on it, and they're for the most part rational people which I can respect.

 

[bobsacamano]

Well not really but they were horribly negligent in having me since my mom was old and she had already had a kid with Down's Syndrome, so really wish that would have just bottled it and spared all of us the trouble.