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ecmnesia

ecmnesia

the only thing humans are equal in is death
Aug 30, 2020
766
not that I am emotional about it, no. i thought I would be, but it's actually the opposite. the words are lost to me, and there is nothing I really want to say.

i don't want to justify myself. i don't want to beg for forgiveness. it's kind of pointless to me.

but i know goodbye letters are supposed to bring comfort to those who love you. so I am trying. the best i managed tho, sounds distant. what could I possibly say? write about our memories? things i liked about them? nothing comes to my mind. i am not even sure who I'd like to address.

.... i don't even know how to flair this. guess, it's a call for help?
 
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Weary Soul

Weary Soul

Soon I will be free
Nov 13, 2019
1,155
For me, I was a sobbing wreck for the first draft.

I have been slowly modifying it, and somehow feel peaceful about it (at least tonight - just got finished tweaking it).

To those who might be hurt by it, I made sure to tell them that I love them, that I know they will be ok, and quoted the 3 c's to them - "Remember, you did not cause it, you cannot control it, and you can not cure it"

I wrote absolutely nothing to the one who caused my brain bleed and other assorted injuries. Sometimes silence speaks louder than words.

I went through a phase where I wanted to justify my decision, and I did to some extent telling those I wrote to that my condition will only get worse. But, I did not go into a great bit of detail. I focused more on what I wanted done with my estate.

Hugs to you, it was not easy trying to write that letter.
 
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ecmnesia

ecmnesia

the only thing humans are equal in is death
Aug 30, 2020
766
For me, I was a sobbing wreck for the first draft.

I have been slowly modifying it, and somehow feel peaceful about it (at least tonight - just got finished tweaking it).

To those who might be hurt by it, I made sure to tell them that I love them, that I know they will be ok, and quoted the 3 c's to them - "Remember, you did not cause it, you cannot control it, and you can not cure it"

I wrote absolutely nothing to the one who caused my brain bleed and other assorted injuries. Sometimes silence speaks louder than words.

I went through a phase where I wanted to justify my decision, and I did to some extent telling those I wrote to that my condition will only get worse. But, I did not go into a great bit of detail. I focused more on what I wanted done with my estate.

Hugs to you, it was not easy trying to write that letter.
thanks for sharing. i shall take it in my heart. really appreciate it.
 
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Peachycherry

Member
Oct 3, 2020
71
I don't think there's a 'good' way to write a goodbye letter. I would try to put myself in my family/friends/acquaintances place, and think about what they would like to know, what they should take away from your letter. First, I'd reassure them, say that it was none of their fault and they couldn't prevent it in any way. This was a 100% thought out act that was carefully planned, I knew what I was doing. I wasn't influenced by anyone, it was a decision that I made myself, and it was the best possible option for me. I would maybe name my reasons for ctb, since people who are going through grief are often looking for the reasons their loved ones have died, maybe this could reassure them. You can address people directly. For example, if there's someone you cared about, tell them you'll miss them, that you didn't mean to make them suffer, etc. But if on the opposite, there's someone who you hated, you can voice that hate so they know your feelings towards them and don't get any ideas (I know there's people who make someone's death all about them...). Finally, I wouldn't recommend writing anything you wouldn't tell now, like big secrets, since if you fail your ctb (I really don't wish you that!) it'll blow up in your face. Best to take those secrets with you in the grave.
I hope I could inspire you somehow. Though if I can add... what do you mean by "it's a call for help" ?
 
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ecmnesia

ecmnesia

the only thing humans are equal in is death
Aug 30, 2020
766
I don't think there's a 'good' way to write a goodbye letter. I would try to put myself in my family/friends/acquaintances place, and think about what they would like to know, what they should take away from your letter. First, I'd reassure them, say that it was none of their fault and they couldn't prevent it in any way. This was a 100% thought out act that was carefully planned, I knew what I was doing. I wasn't influenced by anyone, it was a decision that I made myself, and it was the best possible option for me. I would maybe name my reasons for ctb, since people who are going through grief are often looking for the reasons their loved ones have died, maybe this could reassure them. You can address people directly. For example, if there's someone you cared about, tell them you'll miss them, that you didn't mean to make them suffer, etc. But if on the opposite, there's someone who you hated, you can voice that hate so they know your feelings towards them and don't get any ideas (I know there's people who make someone's death all about them...). Finally, I wouldn't recommend writing anything you wouldn't tell now, like big secrets, since if you fail your ctb (I really don't wish you that!) it'll blow up in your face. Best to take those secrets with you in the grave.
I hope I could inspire you somehow. Though if I can add... what do you mean by "it's a call for help" ?
thanks so much for your advices, they are really helpfull. I think that if start by adding the points you mentioned I might be able to carry on with the letter in a natural personal way. maybe I picked a bad to start writting, since I am kind of apathetic today, but i don't want to leave it for the last moments as I was inicially gonna do. I don't intent to mention those I hate, tho, to be honest I don't feel like they are worthy of being mention in such an intimate note. now more than ever, I am pretty sure that exposing my secrets it's not a good thing, not only if i come to fail, but also because, since I won't be here anymore, I don't want people to dwell on what has been.

oh, about this, I only meant that I wanted suggestions. maybe I made it sound like something else, my bad.

once again, thanks so much, I'll surely remember it.
 
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