Discussion Anyone who once Haf a will to live, what happened?

[m1ll1pede]

Sometimes my thoughts of wanting to kms are on and off. I'm set on the 6th due to me being home alone.

If you never had one share, but if you had what happened??

 

[thealteredmind]

little more than a year ago I took ssri for my hyper treatment resistant depression.... it kinda worked for 1-3 months... then PSSD appeared... and I lost everything.

pssd is MUCH MORE than just losing your sexual function (I actually recovered that)... but it's also losing your soul, spirit... will to live.

I'm not the same person anymore, I'm already dead. crazy to think that a medication supposed to help people can DESTROY YOU forever. and it did that to me. and pretty fast.

 

[m1dn1ghtmyst3ry]

Sometimes my thoughts of wanting to kms are on and off. I'm set on the 6th due to me being home alone.

If you never had one share, but if you had what happened??

Trauma, bullying, mental health issues, and family issues basically.

 

[m1ll1pede]

Trauma, bullying, mental health issues, and family issues basically.

Im sorry :(( it happens to the best of us

little more than a year ago I took ssri for my hyper treatment resistant depression.... it kinda worked for 1-3 months... then PSSD appeared... and I lost everything.

pssd is MUCH MORE than just losing your sexual function (I actually recovered that)... but it's also losing your soul, spirit... will to live.

I'm not the same person anymore, I'm already dead. crazy to think that a medication supposed to help people can DESTROY YOU forever. and it did that to me. and pretty fast.

What ssri did you take?

 

[ultrasharpy123456]

You know, I used to be a happy kid. I did the right things in instinct, I knew things. I was like everyone else. At school I was quiet, but at home I was loud and had fun with my siblings. We had a good bond. Then middle school happened. Ok I get through it, no biggie. Then high school happens. High school.

I want you to imagine a scenario. Ok, let's take a happy-go-lucky kid, someone who's almost like a Disney princess who's nice and kind, maybe a little shy. Now let's put them into high school filled with incredibly violent, angry, self-righteous people. And this person has to deal with the constant yelling from them. And I mean SEVERE yelling. Insults and harsh criticism with everything you do. Every day. For 4 years. Constantly. Without end. And they're too scared to stand up for themselves out of fear of being yelled at or attacked.

And when they're with their friends they have to hold in their emotions. When they come home they have to do some of homework, not too bad but a little inconvenience. And often times around the sophomore year they have to start walking home from school because they don't have transportation. And the first time they do it, they have no idea where they live. And they still have to get home. And that's not to mention the abuse they get when they go home.

Then they get to their Junior year. The Beginning of the End. I'm not quite sure what posses human beings to behave this way but this kid is forced to do this insane amounts of homework and go to all these classes that are too advanced for them to understand. And still have to pass. And that's not even mentioning the bullying. They get so scared they run in the halls just so they don't get late to class. I don't even want to mention the Senior year.

Imagine doing this for 4 years. Every single day for 4 years. Without end. And then it hits you: this is what my life is going to be from now on. This will never end.

No wonder I became suicidal.

 

[peachxgirl]

I completely relate on how you feel, I'm currently on my will to live moment. However, I've been suicidal since 2017 and partially tried to commit suicide or self-harm. However, I think the moment I lost my will is when I found out my brother suddenly passed away from cancer, and I didn't even know he had it (I live overseas, complicated childhood). I overheard my family talking about how he would beg to God every night for me to come home and visit him, asked how I was or if I was coming home, and went as far as punching himself in front of the doctors to show he was "okay" so they could send him home. After hearing that, it sent me to a spiraling grief depression I'm still battling to this day. It didn't help that a few days before he died, he texted me and I didn't take the time to talk to him. If I ever ctb, I hope it's him who I meet in the afterlife.

 

[Not A Fan]

I already had many various problems but the straw that broke my camels back was getting arrested while minding my own business, and lost my only source of honest income. The money I saved is slowly running out and once it's gone and/or the aging relative with whom I live dies, I will not have a place to go.

The only things I am good at have zero commercial value. Which isn't a bad thing. But my talent is not for survival, nor do I desire it for its own sake.

 

[dolemitedrums]

Stalker, illness, deaths of loved ones I was living for, other stuff, lions and tiger and bears oh my.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I never had a will to live to begin with

 

[Forever Sleep]

Not sure I ever had much of a will to live. I became quite attracted to death early on. Still, my coping mechanisms and senses of obligation used to work better than they do now.