99% of people think like this commenter… and it’s scary

[glowing.purple.aura]

Of course I ended up seeing this while I was already feeling hopeless and wanting to die.

I swear… if you're anything like this commenter, just don't speak, ever. Those of us normal people left in the world will thank you.

This commenter is actually the worst type of person and it seems like everyone these days thinks and acts just like them. They try to justify their selfish actions too by calling them "boundaries"—no, you're just borderline evil.

And the worst part is… suffering will most likely never catch up to them. They'll just continue to live their happy lives while being rewarded by society for having no empathy whatsoever.

 

[SarahThrowsGin]

What's worse, is that this mentality "I'm your friend not a therapist" coexists with therapists who think they (therapists) should debate not validate you, because otherwise therapy wouldn't be different from friendship. Imagine having no friends as autistic person, having only those who will argue not support, then coming to therapy, where therapist decides your views need to be challenged (as if you don't get that for free in daily life). Worse yet, that therapy based on tearing into your views is considered "evidence-based" (CBT). No empathy in society, no empathy in therapy room even when you hire them for money (therapists working in approaches other than CBT can still, and often will in my experience, default to challenging your views, Socratic dialogue etc.).

 

[Jamesbond]

Are you expecting sympathy by posting things that would call for that response, or are you hoping they will have a magic wand and magic things better for you? What makes them a bad person in your eyes?

 

[glowing.purple.aura]

Are you expecting sympathy by posting things that would call for that response, or are you hoping they will have a magic wand and magic things better for you? What makes them a bad person in your eyes?

1. That's not my post, I just came across it
2. I don't even know how to reply to this because it doesn't make sense in response to what I posted... I never suggested that I wanted anyone to fix anything for me. I also think that the screenshot by itself is enough to show that they're a bad person... that's how they react to someone in desperate need of help and support. I don't know how to explain it any further to you.

 

[Jamesbond]

I

1. That's not my post, I just came across it
2. I don't even know how to reply to this because it doesn't make sense in response to what I posted... I never suggested that I wanted anyone to fix anything for me. I also think that the screenshot by itself is enough to show that they're a bad person... that's how they react to someone in desperate need of help and support. I don't know how to explain it any further to you.

I don't think they are a bad person for saying that. I assumed it was your video my apologies for that. I know with my problems there is nobody that can help me with them. If I was to post something on a public platform I wouldn't be expecting someone to magically make me better. He's just wrote he doesn't know them and he's not a therapist. I don't see how that makes them a bad person. I believe now a days people look for reasons to find offence far too easily. It is what it is, just someone responding to a post with an opinion.

 

[owo]

1) social media is shit
2) friendship is degenerated and initial definition is not actual anymore
3) even if 2) wasnt true many others will dont care because of their garbage personality

 

[Jamesbond]

1) social media is shit
2) friendship is degenerated and initial definition is not actual anymore
3) even if 2) wasnt true many others will dont care because of their garbage personality

I don't think it's people don't care, everyone else has so much shit going on of thier own it's a lot to deal with other peoples problems. But you're right, social media in general is shit and not productive

 

[Forever Sleep]

I know I'm being really dense here but- I don't get it... What usually happens when the person in the image randomly tells people they love them then? Why aren't people accepting that they love them? Are they arguing back?

I suppose I'm just trying to recall it from a personal perspective. Usually, it's nice if someone tells you they love you or, appreciate you as a friend. If it's out of the blue though- it may indicate that they are feeling lonely and they want their love to be reciprocated.

So, why would they want the person to accept but ignore that? Wouldn't they actually want an: 'I love you too' in response to that? If they are sending the message out randomly and frequently though- it may lose potency.

I don't know- it just seems an odd phrase to me. I don't know if passive, aggressive is the right term but, it reads like that for me. 'I love you- just accept it.' So- loving but then- assertive and almost borderline aggressive: 'just put the phone down and accept it' is an order! We can't demand people accept our declarations of emotion in a certain way. They will respond in their own way.

The person in the image is saying- accept that I love you and put the phone down- so- accept my affection and shut up about it- effectively. Again- why is the recipient hesitant to accept it? The times when it does annoy me are when someone really has a go at me/ berates for something but then- ends with: 'I do love you'.

Maybe they nagged because they cared but people also nag and berate us because it suits them. They effectively upset you but then want reassurance that they haven't damaged the relationship. So- that feels manipulative in that moment. They upset you then, emotionally blackmail you into accepting their love and (hopefully) returning it. When- in that moment- you might be feeling angry with them. 'I love you' can be used manipulatively as well.

Maybe that's what the commenter meant. That they wouldn't be drawn into a discussion on what the person actually meant. They would do as they asked- just accept the text and not be pulled into a heated discussion. That said- the 'therapy' comment was unpleasant.

Really though- if you received that as a message from someone- wouldn't you feel like you'd done something wrong to them? It sounds more aggressive/ manipulative to me- rather than purely friendly and loving.

 

[Jamesbond]

I know I'm being really dense here but- I don't get it... What usually happens when the person in the image randomly tells people they love them then? Why aren't people accepting that they love them? Are they arguing back?

I suppose I'm just trying to recall it from a personal perspective. Usually, it's nice if someone tells you they love you or, appreciate you as a friend. If it's out of the blue though- it may indicate that they are feeling lonely and they want their love to be reciprocated.

So, why would they want the person to accept but ignore that? Wouldn't they actually want an: 'I love you too' in response to that? If they are sending the message out randomly and frequently though- it may lose potency.

I don't know- it just seems an odd phrase to me. I don't know if passive, aggressive is the right term but, it reads like that for me. 'I love you- just accept it.' So- loving but then- assertive and almost borderline aggressive: 'just put the phone down and accept it' is an order! We can't demand people accept our declarations of emotion in a certain way. They will respond in their own way.

The person in the image is saying- accept that I love you and put the phone down- so- accept my affection and shut up about it- effectively. Again- why is the recipient hesitant to accept it? The times when it does annoy me are when someone really has a go at me/ berates for something but then- ends with: 'I do love you'.

Maybe they nagged because they cared but people also nag and berate us because it suits them. They effectively upset you but then want reassurance that they haven't damaged the relationship. So- that feels manipulative in that moment. They upset you then, emotionally blackmail you into accepting their love and (hopefully) returning it. When- in that moment- you might be feeling angry with them. 'I love you' can be used manipulatively as well.

Maybe that's what the commenter meant. That they wouldn't be drawn into a discussion on what the person actually meant. They would do as they asked- just accept the text and not be pulled into a heated discussion. That said- the 'therapy' comment was unpleasant.

Really though- if you received that as a message from someone- wouldn't you feel like you'd done something wrong to them? It sounds more aggressive/ manipulative to me- rather than purely friendly and loving.

Similar view to me but I don't think it makes them a nasty person. The reality is they aren't thier therapist. For me therapists for the best part don't actually give a shit they are paid to sit there and listen to you, they rarely remember what you tell them week to week and it's like a repetitive cycle of repetition and no resolution. If the people paid to help can't invest in people, I don't think it's fair to suddenly attack someone for effectively saying "I don't give a shit I've got my own problems to deal with". The reality is nobody has a magic wand to make someone better, putting expectation on strangers is either a cry for help or an unrealistic expectation that they will fix you.
As I've grown older and deteriorated more mentally and socially I've learned hard lessons about the system.
It's just a harsh reality that you learn to accept.

 

[eggsausagerice]

I know I'm being really dense here but- I don't get it... What usually happens when the person in the image randomly tells people they love them then? Why aren't people accepting that they love them? Are they arguing back?

I suppose I'm just trying to recall it from a personal perspective. Usually, it's nice if someone tells you they love you or, appreciate you as a friend. If it's out of the blue though- it may indicate that they are feeling lonely and they want their love to be reciprocated.

So, why would they want the person to accept but ignore that? Wouldn't they actually want an: 'I love you too' in response to that? If they are sending the message out randomly and frequently though- it may lose potency.

people send i love you texts at 3-4 am because they're planning on killing themselves and/or suicidebaiting so that someone talks them out of it. if you're legitimately asking why someone would get a negative response for texting i love you, anyway.

They try to justify their selfish actions too by calling them "boundaries"—no, you're just borderline evil.

And the worst part is… suffering will most likely never catch up to them. They'll just continue to live their happy lives while being rewarded by society for having no empathy whatsoever.

Are you expecting sympathy by posting things that would call for that response, or are you hoping they will have a magic wand and magic things better for you?

to be honest, while i agree that people can be callous towards severely depressed or actively suicidal people, there's no reason to send a suicidey text like i love you and hope that someone texts you back, when other people could be busy or sleeping. it's no one's responsibility to be there to comfort you while you go through your own problems. my main issue with the tiktok is how it seems inherently attention seeking and vague, because they don't even say "i'm thinking/going to kill myself", they're just hoping someone interprets it as them having suicidal thoughts and steps in.

in my worst moments, i've texted someone to tell me that i should've been aborted and that i should kill myself, because i think that i contribute nothing to society by being depressed. i didn't want to be talked out of suicide, but it's still attention seeking of me to talk about suicide while i'm actively ideating and trying to harm myself. talking about suicidal ideation is usually harmful to most relationships because it creates the feeling that you need to be comforted or that you're triggering to be around when you talk about suicide unprompted.

i've been in the same situation where i've talked about suicide over and over and i eventually cut the person i was talking to off because i felt like an emotional burden or like only someone that was actually suicidal could relate to what i was talking about. i still get worried when someone passively brings up killing themselves too many times and i wonder if they want me to notice and tell them i care about them. it's draining to feel like i have to be there for people for their own sake instead of for mine, and i imagine that other people would feel the same way about me.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Similar view to me but I don't think it makes them a nasty person. The reality is they aren't thier therapist. For me therapists for the best part don't actually give a shit they are paid to sit there and listen to you, they rarely remember what you tell them week to week and it's like a repetitive cycle of repetition and no resolution. If the people paid to help can't invest in people, I don't think it's fair to suddenly attack someone for effectively saying "I don't give a shit I've got my own problems to deal with". The reality is nobody has a magic wand to make someone better, putting expectation on strangers is either a cry for help or an unrealistic expectation that they will fix you.
As I've grown older and deteriorated more mentally and socially I've learned hard lessons about the system.
It's just a harsh reality that you learn to accept.

I just find both the initial quote and the response kind of weird- to be honest. The initial quote I find more aggressive than loving. Maybe the commenter is saying: 'You need therapy' for that- which isn't very kind.

The initial person doesn't sound (to me) like they are even asking someone else to solve their problems though. It's more like they're having a go at whoever they are in a tumultuous relationship with. As in- just accept that I love you without any back chat.

 

[Pluto]

 

[Forever Sleep]

people send i love you texts at 3-4 am because they're planning on killing themselves and/or suicidebaiting so that someone talks them out of it

Maybe it's just me but- the quote doesn't read like that to me. More like someone in the midst of an argument with their significant other. As in- just accept that I love you and shut up about it.

 

[eggsausagerice]

More like someone in the midst of an argument with their significant other. As in- just accept that I love you and shut up about it.

"if i randomly text you" is the context clue for it being about suicide than a relationship with someone. people usually don't mind someone saying i love you, and saying "put the phone down" implies that the poster expects someone to do something about it (wellness check/talking them out of it). it's a very common thing to do for younger people to do online. it often leads to resentment.

chiikawuuuh.... save me...

 

[Forever Sleep]

"if i randomly text you" is the context clue for it being about suicide than a relationship with someone. people usually don't mind someone saying i love you, and saying "put the phone down" implies that the poster expects someone to do something about it (wellness check/talking them out of it). it's a very common thing to do for younger people to do online. it often leads to resentment.


chiikawuuuh.... save me...

I see it now. I feel really stupid interpreting it differently now!

In that context- the way that person responded was unkind. I suppose I'm still puzzled at the original though. Even now- in this context. Is it a cry for help? Is it a genuine plea that they would want to be left to suicide when the time comes? Is it a kind of warning to people to look out for messages like these?

I'm just a dinosaur I suppose! It would feel far too risky to post sonething like this- unless you wanted to draw attention and be stopped. So- I guess that's suicide baiting?

On the one hand, it's sad people have to resort to that to get a reaction. On the other though- if it's a frequent occurrence- we probably need to be looking at how much we do expect of others. I never threatened suicide as such but I know I've been too emotionally dependent on friends in the past.

 

[Jamesbond]

I just find both the initial quote and the response kind of weird- to be honest. The initial quote I find more aggressive than loving. Maybe the commenter is saying: 'You need therapy' for that- which isn't very kind.

The initial person doesn't sound (to me) like they are even asking someone else to solve their problems though. It's more like they're having a go at whoever they are in a tumultuous relationship with. As in- just accept that I love you without any back chat.

What is the ultimate objective outcome someone is hoping for. I get the whole crying for help thing. Maybe I've just lived it too long, I have become very black and white in my thinking over the years.
If you've genuinely reached the point you don't want to live anymore nobody can help you. If you don't have the tools to fix yourself it's not like you're a car that can be repaired. It's ok for me if someone calls me a fuckup or says they don't care, . It's why i don't post online on anything explaining or at least trying to explain my problems. Nobody is going to relate to them besides maybe on here.
I don't have the confidence or desire to post on a platform like TikTok saying I'm going to end my life, because it serves no purpose.
If I did I'd expect nothing from it because everyone else has thier own shit going on and I suppose platforms like that are designed to be an escape from the harsh realities of life.

 

[Apathy79]

Bit like others. No idea what the post even means. Is she saying she wants them to put the phone down? Did they do something else? Maybe the commenter knows what she means? The whole thing seems like cryptic nonsense to me but maybe I just don't get it.

 

[Forever Sleep]

What is the ultimate objective outcome someone is hoping for. I get the whole crying for help thing. Maybe I've just lived it too long, I have become very black and white in my thinking over the years.
If you've genuinely reached the point you don't want to live anymore nobody can help you. If you don't have the tools to fix yourself it's not like you're a car that can be repaired. It's ok for me if someone calls me a fuckup or says they don't care, . It's why i don't post online on anything explaining or at least trying to explain my problems. Nobody is going to relate to them besides maybe on here.
I don't have the confidence or desire to post on a platform like TikTok saying I'm going to end my life, because it serves no purpose.
If I did I'd expect nothing from it because everyone else has thier own shit going on and I suppose platforms like that are designed to be an escape from the harsh realities of life.

It comes across to me as a cry for help- to post it publicly anyway. Unless it was created as a warning to others to look out for messages like that.

I imagine both of us are older though. I remember being young and desperately hoping there was a solution or for understanding/ acknowledgment. My emotions were far stronger back then.

I tend to agree though. Other people can only help so much- I've found. I do remember a time I was so desperate for my friend to realise how badly I was struggling but then- I was struggling so much. It can become like: 'The boy who cried wolf'. They couldn't cope with that intensity and frequency of emotional turmoil. Things actually slowly got better for me when I realised it was unfair for me to expect that from them so- I do relate to what you're saying- I think.

I'd also hesitantly say that- if it was a genuine sentiment. If the person really wanted to express their love towards their family/ friends and then be left to suicide- it must be so risky to do that online where anyone can see it.

I remember in that documentary film 'The Bridge', Gene Sprague's grandmother I think it was- knew that he had been suicidal for a long time. She assured him she wouldn't stop him but asked that he would call her to say goodbye before he did it- which he did. That struck me as such a brave and loving act. But- that was different. That was private and assured.

This example does feel more like trying to bait people to care more. Which is sad- that they need to do that. But again- it does I think- ultimately depend on how much they are expecting of people. I suppose it does come down to whether it's maybe sometimes that our expectation/ dependency on others is too high. I know mine was for a time.

Personally- it made me metally/ emotionally worse too. I was upset about my problems and I was upset that my friend didn't realise that I was upset about my problems.

I think the way that person responded was pretty harsh/ cruel but then- perhaps in sentiment- to some extent- they were just speaking honestly. They shouldn't abandon a friend on the edge of suicide but then- how often does this happen? Do they post about it frequently? Are they making any effort to try to self regulate?

I also think there is only so much another person can do. Maybe to be at their beckon call constantly actually isn't doing them any favours. I tended to find, the more I leant on my friend and they helped me- the more dependent I became on them. I think the commenter could have phrased it in a kinder way though.

 

[TheTwelthRootOfTwo]

What is the ultimate objective outcome someone is hoping for. I get the whole crying for help thing. Maybe I've just lived it too long, I have become very black and white in my thinking over the years.
If you've genuinely reached the point you don't want to live anymore nobody can help you. If you don't have the tools to fix yourself it's not like you're a car that can be repaired. It's ok for me if someone calls me a fuckup or says they don't care, . It's why i don't post online on anything explaining or at least trying to explain my problems. Nobody is going to relate to them besides maybe on here.
I don't have the confidence or desire to post on a platform like TikTok saying I'm going to end my life, because it serves no purpose.
If I did I'd expect nothing from it because everyone else has thier own shit going on and I suppose platforms like that are designed to be an escape from the harsh realities of life.

Exactly. If I make up my mind to off myself, I'm certainly not going to post a video online about it

It comes across to me as a cry for help- to post it publicly anyway. Unless it was created as a warning to others to look out for messages like that.

I imagine both of us are older though. I remember being young and desperately hoping there was a solution or for understanding/ acknowledgment. My emotions were far stronger back then.

I tend to agree though. Other people can only help so much- I've found. I do remember a time I was so desperate for my friend to realise how badly I was struggling but then- I was struggling so much. It can become like: 'The boy who cried wolf'. They couldn't cope with that intensity and frequency of emotional turmoil. Things actually slowly got better for me when I realised it was unfair for me to expect that from them so- I do relate to what you're saying- I think.

I'd also hesitantly say that- if it was a genuine sentiment. If the person really wanted to express their love towards their family/ friends and then be left to suicide- it must be so risky to do that online where anyone can see it.

I remember in that documentary film 'The Bridge', Gene Sprague's grandmother I think it was- knew that he had been suicidal for a long time. She assured him she wouldn't stop him but asked that he would call her to say goodbye before he did it- which he did. That struck me as such a brave and loving act. But- that was different. That was private and assured.

This example does feel more like trying to bait people to care more. Which is sad- that they need to do that. But again- it does I think- ultimately depend on how much they are expecting of people. I suppose it does come down to whether it's maybe sometimes that our expectation/ dependency on others is too high. I know mine was for a time.

Personally- it made me metally/ emotionally worse too. I was upset about my problems and I was upset that my friend didn't realise that I was upset about my problems.

I think the way that person responded was pretty harsh/ cruel but then- perhaps in sentiment- to some extent- they were just speaking honestly. They shouldn't abandon a friend on the edge of suicide but then- how often does this happen? Do they post about it frequently? Are they making any effort to try to self regulate?

I also think there is only so much another person can do. Maybe to be at their beckon call constantly actually isn't doing them any favours. I tended to find, the more I leant on my friend and they helped me- the more dependent I became on them. I think the commenter could have phrased it in a kinder way though.

I so agree. I was like that for a long time. Expecting so much out of my friends. I also lost a few friendships because of it. Now that I'm in my 30's, I've come to realize i can't dump my stuff on other people that are also humans going through stuff. It's one thing to lean on a friend, it's another thing to rely on them as an anchor point.

 

[Jamesbond]

It comes across to me as a cry for help- to post it publicly anyway. Unless it was created as a warning to others to look out for messages like that.

I imagine both of us are older though. I remember being young and desperately hoping there was a solution or for understanding/ acknowledgment. My emotions were far stronger back then.

I tend to agree though. Other people can only help so much- I've found. I do remember a time I was so desperate for my friend to realise how badly I was struggling but then- I was struggling so much. It can become like: 'The boy who cried wolf'. They couldn't cope with that intensity and frequency of emotional turmoil. Things actually slowly got better for me when I realised it was unfair for me to expect that from them so- I do relate to what you're saying- I think.

I'd also hesitantly say that- if it was a genuine sentiment. If the person really wanted to express their love towards their family/ friends and then be left to suicide- it must be so risky to do that online where anyone can see it.

I remember in that documentary film 'The Bridge', Gene Sprague's grandmother I think it was- knew that he had been suicidal for a long time. She assured him she wouldn't stop him but asked that he would call her to say goodbye before he did it- which he did. That struck me as such a brave and loving act. But- that was different. That was private and assured.

This example does feel more like trying to bait people to care more. Which is sad- that they need to do that. But again- it does I think- ultimately depend on how much they are expecting of people. I suppose it does come down to whether it's maybe sometimes that our expectation/ dependency on others is too high. I know mine was for a time.

Personally- it made me metally/ emotionally worse too. I was upset about my problems and I was upset that my friend didn't realise that I was upset about my problems.

I think the way that person responded was pretty harsh/ cruel but then- perhaps in sentiment- to some extent- they were just speaking honestly. They shouldn't abandon a friend on the edge of suicide but then- how often does this happen? Do they post about it frequently? Are they making any effort to try to self regulate?

I also think there is only so much another person can do. Maybe to be at their beck and call constantly actually isn't doing them any favours. I tended to find, the more I leant on my friend and they helped me- the more dependent I became on them. I think the commenter could have phrased it in a kinder way though.

Yes parts of that are really relatable to me too. Of course it's sad. It's beyond sad id argue. But the person responded I'm not your friend. It's obviously on a public forum.
The saddest part and the hardest part for me isn't that someone said they don't give a shit effectively.
Even if it was your best friend you sent it to, who are they going to contact? The services that repeatedly fail you? It's just an unrealistic expectation. And it sounds to me like you understand that. I guess it sounds blunt and uncaring just to say it. But it's the reality for most people.
if the person had posted I'm starving and I've not eaten for days and someone said "fuck you starve" that would make them a bad person in my opinion.
But how do you fix someone as a social media user, you don't know when psychiatrists on hundreds of thousands a year with years of training are at a loss.
I don't think that makes you a bad person.
Maybe you could adopt the if you've got nothing good to say rule but ultimately that doesn't help either

 

[Forever Sleep]

Yes parts of that are really relatable to me too. Of course it's sad. It's beyond sad id argue. But the person responded I'm not your friend. It's obviously on a public forum.
The saddest part and the hardest part for me isn't that someone said they don't give a shit effectively.
Even if it was your best friend you sent it to, who are they going to contact? The services that repeatedly fail you? It's just an unrealistic expectation. And it sounds to me like you understand that. I guess it sounds blunt and uncaring just to say it. But it's the reality for most people.
if the person had posted I'm starving and I've not eaten for days and someone said "fuck you starve" that would make them a bad person in my opinion.
But how do you fix someone as a social media user, you don't know when psychiatrists on hundreds of thousands a year with years of training are at a loss.
I don't think that makes you a bad person.
Maybe you could adopt the if you've got nothing good to say rule but ultimately that doesn't help either

That's a depressingly fair point. Let's say the commenter said instead: 'It sounds like you are in a really bad place but- please don't do anything to hurt yourself. I'm sure you have people who love you. Can you try and reach out to them or, a helpline?'

Would that in fact have helped that person anymore? It would be the kinder response but- would it help them? It's just the sugarcoated way of making that person someone else's problem.

I doubt they were wanting to target strangers though. I imagine that was more a plea to be noticed by the people who do know them more.

Which again- is really sad but then I think the reality is- not everyone can cope with a person on the edge. So again- it's back to the dilema of- can we expect them to? Like you say- everyone has their own shit going on. How much can a person give us and, will it ever be enough?

 

[Apathy79]

It seems to me most of all you don't want to become like the person who sent the original message with cryptic expectations noone can decipher that you expect to be met. If the commenter understood what she wanted, that blows my mind on its own. I can't imagine how anyone would read anything about suicide into it without other context. If I got that from someone I barely knew, I would probably assume it was a prank.

But let's say I'm just not up with how the kids speak these days and this is obviously a cry for help in teenage culture. What is the right response? How would you respond to it? Again I don't think almost anyone knows the answer to this, much less the person you're expecting to. Does she even know what she wants or is it just not whatever they do?

 

[HopelessScientist]

View attachment 197561

Of course I ended up seeing this while I was already feeling hopeless and wanting to die.

I swear… if you're anything like this commenter, just don't speak, ever. Those of us normal people left in the world will thank you.

This commenter is actually the worst type of person and it seems like everyone these days thinks and acts just like them. They try to justify their selfish actions too by calling them "boundaries"—no, you're just borderline evil.

And the worst part is… suffering will most likely never catch up to them. They'll just continue to live their happy lives while being rewarded by society for having no empathy whatsoever.

I think I gave them too much credit and assumed it meant "yeah, I respect your choice because I am your friend, and I am not bound by mandatory reporting"

It's like my best friend told me once something along the lines of "as a doctor, I want to prevent suicide, but as a person / your friend I feel the same way as you"

Also, my psychiatrist friend, once I told her something that concerned her, she said "you can't die, I love you", which was just her own clumsy feelings. She wasn't judgemental, or angry I opened up to her. No therapist friend of mine ever turned down my inner emotions either, because it was reciprocal. They understand better than anyone the need to be heard and understood and listened to. It isn't therapy, it's called friendship. We try to get each other help, but also listen to the actual person we claim is our friend. That's what a true friend is.

 

[Jamesbond]

That's a depressingly fair point. Let's say the commenter said instead: 'It sounds like you are in a really bad place but- please don't do anything to hurt yourself. I'm sure you have people who love you. Can you try and reach out to them or, a helpline?'

Would that in fact have helped that person anymore? It would be the kinder response but- would it help them? It's just the sugarcoated way of making that person someone else's problem.

I doubt they were wanting to target strangers though. I imagine that was more a plea to be noticed by the people who do know them more.

Which again- is really sad but then I think the reality is- not everyone can cope with a person on the edge. So again- it's back to the dilema of- can we expect them to? Like you say- everyone has their own shit going on. How much can a person give us and, will it ever be enougyou've hit the nail on the head.

That's pretty much it
Flip it and if that person had said I'll help you and he failed to help them, would someone be on here slating them saying well he promised he'd do this and that and it didn't help. If someone killed themselves he'd probably be on charges or something crazy for offering someone false hope or failing someone who couldn't help themselves. My problems are not my fault but they aren't the responsibility or fault of strangers. It is what it is

 

[Apathy79]

I just sent the pic to my whatsapp group to ask what they reckon it means and one of the girls said:

She's just trying to be cute. She wants you to smile and move on. Tmist is doing that but in a cynical way that is less fun. Don't be like Tmist.

Edited to add: Another guy in the group thinks Tmist is just playing along by teasing her.

 

[LoafofBread]

Are you expecting sympathy by posting things that would call for that response, or are you hoping they will have a magic wand and magic things better for you? What makes them a bad person in your eyes?

I think if someone is showing signs that they are planning to kill themselves a good friend would at-least express that they care.

Feeling like nobody gives a shit is a big factor that contributes to ppl feeling suicidal, at-least, that's one reason I sometimes wanna yeet myself.

 

[NoPoint2Life]

Maybe it's just me but- the quote doesn't read like that to me. More like someone in the midst of an argument with their significant other. As in- just accept that I love you and shut up about it.

I have to say I completely agree with your take on this. I didn't get it either and was relieved when I saw you did not. Maybe it's our age! Because I did not realize that was a "thing" people do.

 

[Jamesbond]

I think if someone is showing signs that they are planning to kill themselves a good friend would at-least express that they care.

Feeling like nobody gives a shit is a big factor that contributes to ppl feeling suicidal, at-least, that's one reason I sometimes wanna yeet myself.

I agree but posting it on a public forum isn't telling your friend you're struggling.

I think if someone is showing signs that they are planning to kill themselves a good friend would at-least express that they care.

Feeling like nobody gives a shit is a big factor that contributes to ppl feeling suicidal, at-least, that's one reason I sometimes wanna yeet myself.

I agree this is on a public platform and a stranger is saying I'm not your friend or therapist. Does that make them a bad person. Even if you said it to your best mate, how many times would you expect them to tolerate it

 

[Forever Sleep]

I have to say I completely agree with your take on this. I didn't get it either and was relieved when I saw you did not. Maybe it's our age! Because I did not realize that was a "thing" people do.

I think it probably is partly our age. Maybe lives lived slightly less on social media.

I imagine people do leave messages behind to tell people they love them one last time. To warn people ahead of time though- I imagine is rarer. I don't know how common it is for people to threaten suicide too. But, I guess they have to do it more cryptically.

 

[LoafofBread]

I agree but posting it on a public forum isn't telling your friend you're struggling.

I agree this is on a public platform and a stranger is saying I'm not your friend or therapist. Does that make them a bad person. Even if you said it to your best mate, how many times would you expect them to tolerate it

I think that we are interpreting the commenter differently. I thought that they meant that if their friend randomly texted "i love you" they literally wouldn't do anything even if they suspected suicide.