Anyone else know their attempt will be impulsive?

[disasterplant]

I've given up on planning a date because I know there is no point for me.

I have impulsive tendencies linked to emotional outbursts- essentially one hour I can feel fine and normal and the next I can have a loaded gun to my head with intent to pull the trigger.

Due to my patterns, I've come to the conclusion my future attempt will not be planned, and probably not peaceful since it will probably be done out of a burst of despair and rage.

Curious if anyone else has realized this? Maybe still have plans and/or a set date despite impulsivity?

 

[Jdieiejdjaow]

I don't have a date. Will just go with the flow. When I'll be abused again (which I'll), that's when I'll take the next step.

I know my committing to it will be impulsive as I don't want to die, but I don't have any other options either so I'll have to force it. That's why I'll pick up rope today.

 

[galaxid]

I have a range. I'm pretty sure around the timeframe I've chosen I'll be inconsolably upset. So its very likely I'll reach that point.

 

[Namelesa]

I don't see the point of planning it around a date for me as I don't care when my death happens as long as it happens soon. I know I probably won't get though SI and my low pain tolerance to kill myself with willpower and my logic alone so I need something else to push me so I will definitely be ctbing when I experience a strong impulsive urge from intense mental pain. For me this decision hasn't been thought up impulsively as I been thinking this for quite a long time and know logically its whats best for me, its just I need my emotions to finally get through the fear of pain to get what I want.

 

[slightoverlooked]

same here...my suicidal breakdowns can be 1 hour long or a whole day so even if i decide to do it impulsively if its a long breakdown it will be enough to fast and then drink the SN