thats okay, theres no pressure to talk to anyone, the thread is always there whenever you feel like it :) it's pretty inactive anyways lol. also im glad to know you feel comfortable talking to me it feels like an honour in a way
niigo has a lot of stories so it makes sense that it would take a while, even getting through the first 3 is progress! the mizu1 mizu5 enumeration is in order of her focus events. like mizu1 is secret distance which idsmile comes from, mizu2 is your footprints my destination/what lies behind what lies ahead, ect. mizu(number) is just a way people in the fandom shorten the events, i think it started from mizu5 or so.
mizu5 isnt the only event you can understand her better from :) all of her events give a bit of insight into her, mizu5 is only the angst peak of her stories
(your writing is fine to me. theres a few mistakes sometimes but its not very frequent and even with them your writing is still readable)
(i know the op says that "theres no worries" and "you can send a private convo in SaSu though" but i actually don't know how do that, so sorry for the bunch of off topics stuffs

)
i actually passed this day practically just rooting on the bed and being too depressed to doing anything but at some moment i just grab my phone and for some reason i went to tiktok (it's been months that i don't open this app cus this shit just make me feel very very bad).
I get shocked cus some pjsk content just started to appear (the last time i went to this app i wasn't into pjsk stuff and the fandom), so i just keeps to watch and like theses videos. I was genuinely enjoying all of them, but out of nowhere, i started feeling sick.
idk why but maybe it was because for some reason i always feel i little bit envious when i see someone making contents about stuffs i am hyperfixated, like, I'd like to do those things too (but i never manage to do cus i sucks at trying to do anything). i always fell very very sick when i see the comments of those contents and i simply just don't know why. see a bunch of people talking about the videos and laughing with yours friends it's enough to make me feel like throwing up (maybe it's just envy again). and theses stuffs mixed with the fact that always when im depressed asf im feel that i has no right to actually enjoy contents or entertainment on general. (sorry for this embarrassing and pathetic vent, you seems like a very good person so i think i felt comfortable typing this).
backing to the "main" topic!! well i think i maybe understand theses enumerated events? but i remember that i actually reeds one story focused on mizuki! was one about the school event/festival idk. And this was so good to see :D like i don't remember very well but i related to mizuki on this on cus them do not wanted to attend this


i never liked theses school events, i literally never showed up, like, not even if it was "mandatory".
weel but at least An called them and after this mizuki mades friends with the boys and on the middle mizuki went to the terrace (sorry i didn't read the story on english and i forgot how this is exactly called) to looking for tsukasa and ended up finding Rui there. Both of the two weren't in a very good mood on the moment but after that everyone showed up on the terrace and they all managed to enjoy the event a little bit together! (lol idk why i summarize the story but i think it was just to pass the time.)
I actually admire so much that mizuki can wear the clothes that they like and do not feel ashamed. I never looked for the translation of idsmile but it was something about identity, right? I really would like to talk more about all niigo members and i love them but unfortunately i really not very on the mood to read and consume those kind of contents. maybe i should try one day. actually it's been 3 days since I don't have open pjsk (and i was very addicted to it) but what's about you? What's the highest song's level you managed to fc? Mine was just 2 slowly songs on master that are level 27
omg i think i wrote a whole bible here then sorry for the big text and thanks for reading this far.
Yes, it's Kanade.
To not derail the thread too much, I'm not exactly a NEET, but sometimes I feel I'd be better off as one. I have illnesses which could qualify me for disability and I wouldn't need to work, but there's a strange persistence in my head that I have to keep going, even though it's not as if society cares. Opting out of being another cog in the machine sounds nice, but I can't, there's too many obligations I'm forced to abide by.
omg it's was really you! now all that's missing is somebody with a ena's icon to complete the bingo lol