Anybody ever try to date someone you find unattractive?

[Final Escape]

If u can't imagine having sex with them ever, it might be better not to even do this. Since at some point they will want to, and you would have to be really high or drunk to deal lol! Just thought I would share. I do understand if u yourself are very objectively unattractive to the opposite sex, than it may just be best to accept that u might be too old, or too something that is a turn off to a majority of the opposite sex in the attractiveness level u desire. It goes both ways. I just thought I sometimes find it surprising that many older people still expect to find love. I'm not saying it's impossible, but people are fooling themselves if they think that u can easily find a partner after like a certain age including myself lol! It's difficult because you lose your attractiveness, and it's tougher to not only lower your standards but also because that attraction in youth is what initially draws people together which then used to keep people together because they aged together but fell in love while they were still attractive.

 

[Help_Me]

This was disgusting... she smoked like hell, she was so ugly. I don't even know why i dated with her (just dated, no sex and serious love affair involved) for 5-6 days. Thank god she just litearlly disappeared.

 

[Sinbad]

Don't date someone you find unattractive.. Get a toy boy instead. Plenty of handsome young men yearning to mate with a mature woman.

 

[Threads]

I try very hard not to judge people by their physical appearances.

Often times people can't really control that.I find attractiveness in chemistry. If I have chemistry with someone, that is what is most important to me.

 

[AndyCurious]

You never know a person just by the looks, you need to get to know the person, to know if he or she is attractive.. Never judge a book by it's cover is my motto..<3

 

[Final Escape]

Don't date someone you find unattractive.. Get a toy boy instead. Plenty of handsome young men yearning to mate with a mature woman.

I like younger guys but then u run into the problem of the mismatch of sex drives. Young men want to fuck a lot lol! Although for something short term it can be fun, but then u feel insecure that u will get your heart broke when they trade up for someone younger at some point because u can't deny that big age gaps effect things. This is why I don't think it's ideal but it can be exciting in the short run.

 

[Ashpac]

Yeah i tried it when i was 17. She was my friend. I asked her out when i was drunk. Woke up next morning thinking ''aww shit now i have to date her'' we had one date, after that i said im not in the place to be dating now. We fell out for like 5 years then made up again and put it behind us. Dodged a bullet there LOL.

 

[Xerxes]

I date a person if I connected with them. With connection comes attraction. When I lose that connection, they become unattractive.

 

[sini]

I met 4 men once. They were all big men who worked in bars like my friends in small town. Three of them where normally seen as very good looking, muscular, handsome and were nice and had a nice job.
One was really obese, hairy, had bad achne scars in face and back (I thought he had burned his skin in accident), bad teeth, money problems and drank little too much, and had something that influenced his self-esteem even more.
He was really humble and didn't think much of himself. That made me like him. I didn't think he was good looking at first. But after few weeks he was the best looking man in the world and I was so in love with him. Never been so in love with anyone else.

 

[sini]

I always think that good and kind people are so beautiful and perfect inside out. For example if some homeless person says something nice to me or opens a door to me I see him as beautiful. Or if someone is very humble.
I don't like people who think they are better than others or very materialistic people.
I honestly can say that I could fall in love with any looking man and in any situation (sick, in wheelchair etc.) who is good to me and others.

 

[sini]

I try very hard not to judge people by their physical appearances.

Often times people can't really control that.I find attractiveness in chemistry. If I have chemistry with someone, that is what is most important to me.

You are right. Blond petite women aren't always stupid and superficial bimbos either.;) People say I have baby-face too and some that I look or sound like a kid. Nobody takes me at first seriously even if I am better educated than my boss. I tried to dress well to work and look smarter for long. Then let it be
and laughed about it. I think it's healthy to be able to laugh about yourself, "flaws" (not meaning anyone has flaws in their natural look) and srew ups especially. ;)

 

[weedoge]

Yeah actually, it was pretty complicated emotionally. It was just long distance but I've also been made a move on by people I found unattractive and found it a very strange experience because I also try not to judge people based on appearance. I guilt myself heavily for even finding people unattractive and I think it's become a bit of a neurosis for me now. It's one reason I stopped dating actually, I can't really understand how my feelings relate to other people very well.

 

[sini]

Yeah actually, it was pretty complicated emotionally. It was just long distance but I've also been made a move on by people I found unattractive and found it a very strange experience because I also try not to judge people based on appearance. I guilt myself heavily for even finding people unattractive and I think it's become a bit of a neurosis for me now. It's one reason I stopped dating actually, I can't really understand how my feelings relate to other people very well.

It's normal to not feel attracted sexually to most people and I think it's a good thing. I can love someone very good looking in my mind also but as a brother and couldn't date him even if he wanted to. It needs to have right kind of chemistry too. Sometimes nobody would be right when you want to be just by yourself or live single life.

 

[Miss clefable]

Yes don't really want to talk about it but it was awful

 

[Eren]

In my case, when I connect emotionally with a person, even though at first I am not very sexually attracted, then I am attracted more, because I feel an emotional bond with the other person.

 

[weedoge]

It's normal to not feel attracted sexually to most people and I think it's a good thing. I can love someone very good looking in my mind also but as a brother and couldn't date him even if he wanted to. It needs to have right kind of chemistry too. Sometimes nobody would be right when you want to be just by yourself or live single life.

I definitely think I tried to force it for the sake of not feeling so alone. Thank you for your response though.

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

Yeah, several times actually, for various reasons. Sometimes it just seemed to make sense but in hindsight I wasn't attracted to them. I have also dated girls just because I was horny. I think many dudes have. It's pretty easy to say "don't date someone you're not attracted to" but it's rarely that cut and dry in the moment. There are all kinds of emotional and biological factors that come into play.

 

[Xerxes]

I just learned to never stick my dick in crazy.

 

[funnyvalentine]

Been there, done that, bloody awful. ( And I don't mean unattractive looks here, but an unattractive personality...yikes...)

 

[Eily]

You shouldn't be with someone you're not attracted to. It's very mean to do so. You might have "chemistry" with the person but you will subconsciously treat them bad because you don't want to be with them sexually yet you crave sex. Just creates bitterness and eventually the person you find unattractive will feel your tension and your rejection, and it hurts.

Just speaking from experience. Happened to me twice. About to happen to me a third time but I'm more prepared.

 

[weedoge]

You shouldn't be with someone you're not attracted to. It's very mean to do so. You might have "chemistry" with the person but you will subconsciously treat them bad because you don't want to be with them sexually yet you crave sex. Just creates bitterness and eventually the person you find unattractive will feel your tension and your rejection, and it hurts.

Just speaking from experience. Happened to me twice. About to happen to me a third time but I'm more prepared.

Happened to me once and I felt fucking terrible for it, pretty much one reason I decided to stop dating altogether a long time ago.

 

[Lefty]

Well I have to say I'm not exactly eye-candy myself, but I have tried dating people uglier than me, but it never worked out. It can pay to be picky sometimes, you won't end up dating someone you'll regret.

 

[azucaramargo]

This was disgusting... she smoked like hell, she was so ugly. I don't even know why i dated with her (just dated, no sex and serious love affair involved) for 5-6 days. Thank god she just litearlly disappeared.

Why DID you date her? Just curious. I fear that men feel this way about me, and I'd just like to know what prompted you to date her in the first place if you found her so physically unattractive?

 

[azucaramargo]

You shouldn't be with someone you're not attracted to. It's very mean to do so. You might have "chemistry" with the person but you will subconsciously treat them bad because you don't want to be with them sexually yet you crave sex. Just creates bitterness and eventually the person you find unattractive will feel your tension and your rejection, and it hurts.

Just speaking from experience. Happened to me twice. About to happen to me a third time but I'm more prepared.

So, you were with people you found unattractive because you craved sex? (Not judging, just trying to clarify. I fear that men might do this to me.) So, the quality of the sex doesn't suffer even if you find the person unattractive?

 

[azucaramargo]

You shouldn't be with someone you're not attracted to. It's very mean to do so. You might have "chemistry" with the person but you will subconsciously treat them bad because you don't want to be with them sexually yet you crave sex. Just creates bitterness and eventually the person you find unattractive will feel your tension and your rejection, and it hurts.

Just speaking from experience. Happened to me twice. About to happen to me a third time but I'm more prepared.

When you say it happened to you twice, do you mean that YOU slept with people you found unattractive, or people viewed YOU as unattractive, yet used you for sex anyhow? If it's the latter, I fear that happened to me, too.

 

[Help_Me]

Why DID you date her? Just curious. I fear that men feel this way about me, and I'd just like to know what prompted you to date her in the first place if you found her so physically unattractive?

I don't remember it well, but i think i know what was the reason. Let me get this straight : i was just extremely nervous i won't be able to find someone else (believe me or not, i still consider myself ugly), so i literally forced myself to date with this disgusting pig for a week, only because she was the only one who gave me her phone number. I know this was stupid, you're goddamn right. Just an impulsive action instead of well-informed decision

 

[azucaramargo]

I don't remember it well, but i think i know what was the reason. Let me get this straight : i was just extremely nervous i won't be able to find someone else (believe me or not, i still consider myself ugly), so i literally forced myself to date with this disgusting pig for a week, only because she was the only one who gave me her phone number. I know this was stupid, you're goddamn right. Just an impulsive action instead of well-informed decision

No, Help_Me, I am/was in NO WAY trying to judge your actions. I was just trying to better understand them. PLEASE don't ever feel like I'm judging you. I have been cruel to people, and I have used people, and I've been used myself. You are not ugly -- neither inside nor out. Thank you for explaining your experience -- I'm just trying to learn. I feel like I've jumped at the chance to be men's "disgusting pig" only for the thrill of the attention/affection/approval--no matter how fleeting. I am grateful to hear a man's side of the story. It's helpful to me. Again, I do not judge you, and I appreciate you for sharing your experience.

 

[Help_Me]

No, Help_Me, I am/was in NO WAY trying to judge your actions. I was just trying to better understand them. PLEASE don't ever feel like I'm judging you. I have been cruel to people, and I have used people, and I've been used myself. You are not ugly -- neither inside nor out. Thank you for explaining your experience -- I'm just trying to learn. I feel like I've jumped at the chance to be men's "disgusting pig" only for the thrill of the attention/affection/approval--no matter how fleeting. I am grateful to hear a man's side of the story. It's helpful to me. Again, I do not judge you, and I appreciate you for sharing your experience.

Everything is ok, bro !) Yea, my whole experience dating with somebody unattractive was the result of my impulsive actions(( I was convinced i won't find anyone else(

 

[Red star]

To me personality is the deciding factor to where I'm attracted to them or not. I wouldn't be able to fake that in a relationship.

 

[lost illusions]

I asked someone out to dinner that I wasn't attracted to. Usually there is more than looks. I quickly realized she thought worse of me from the beginning