Venting You think it's better to be bullied or ignored?

[LuzurPhagget]

Call me crazy, but I think I would actually prefer being bullied/picked on! (Though, MAYBE not to the degree of having pig's blood dumped on me etc). But seriously, being ignored SUCKS! Fuck, just looking at my life, most people more than not aren't responding to me. Wtf. I really don't know what the hell it is. And people who I THINK wouldn't flake on me/not respond to me aren't responding to me. Fuck. It's so frustrating. Feels like I'm cursed. What's the point of this life if you're incapable of making connections and people don't want you around and you yourself generally DON'T enjoy life and your depressive/anxious periods (when you fall into them) are debilitating to the point of making normal, everyday functioning nearly impossible? Fuck. Why am I still here again?!?

I really don't know what it is. I try MY best to respond to people. Even people that kinda get on my nerves sometimes, I would politely respond to. But damn, I'm just not worth it to other people. Even if I try to rationalize it, like "Oh, maybe they just forgot," "Or they just forgot to send their message," Oh, they're busy," on some level, whether they realize it or not, they deemed me not important enough to get back to. They would have checked their messages to see if I responded, nulling out the idea of thinking they already responded, or they would have immediately just responded to eliminate the chance of forgetting later on. But nope! Jesus, I think I've struck out enough times in life to realize that people simply DESPISE me on some weird, sub-atomic, quantum, mystical fucking level. Christ almighty. And even if they ALL had valid rational excuses, why the fuck does life have to orchestrate itself like THAT to make ME feel this way? Honestly, I feel at this point in my life, if I were lying by the side of the road semi-conscious, slowly bleeding to death and all it took was somebody to acknowledge me and call 911, I feel EVERYBODY in my life wouldn't even bother and just walk on by. Just let me bleed out and die.

With bullying/being picked on, as fucked up as it sounds, at least you're being acknowledged. Bullies are insecure, petty LOSERS who need to push someone down to pull themselves up. They are just THAT petty. But in a way, it's a little flattering. You must mean SOMETHING to them if they feel the need to make you feel like shit to make themselves feel better. You are just THAT MUCH of an objective to them. And hell, maybe they're bullying you because they have a secret hard-on for you! That's doubly flattering! And who knows, maybe if you were to somehow work things out with your bully, you would somehow become the best of friends later down the road! But nope. Not for me. Alas, nobody even WANTS to fight me T_T

 

[MartyByrde]

I think they can be one in the same. They hurt just as badly too. Being ignored hurts even worse for me because it's family I need now more than anything. I might as well not exist to them.

 

[Darkmoon Queen]

Call me crazy, but I think I would actually prefer being bullied/picked on! (Though, MAYBE not to the degree of having pig's blood dumped on me etc). But seriously, being ignored SUCKS! Fuck, just looking at my life, most people more than not aren't responding to me. Wtf. I really don't know what the hell it is. And people who I THINK wouldn't flake on me/not respond to me aren't responding to me. Fuck. It's so frustrating. Feels like I'm cursed. What's the point of this life if you're incapable of making connections and people don't want you around and you yourself generally DON'T enjoy life and your depressive/anxious periods (when you fall into them) are debilitating to the point of making normal, everyday functioning nearly impossible? Fuck. Why am I still here again?!?

I really don't know what it is. I try MY best to respond to people. Even people that kinda get on my nerves sometimes, I would politely respond to. But damn, I'm just not worth it to other people. Even if I try to rationalize it, like "Oh, maybe they just forgot," "Or they just forgot to send their message," Oh, they're busy," on some level, whether they realize it or not, they deemed me not important enough to get back to. They would have checked their messages to see if I responded, nulling out the idea of thinking they already responded, or they would have immediately just responded to eliminate the chance of forgetting later on. But nope! Jesus, I think I've struck out enough times in life to realize that people simply DESPISE me on some weird, sub-atomic, quantum, mystical fucking level. Christ almighty. And even if they ALL had valid rational excuses, why the fuck does life have to orchestrate itself like THAT to make ME feel this way? Honestly, I feel at this point in my life, if I were lying by the side of the road semi-conscious, slowly bleeding to death and all it took was somebody to acknowledge me and call 911, I feel EVERYBODY in my life wouldn't even bother and just walk on by. Just let me bleed out and die.

With bullying/being picked on, as fucked up as it sounds, at least you're being acknowledged. Bullies are insecure, petty LOSERS who need to push someone down to pull themselves up. They are just THAT petty. But in a way, it's a little flattering. You must mean SOMETHING to them if they feel the need to make you feel like shit to make themselves feel better. You are just THAT MUCH of an objective to them. And hell, maybe they're bullying you because they have a secret hard-on for you! That's doubly flattering! And who knows, maybe if you were to somehow work things out with your bully, you would somehow become the best of friends later down the road! But nope. Not for me. Alas, nobody even WANTS to fight me T_T

I think being ignored can be classed as a sort of bullying. It's still a tactic to get you to stay quiet and not say uncomfortable truths that are damaging to the bully's narrative. Not all bullying shouts and hits. It's still a person choosing your suffering to ensure their comfort.

I feel this post though. I never feel more lonely than when I'm in a room of people, trying to be normal. :/

 

[LuzurPhagget]

Haha, it's funny you should mention family. I should actually add that I'm not COMPLETELY ignored; I get enough attention from my insane, difficult mother! Oh lord why do Ye mock me?!? The same crazy nut who told me to jump off a bridge and kill myself and even at one point threatened to kill me with a knife and made me involuntarily lose control of my bladder. That nut. The very people I DON'T want in my life PRY themselves into it, but I can't seem to get anybody else in. So fucked up.

 

[Darkmoon Queen]

Haha, it's funny you should mention family. I should actually add that I'm not COMPLETELY ignored; I get enough attention from my insane, difficult mother! Oh lord why do Ye mock me?!? The same crazy nut who told me to jump off a bridge and kill myself and even at one point threatened to kill me with a knife and made me involuntarily lose control of my bladder. That nut. The very people I DON'T want in my life PRY themselves into it, but I can't seem to get anybody else in. So fucked up.

I wonder how many of us wouldn't be here if not for insane parents...

 

[LuzurPhagget]

I think being ignored can be classed as a sort of bullying. It's still a tactic to get you to stay quiet and not say uncomfortable truths that are damaging to the bully's narrative. Not all bullying shouts and hits. It's still a person choosing your suffering to ensure their comfort.

I feel this post though. I never feel more lonely than when I'm in a room of people, trying to be normal. :/

Yeah, that's true. The "exclusion" principle; deliberately excluding you. But still, I feel like that would still entail taking effort/energy to go out of one's way to avoid you; it's kind of inconvenient for the bully. I just feel like most people in my life don't give a FUCK about me lol. I could really use some fucks lol.

And yeah, that's funny. So I guess most of the time I try to keep to myself. Not because I think I'm "better than everyone else," but because I simply don't feel comfortable being around people I don't fit in with. But yeah, some people take it as some kind of offence, like "Oh, why don't you want to hang out with us? I mean, even though we wouldn't LET you be one of us, we still WANT you to try to want to be one of us." Pfft, ridiculous.

I wonder how many of us wouldn't be here if not for insane parents...

Like here on this site, or just existing in general? lol. I wish they stopped with my sister and never had me. Nothing good to inherit from them. Some people just SHOULDN'T have children. It's not a goddamn right. So much needless suffering/struggling.

 

[Darkmoon Queen]

Yeah, that's true. The "exclusion" principle; deliberately excluding you. But still, I feel like that would still entail taking effort/energy to go out of one's way to avoid you; it's kind of inconvenient for the bully. I just feel like most people in my life don't give a FUCK about me lol. I could really use some fucks lol.

And yeah, that's funny. So I guess most of the time I try to keep to myself. Not because I think I'm "better than everyone else," but because I simply don't feel comfortable being around people I don't fit in with. But yeah, some people take it as some kind of offence, like "Oh, why don't you want to hang out with us? I mean, even though we wouldn't LET you be one of us, we still WANT you to try to want to be one of us." Pfft, ridiculous.


Like here on this site, or just existing in general? lol. I wish they stopped with my sister and never had me. Nothing good to inherit from them. Some people just SHOULDN'T have children. It's not a goddamn right. So much needless suffering/struggling.

I think it can be both. A concerted effort to avoid you or simply forgetting you. I think over time I've just sort of conflated the two because they're both crap. >.>

I don't fit in with most people and most people in my age group are downright hostile towards me. Older folks and kids think I'm great though, it's weird.

Here on this site. :P I think feeling this way is hardwired in childhood for a lot of us.

 

[muffin222]

Ignored. I was bullied for years in school until I put an end to it by hiding in the library or restroom everyday during recess and break times. It was a relief to finally fade into obscurity and be left alone.

 

[LuzurPhagget]

I think it can be both. A concerted effort to avoid you or simply forgetting you. I think over time I've just sort of conflated the two because they're both crap. >.>

I don't fit in with most people and most people in my age group are downright hostile towards me. Older folks and kids think I'm great though, it's weird.

Here on this site. :P I think feeling this way is hardwired in childhood for a lot of us.

It really does feel supernatural though. I feel like I'M nicer and more positive than most of the people I'm around and yet, here I am. I really do think it's something supernatural lol.

That's cool. Maybe you found your niche then?

Yeah, lousy traumatic childhood!

Ignored. I was bullied for years in school until I put an end to it by hiding in the library or restroom everyday during recess and break times. It was a relief to finally fade into obscurity and be left alone.

Aw, sorry to hear. If it makes it ANY better, those people sound like they were FUCKING LOSERS. Seriously, they had no lives.

 

[lostangel]

Interesting points, honestly both are equally horrible. I'm on both sides of that argument. I have been bullied and ignored. I can't choose one or the other. I will rather be dead.

 

[Darkmoon Queen]

It really does feel supernatural though. I feel like I'M nicer and more positive than most of the people I'm around and yet, here I am. I really do think it's something supernatural lol.

That's cool. Maybe you found your niche then?

Yeah, lousy traumatic childhood!

I've never attributed it to anything supernatural, I just think people are arseholes.

My niche being kids and older folks feel like your parent buying you a Valentine's Day card so you won't feel left out though. >.>

 

[waived]

It's only acceptable to live the fullest expression of your life as possible.

 

[LuzurPhagget]

It's only acceptable to live the fullest expression of your life as possible.

AND you gotta keep that shit REAL, holmie!

 

[Notabadguy]

Ignored

 

[Feline lover]

Depending on which type of bullying. Verbally can actually be better than being ignored. At least you know that it is most likely that you can overcome it. Being ignored, is horrible. You are there but at the same time you aren't. You acknowledge your lack of importance when you're ignored.

If we are talking about physical bullying, I think I prefer being ignored. Even though being ignored is horrible as I already said, I believe that it would mess me up more being physically abused since it can develop into different complications or so.
Idk, you should see if the bullying you receive is actually better from being ignored. It all depends on the situation.

 

[262653]

With bullying/being picked on, as fucked up as it sounds, at least you're being acknowledged. Bullies are insecure, petty LOSERS who need to push someone down to pull themselves up. They are just THAT petty. But in a way, it's a little flattering. You must mean SOMETHING to them if they feel the need to make you feel like shit to make themselves feel better. You are just THAT MUCH of an objective to them. And hell, maybe they're bullying you because they have a secret hard-on for you! That's doubly flattering! And who knows, maybe if you were to somehow work things out with your bully, you would somehow become the best of friends later down the road! But nope. Not for me. Alas, nobody even WANTS to fight me T_T

Very flattering indeed :)

I like your way of expression, and your sense of humor. How come I never noticed you before?

As for the question... both options currently sound appealing to me. But I think I'd prefer bullying because it promotes strong unpleasant emotions, which in turn promote change, and I could use some fucking change. Ignore would leave me where I am as of now, and there are better places to be.

 

[Myforevercharlie]

Ignored. I was bullied for years in school until I put an end to it by hiding in the library or restroom everyday during recess and break times. It was a relief to finally fade into obscurity and be left alone.

My story is exactly the same. Unfortunately...
But im to outgoing, being ignored is not always an option. Easy to fix you should say. But i simply refuse to let others live my life. I am me, always, don't like it? Not my problem anymore.

 

[Justhere]

I'm going to assume you mean both of them at their most terrible and extreme.

They are both as bad. But if I had to choose, I'd rather be ignored

 

[Mr2005]

I'd rather be ignored since I just want people to leave me the fuck alone but if they bully you it shows you're occupying their thoughts for some reason I suppose

 

[LuzurPhagget]

Depending on which type of bullying. Verbally can actually be better than being ignored. At least you know that it is most likely that you can overcome it. Being ignored, is horrible. You are there but at the same time you aren't. You acknowledge your lack of importance when you're ignored.

If we are talking about physical bullying, I think I prefer being ignored. Even though being ignored is horrible as I already said, I believe that it would mess me up more being physically abused since it can develop into different complications or so.
Idk, you should see if the bullying you receive is actually better from being ignored. It all depends on the situation.

I don't know, maybe I'm just talking crazy here, but I don't think I would have minded getting into a fight at one point in my life; how much can you know about yourself if you've never been in a fight? I mean, not to the death of course, but just to the point of standing your ground and not taking their shit. Bullies are a superstitious and cowardly (or is that just criminals??) and my understanding is they would generally back off when they find out you're not easy pickings. Again, I'm probably talking out of my ass and wouldn't want to be bullied to like the Carrie-extreme. But still, I've never been in a fight (except grade school play fighting) and that could've been an interesting experience. Throwing down etc.

Very flattering indeed :)

I like your way of expression, and your sense of humor. How come I never noticed you before?

As for the question... both options currently sound appealing to me. But I think I'd prefer bullying because it promotes strong unpleasant emotions, which in turn promote change, and I could use some fucking change. Ignore would leave me where I am as of now, and there are better places to be.

I think I noticed you! Such a cool name! Reminds me of Balrog or some kind of mythical creature :) And 'z's are GROSSLY underused in the English language!

And thanks for the input!

I'd rather be ignored since I just want people to leave me the fuck alone but if they bully you it shows you're occupying their thoughts for some reason I suppose

Right?!? Flattering, to say the least!
And ugh. 2 days ago I sent out an e-mail to my last manager about possibly being a reference to me for the future and she hasn't responded. Fuck. I'll admit, I was going through probably one of my worst depressive/anxious periods YET while working under her (and she should know because at one point I actually asked for a leave of absence) and she might have some trouble trying to find positive things to say about me while I was in that. But she was still very kind and compassionate and probably one of my favourite managers. But still, I'm thinking it would have been nicer if she had just politely declined...or who knows, told me to go fuck myself and die by COVID-19. Not sure at this point.

Fuck, really feels like I can't get ANYWHERE in this life.