Discussion Anyone else completely let go of their appearance/self-care?

[manwewaslonely]

I used to not care, I'd wear sweatpants or running pants everyday. But my ocd has changed and now I have to dress nicely everyday or I'll freak out. It's kinda good though because people would suspect something was up if I had a ton of sudden changes in my appearance. But it's hard to remember to brush my teeth and take my contacts out. Dark eye bags everyday and I'm pretty pale. Still need to shave. Don't eat a lot either and when I do it's all bad for me.

 

[seekingoblivion]

I gotta look presentable for work and sometimes when I leave the house. I'm really not one to give the greatest fuck how I'm dressed though.

 

[ExitTheDay]

It's not that I stopped caring about myself or my appearance, I simply stopped caring what people thought about me because its not my obligation to care about other people's opinions specially about myself

 

[laila888]

Yeah, I only shower once a week when I wash my hair, I spend every day at home in pyjamas. If I have to go out - usually only to buy groceries - in the summer I wear sweatpants with a loose longsleeved T-Shirt because I stopped shaving and I put on a lot of weight so I do not want to show any skin. In the winter I just put on my jacket above my pjyamas, I do not even bother changing,

 

[Im2high4this]

In my twenties I was reasonably pretty and even when low always would eat very well, it actually helped give me focus, and had plenty of exercise. As I've always had low self-esteem I would always make sure I thought my clothes looked good together and hair make-up paid attention to, so never minded looking on the mirror. One thing I did think was I looked alright if I didn't always even feel it.

Wow how that's changed. I'm out and about now not having brushed my hair (my hair is elbow length) or teeth for three or four days (I lose track) with quite a ridiculous combination of clothing on, as just getting dressed was hard enough. I haven't been able to stand looking in the mirror for nearly two years. The untreated ptsd and depression/anxiety has led to years of heavy drinking and my face is now permanently puffy and covered in red spider viens. I've almost lost my appetite and take no pleasure in food anymore, surviving off sweets and crisps. I barely exercise and sleep on the sofa, often not changing clothes for days. I can't stand being places where I might meet people I know, I look so haggard and revolting. I hate the mirror and I really hate people looking at me. I've turned into this disgusting skanky husk.

Anyone else too low to manage their health and appearance?

Yes it got so bad people at work told me I look and smell like a mess and I was like
holy shit they are right, I haven't even thought about self upkeep in awhile. No need to look nice when you don't go out besides work.

 

[lululoo]

I've stopped working out. I need to lose weight but can only give a shit enough to just stop myself from gaining more.

There are some things I can't slack on-- like washing my hair. My head gets so itchy (new lovely fibro symptom I guess) that I can't go more than 2-3 days without washing it. So I stay on top of showering.

 

[j124m]

I want to go into a wood and hang myself from a tree. What's the best ligature to use and how do i tie this to a tree. I have taken several overdoses over the past few months and all they have done is given me a permanent medication rash

 

[lymestolemylife]

"My hair is elbow length" I'm a woman who lost 75% of my hair at the age of 24, and I can't grow long hair anymore like I used to. My hair is actually a part (not the whole reason) of why I want to ctb. I've cried so many times wishing I could brush my long hair again, and feel it wrapping around my shoulders and arms. It really is all relative, if I had elbow length hair I would feel beautiful. If it were possible for me to look good I would put in the effort but what the fuck is the point when I look like a prematurely aged troll.

I had gorgeous thick hair and people didn't believe me that I didn't have extensions now its patchy on one side and you can see through it if I dont wash my hair every damn day. I have Chronic Lyme for 20 years and last few years it's gotten way worse.

 

[BPD Barbie]

My appearance is really the last thing I have that I care about, but even lately that's been struggling. I usually shower almost daily, put makeup on and do my hair before going out and always try to dress nicely. It's hard, especially in my darkest times, but I wanna look in the mirror and see me, not my illness. Its the last bit of humanity I have tbh

 

[charlixoh]

I screwed up by not looking after myself properly, hoping I would die, and then realising that it's extremely hard to. Now I'm stuck in this ugly body that's breaking down, without a job and soon to be without a home. So great! ...eh

 

[LivingANDDying26]

yupp my face has pimples and looks so rough my skin is dry &my hair is so uneven and awful. (trichotillomania) I struggle to brush my teeth every day. which then makes wearing my retainer difficult sothat hasnt been happening.

been tryna pick it up thesed ays bc of how much appearances matter and I miss not looking like shit & being adored as such tbh

 

[OreoWellington]

I am very shitty at this too, but now I cannot afford to be because I am at risk at losing my job over this.

 

[Worthless_nobody]

I definitely let go of my self and my appearance. I used to do my hair, wear makeup and nice clothes now I just don't care and can't be bothered. People always said I was pretty and now I let that go completely too... I have don't anyone or a reason to try now.

 

[I’vehadenough]

Theres no point in self care when a doctor permanently disfigured my face. It's like putting lipstick on a pig. Fuck. I can't wait to die already

 

[Rena rossy]

There were some times when it would be worst than others. I know it may sound disgusting but there where even some times that I wouldn't take showers for weeks and my hair was a mess. Now, these last few days I have been even worst than those days I don't have the strength. At least I used to like drinking with some close friends but now I don't even want to do that. And the only fucking thing that actually helped me reduce crying compared to how I was crying before, was setting up a date.

Also, now I work from home and there's nothing that motivates me to fix myself.

 

[Jean4]

I took a shower today, but got back into my pajamas. Showering was an accomplishment.

 

[1DayItWillBover]

If it wasnt for my job i wouldnt give two shits about showers or wearing clean clothes, etc

 

[KiraLittleOwl]

Completely let myself go...
I don't have energy at all and it won't make a difference, I will still feel like shit.
But I take care of my eyebrows, can't stand them when they overgrow.

 

[scorpiooo2]

I really just don't care anymore. Nobody shows interest in me so there's no one to dress up for.
I really just don't care anymore. Nobody shows interest in me so there's no one to dress up for.

 

[porfin1234]

Yea... about 5 months... hardly wash clothes, at one point didn't shower for a week, stopped wearing make up, etc etc
Used to be all about dressing up and outfits. But made my life so chaotic and made so many bad choices I just stopped taking care of myself. I feel like that beautiful, fun, girl died.

 

[Wayfaerer]

Yes. I've completely stopped brushing my teeth when I decided on CTB. Not doing so had always been a nasty habit but I've never gone this long of a stretch without doing so. At my worst ever pre-suicide, I only brushed once a week but I've gone a couple months at a time these days. Jesus, my mouth is a complete train-wreck now, It's further fuel for CTB.

Despite lacking in hygiene, I've always had perfect teeth up until a couple of years ago, probably a combination of good genetics and I didn't consume much sugar (without a straw) back then.

 

[Moonicide]

Yep. At my worst, I have gone months without washing my hair, face, teeth, etc. Lately I've been a bit better about it, but I still struggle with washing my face and brushing my teeth regularly.

 

[Dystopic_Momento]

I let myself go, but make sure to brush teeth, clean my body at least somewhat and wear clean clothes. It's important to maintain a front because if you show signs of not caring for yourself and anyone from the state comes around. Blending in and not alarming anyone can be a motivator.

 

[waterbottleman]

No, just the opposite actually.

i follow a skin care routine involving skin cleanser, toner, moisturizer, exfoliater, and vitamin e oil. It's made a big difference, my skin glows more than it ever has. If I didn't have such bad social anxiety I'd also go to a beauty parlor to get facials and go to a dentist to get my teeth whitened.

i also have a couple of hair products that I use, blow dry my hair too.

i could exercise more but I still exercise occasionall. i brush and floss my teeth everyday.

As for my wardrobe I regularly wear button up shirt tucked into slim fitting jeans with matching colored leather shoes and belt. Always make sure that my clothes are clean.

i also have a ton of different body washes with various scents cause I like to smell good. My favorite is this coconut and coffee body was, omg it smells so good.

Ironically the more depressed/suicidal I get the more I care about my appearance. I think it's a reflection of the fact that I've noticed as I go deeper into depression I'm more empathetic towards myself. I have this growing attitdue that if everyone dislikes me, no one loves me, and no one ever will because I'm so unloveable then the only person left to love me and care about me is myself. So I should I take care of myself and dress nicely for myself so I feel good about myself and I feel like someone actually cares about me even if it's only myself who cares or even notices how much work I put into my appearance.

slowly my depression is turning me into a metrosexual whereas just a year or 2 ago I was a typical nerdy guy who put little to any work in his appearance.