L

lizzywizzy09

Specialist
May 11, 2024
380
My golden years never even got to happen. Never will either. Part of why I have to go, that and the horrifying health issues.
 
  • Like
Reactions: AdamOndiAhman
B

brokeandbroken

Elementalist
Apr 18, 2023
808
Ehh I don't think I had "golden years" that said there is very little in the way of happiness for me in the future. All of my happiness and joy were taken from me unfortunately.
 
divinemistress36

divinemistress36

Visionary
Jan 1, 2024
2,221
My golden time was in the womb
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: lizzywizzy09 and AdamOndiAhman
Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
19,999
Definitely, although I probably wasted my actual golden years being scared and obsessive and flaky just like I am now.
 
Midwest_Indigo

Midwest_Indigo

Member
Jun 17, 2024
12
My golden years were the 2000s. Last decade and this one have been miserable. I liked who I was when I was younger. The older I get the more I see that my childhood trauma ruined me and that therapists can't help me.

I don't enjoy anything. I want connection but it's my brain that wants it, needs it, really. I exist in my brain, but I like to think I'm the observer separate from urges and impulses the brain puts out. The observer is tired of the brain dragging this existence out.

I have several books I want to read. Reading sustained me through my 20s and gave me meaning as well as some TV series that resonated with me. After completing that, I see no point in continuing. I remember a guy on here once wrote that after he finished watching his anime show lineup that he was going to end it.

Yesterday, I saw a Instagram clip of the day in the life of a middle class worker. Looked miserable. Even the "ideal" life is miserable and monotonous.

Really relate to the realization of the childhood trauma and its effects. I've been told so many times to keep my head up, and it's like no one sees I AM trying. I haven't tried all the options but I try so hard in therapy. I use skills. I try to enact change. It should not be this much of a struggle to simply enjoy things. I want that connection too but it feels impossible.

And yes, have heard from others who want to finish a show or video game and then they'll be okay to go. I think about my favorite games to replay, but also I can't focus on much of anything. I try to give myself one goal to at least wait until this or that but when the apathy hits, it doesn't even matter.

Thanks for making this post.
 
derpyderpins

derpyderpins

Accentuate the Positive
Sep 19, 2023
1,124
I don't think I haden golden years, but definitely golden moments. It's a rose-colored glasses thing. If I think about Uni, I loved the freedom in making a schedule for myself, I loved having my bills and concerns taken care of for the most part, and I loved feeling young and alive. If I'm fair, though, I was also depressed during that time, and the period was not one of being a net positive.

I will say what I feel has passed me by are (1) the highest highs life has to offer, and (2) the potential to make a better future. I wish I had those things back.
 
Sarros

Sarros

Member
Sep 2, 2021
78
My golden years are all the years after the 2nd date on my tombstone lmao. Get me out of here.
 
lost_ange2211

lost_ange2211

An angel who wants to go home..
May 29, 2024
118
I feel similar although most people wouldn't consider me old. Maybe not golden years but for me it's a time where I was happy where I didn't think too much about all the stuff, where I was free of suicide thoughts, voids, emotional pain,... all that stuff.

I feel like this isn't my time, I don't like all the highly modern tech, all the focus on digital stuff. I just wanna find my peace and not be part of this kinda time and society anymore.
 

Similar threads

Infinite Solipsist
Replies
9
Views
263
Suicide Discussion
dolemitedrums
D
F
Replies
1
Views
179
Suicide Discussion
sugarh1gh
sugarh1gh
needthebus
Replies
6
Views
255
Suicide Discussion
needthebus
needthebus