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red_cardinal

Member
May 25, 2026
11
It's a terrible feeling, especially as you age. I truly am not doing anything meaningful with my life due to my issues, and all my time is spent working on those issues and trying to manage them so they don't affect my life. Which is ironic, because struggling with complex problems, they can't not affect my life. I'm exhausted, and deeply sad when I see people overcoming their obstacles because it makes me feel inadequate, broken, defective, it's just a reminder of my failure. I'm the opposite of selfish, and I rejoice others' success, but (not so) deep down, I'm collapsing, and I feel helpless.

I'm not sure I'll be here longer, but for some reason I still try and try and try, I maybe still have a glimmer of hope. For those whose issues are mental health related, feel free to share, as I feel so, so alone in this...
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: violetforever and endboss
blossomsinwilt

blossomsinwilt

Member
May 12, 2026
18
i feel the exact same... i'm still relatively young but due to a mix of mental health issues, i can't bring myself to do anything to build a better future for myself, improve my current situation, or do anything for myself really. i have a hard time feeding myself or getting out of bed most days and i don't socialize or go out much so i feel pretty invisible. it's painful letting the weeks slip by, watching the people around me move into successful lives and achieve their goals and find themselves and their purposes and just do so much. i wish so hard to just be normal and functional and be able to do something with my life but i can't; i feel incapable and lost and purposeless and lazy. i recently got broken up with and my ex mentioned that my mental health issues and struggles with suicidal thoughts had made the relationship stressful to stay in, and it just made me feel guilty for ever trying to be a part of anyone else's life.

i've come to like being alone and not having to do anything. i'm at my calmest when i'm laying in my bed not doing anything at all, not even on my phone or thinking about anything. just being still. i'm planning to ctb sometime this summer and i'm either doing it late at night in my bed or in a forest i like to walk in.
 

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