Venting Apparently I'm not trying

[TiredNorthStar]

I just got off a call with my mother, she asks how I'm doing, and all she can come up with is that I "Need to just try" And when I say I'm trying every day, trying to exist in this body that feels like it tortures me for the fun of it, all I get is "Are you really trying though?" Fucking hell I can't do this. Why can't people see I'm clawing at my life, dying would hurt too many people, so I have to force myself alive, but apparently I'm not even trying

 

[Infinite Solipsist]

I'm just waiting for it to come to me. In a way, I guess you can say that we all are.