Anyone here who feel guilt?

[orca87]

I read a lot about people feeling treated unfair by life.
I can relate very much to the feeling of not belonging but in fact life has been good to me.

I destroyed my own life and betrayed people. I feel guilty. I feel I could never forgive myself for ruining my life which has been good at one point and yet, I was unable to see it at that time.

Anyone feel the same and want to share stories over PM?

 

[angeliccry]

guilt is a natural reaction it seems, ive felt guilt for a number of reasons, from hurting others to hurting myself. you should take your time to acknowledge what you did wrong and slowly try to fix it, piece by piece. take your time, have some rest when needed. it'll be fine.

 

[downndone2]

I already have guilt and haven't left yet

 

[aubrey!]

Yep I'm the one who ruined my own life. I once had many friends and a happier life. I'm struggling to forgive myself - even after everyone I could reach has forgiven me. I continue to feel worse about it, but it is what I deserve.

 

[Pancake]

I think I've been given a very fortunate life and I realized that. It made me feel like I had to work harder than anyone else, but I didn't have the motivation. I felt guilty about everything I received. I feel I made many mistakes and betrayed many people that are important to me. I feel like I've ruined my own life.

 

[borderline-feline]

I feel a lot of guilt about the idea of ending my life because I would be breaking a promise that I made to my favorite person, which would make me an irredeemable subhuman.

 

[Foxes]

I read a lot about people feeling treated unfair by life.
I can relate very much to the feeling of not belonging but in fact life has been good to me.

I destroyed my own life and betrayed people. I feel guilty. I feel I could never forgive myself for ruining my life which has been good at one point and yet, I was unable to see it at that time.

Anyone feel the same and want to share stories over PM?

I can 100% relate to the feelings of guilt over how badly I've treated other people. I've had so many chances and opportunities to learn and grow from it all and I've always managed to somehow fuck everything up. I loved playing the victim card, using it as a reason and excuse to continue to treat people poorly.

It took mushrooms, LSD, and some very painful, emotional trips in order for me to make the connection that it was all my fault. You can always feel free to PM.

 

[warmsand]

i feel guilty all the time. the way i treat people isn't right and it's no wonder no one sticks around. but instead of fixing myself i let myself keep doing it and keep feeling bad for myself when i'm all alone. that's where the guilt comes from: knowing i need to change, but feeling too lazy to. i'd rather kill myself than change the way i interact with others and the way i view the world. i'd rather kill myself than get help, because i'm too weak and self-pitying.

it's my fault that my life is the way it is; other people with autism and personality disorders are normal and happy, so why can't i be? i'm just weak and lazy, that's it. it's no one elses fault but my own.

 

[orca87]

Yep I'm the one who ruined my own life. I once had many friends and a happier life. I'm struggling to forgive myself - even after everyone I could reach has forgiven me. I continue to feel worse about it, but it is what I deserve.

Pretty much sums up what I'm feeling. Cannot let go of what I've had; cannot forgive myself for ruining it

 

[Foxes]

Pretty much sums up what I'm feeling. Cannot let go of what I've had; cannot forgive myself for ruining it

Same here. Worse is when I tried to get in touch with them years later, but it was too late. Damage was done and they'd all moved on and forgotten about me.

They got tired of waiting for me to come around, tired of my flakiness and choosing romantic pursuits over them every single time, tired of my negativity.

They were some of the best friends I ever had and represented the one time in my life I ever truly felt anything remotely close to happiness and it's something that I've never been able to let go of fully. I still dream about my best friend a lot and it's always a really hard reminder of what I lost.