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SofterSoftest

SofterSoftest

Student
Dec 30, 2021
186
Writing notes is so hard. So, so hard. I just have no way of letting my partner and family know that it really had nothing to do with them and feel totally confident/assured that they will believe my words. My hardest letter is the one I'm writing to my grandmother, who is in her 90s... on top of doing my best to be as honest, sincere, and loving as I can be with her, I also have to find the words in my mother tongue, which is a language that I only know how to write at a 3rd grade level. I wish we lived in a world where I could just talk to my family about CTB and have them gradually come around and maybe even support me with the planning, rather than them learning randomly that I have CTB. I know this would cause them profound grief anyway, but at least I'd have the opportunity to walk/support them through the grief and have these necessary heart-wrenching conversations live before just disappearing one day.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
44,979
Your feelings are understandable. I also wish that we lived in a world where suicide is not so stigmatised and our right to die is respected. I think it would help those left behind if they knew about it in advance and they are able to have time to come to terms with the persons decision. I wish you the best in whatever happens.
 
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houseofleaves

houseofleaves

and this with thee remains.
Jan 14, 2022
554
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CommitSudoku

never interfere with a lifespan reaping
Feb 12, 2022
524
I really agree with this, I wish it was possible to be more open with our thoughts and help others with grief before anything happens. That would take a lot of the burden off. I've gotten to a point where I'm not sure I can even write a proper note anymore or if I will even if I secure a more reliable method so I think it does show strength you're going through with writing them and trying to get it done well. Best wishes with writing them and whatever you decide to do.
 
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lyles

lyles

Student
Oct 13, 2021
142
I feel exactly what you are going through. I have revised and edited my note for months now. I don't know if there is any way to make it easier. You give what you can and it will ultimately be their role to take that and find their own way in life without you. It is hard for them, it is hard for you, there is nothing easy involved. But regardless of anything, I hope you are able to find some peace. If you feel there are ways to talk about your feelings with them, I would encourage it. Otherwise, know my best wishes are with you.
 
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