Would you like to be murdered?

[salviap]

This post is not a threat, I promise!
Suicidal people may yearn for death, but how would you feel if someone killed you?
Personally, compared to continuing to live, I would prefer being shot in the head, pushed off a cliff, hanged, or strangled, but I wouldn't want to be stabbed.

Certainly. I'd hire a hitman for myself if I could.

 

[bed]

no, i doubt it'd be quick or pleasant and you'd be filled with immense fear until you pass out or die. you could also be potentially tortured in the process as well.

now if it was just a random gunshot to the head with no prior knowledge of it happening, sure. you'd just die instantly and never even know.

 

[StoneCactus]

Depends on how they'd kill me. Blow my head off with a gun? Absolutely. Stabbed, strangled, pushed info the path of a car or train? Absolutely not.

 

[Dies Ultima]

"I don't seem to have the chance, but I'd like to die in war."

 

[FoolsExpedition]

at this point in my life, gladly. i would just want the person to know what they're doing so my death is guranteed, i don't care if it hurts a lot at this point just as long as they can finish the job

 

[astaroth81]

No. That means someone takes my energy. Absolutely not. I'm the master of my destiny. I will kill someone to defend my life. My life is MINE to take. And MINE alone.

This reminds me of the Aurora Colorado Batman movie theater mass shooting committed by James Holmes who was 24 years old at the time.

James killed 12 people and injured 70 on July 20, 2012. In a midnight viewing of the Dark Knight Rises, James exited out a side door he had left propped open 20 minutes into the movie.

He returned and lobbed tear gas into the theater and opened fire on the crowd with a shotgun, AR-15 and .40 caliber handgun.

His rifle eventually jammed causing him to walk out and surrender. Cops were able to vacate his apartment building because he left his room rigged with explosives. Otherwise there might have been more deaths.

2 years later, 22 hours of interview footage were played during his trial. In it, James described his reasoning behind the attack.

James said that every person has their own stored "value" or "capital" and that by killing people he would be able to take it and add it to his own.

He described the event as being purely transactional and the more purpose a person has, the more stored value points killing them would transfer to himself.

Very similar sounding to what you said about them taking your energy.

lethal injection like the death row prisoner, how come they have an easier death.

Do you know what happens with lethal injection most of the time? It's really not so pleasant and definitely not painless.

Lethal injection is meant to look painless. It's a 3 drug protocol. The first, said to be an anesthetic, is actually just a seductive. Meaning the person remains fully conscious of pain.

The second stops all voluntary muscle movement. The person can no longer breathe, scream or show signs of distress.

The third is referred to as liquid fire because it causes an intense, burning as it travels through the veins.

84% of person's studied out of 200 executed by lethal injection were found to have pulmonary edema prevalent. The lungs of executed inmates are often found to weigh twice as much as normal.

Froth and foam are commonly found in the lungs and airways.

So basically you lay there paralyzed, fully conscious of pain but can't move, scream or breathe, you're injected with liquid fire which burns you from inside out as you drown to death on your on blood and bodily fluids.

Not easy by any means.

 

[ScaredPossum]

Oh gosh no. That's too scary for me

 

[FrustratedMTFtrans]

Certainly. I'd hire a hitman for myself if I could.

I found a hit woman on a messenging site. She was using a silenced gun for discretion, cleaning up and arranging body disposal. We chatted for a while and I learnt that she only did it in the US, not wanting to travel abroad with a weapon and trying to source one locally. I told her I would like her to shoot me in my navel and/or the hole in which I am fucked as a MTF transgirl, and as such I loved the idea of getting myself killed by a woman. I would be dressed and made up specially, which she should understand, so I wouldn't want to be shot in the head or face, I'm too vain for that and it would be unacceptably instantaneous. I told her that if she uses a silenced revolver, she could pull the trigger on some empty chambers first, and she would be welcome to shoot me repeatedly if I die too slowly. Then she went quiet and I never heard from her again. I will never forget our brief chats.

I recently found two killers on motherless.com, but despite one reacting initially, they both rejected me. I had been hoping to repeat the experience of 32-year old Sonia Exelby, who hooked up with a man on that website and flew the Atlantic in October 2025 to be abused, tortured and killed by him at her request, in an Airbnb, confirming to him that she wanted to be killed by him stabbing her. He stabbed her 4 times and buried her body nearby.

On May 7, 2026, Dutch authorities were said to have closed down motherless.com, but I found a motherless statement that it was voluntary and they would be back soon. So there is still hope and it's important, as I have been talking with some MTF transgirls there about doing CTB together, by suicide, or preferably, as it's a complete solution, by finding someone to kill us with disposal included. I can't bear being cut off from those transgirls: we will have to set up additional communication links in case motherless goes down again.

 

[FrustratedMTFtrans]

I would like it to happen to me, by strangulation but preferably being shot or stabbed in the navel. It coukd be a hit contract on myself, I imagine. I doubt there is anyone here on SaSu who can take on the task. I was looking for people doing such things on the motherless.com website, but it got closed down on May 7, 2026. Both there and elsewhere I've been talking with several MTF transgirls about getting it done together, but I've lost some of those contacts with the demise of motherless. Also discussed have been ideas of CTB pacts where transgirls do it to each other following suicidal overdosing together. I think the navel is suitable not only for being shot, but also for being stabbed. It's a weak point in the body and although some force and pain is to be expected with resistance of the skin being penetrated, it should feel OK thereafter, the pain alleviated by a high adrenaline level due to the excitement of what is happening..

Update. Motherless.com says it closed voluntarily and will be back soon.

 

[monsoon13]

the idea is scary but yes, only if someone seriously wanted to kill me and would gain something from it. it depends on the method also, i dont like suffering but i guess it wouldnt matter at that point

 

[salviap]

Update. Motherless.com says it closed voluntarily and will be back soon.

i'll have to check this out.
I wonder how much this would cost.
I wonder how much this would cost.

 

[lonergirl_26]

Honestly this is a death I have fantasised about. I like the fact that my mum wouldn't blame herself and that I would generally be liked because of what happened.

 

[lalaloopsie]

I keep thinking about it, imagining it happening one night, just me and that other person, and me being pushed back and getting stabbed.

 

[hyacinths]

Yes, honestly this would be my preferred way to go.

 

[rainatthebusstop]

Certainly. I'd hire a hitman for myself if I could.

Hah if only that wasn't a pipe dream. I think I have roughly enough to hire a hitman but alas most you find online are honey pots. Which is a shame. There should be online forums matching up people who want to kill with those who want to be killed.

Now my only hope is doing it myself (because let's be real, no one is merciful enough to do it) or running into someone with murderous intent and the will to pull through.

 

[Bismillah6925]

It would literally be a dream come true. I could finally be free and not be guilty about it.

Getting shot point blank walking out of a Confessional is my preferred way to go.

 

[softfur]

I found a hit woman on a messenging site. She was using a silenced gun for discretion, cleaning up and arranging body disposal. We chatted for a while and I learnt that she only did it in the US, not wanting to travel abroad with a weapon and trying to source one locally. I told her I would like her to shoot me in my navel and/or the hole in which I am fucked as a MTF transgirl, and as such I loved the idea of getting myself killed by a woman. I would be dressed and made up specially, which she should understand, so I wouldn't want to be shot in the head or face, I'm too vain for that and it would be unacceptably instantaneous. I told her that if she uses a silenced revolver, she could pull the trigger on some empty chambers first, and she would be welcome to shoot me repeatedly if I die too slowly. Then she went quiet and I never heard from her again. I will never forget our brief chats.

I recently found two killers on motherless.com, but despite one reacting initially, they both rejected me. I had been hoping to repeat the experience of 32-year old Sonia Exelby, who hooked up with a man on that website and flew the Atlantic in October 2025 to be abused, tortured and killed by him at her request, in an Airbnb, confirming to him that she wanted to be killed by him stabbing her. He stabbed her 4 times and buried her body nearby.

On May 7, 2026, Dutch authorities were said to have closed down motherless.com, but I found a motherless statement that it was voluntary and they would be back soon. So there is still hope and it's important, as I have been talking with some MTF transgirls there about doing CTB together, by suicide, or preferably, as it's a complete solution, by finding someone to kill us with disposal included. I can't bear being cut off from those transgirls: we will have to set up additional communication links in case motherless goes down again.

that's so fascinating it's like some low budget silly horror movies i've watched... gl finding whatever you're looking for

 

[nosense-user]

No, my life is my own and only i have the right to take it

 

[gameovergirlie]

Used to obsess over this idea. Unfortunately that path almost always leads down a worse path

 

[E4syW3y0u7]

Would make it easier, clean shot in the head, lights out in an instant, Sopranos ending style.

But that would take away the only meaningful act in my life that i can have total control on so probably not for the time being.

 

[Bishop]

I thought the post said "who would you like to be murdered?" Well

 

[Idrktbh]

Yeah!! I've been fixated on it for a while and I do want it, a lot even! especially after failing to strangle myself and all in December. It'd be way better than living and failing to do it myself, if it were to be just getting shot in the head, strangulation, getting pushed off a high enough drop etc etc but yeah I wouldn't wanna be stabbed or drowned or anything like that, sometimes my mind slips up and I think bleeding out from a deep cuts/stabs isn't too bad either but of course it definitely isn't a top favorite nor is it something I constantly want unlike the other options, It would definitely be much better if it's someone I trust and/or someone who purposefully wanted to help me out. I've been really into the idea overall after I myself failed.

 

[Enyan]

I wouldn't wanna be murdered in a way that is slow and torturous, but if it were relatively quick (being stabbed or shot)? Then yes! Especially because I've wanted to be "noticed" all my life since I've always been a loner and outsider, and if someone were to murder me, I'd maybe become part of a documentary TV show or something.

 

[cipher]

someone else killing me would spare me the trouble of having to do it myself, i see no downsides here

 

[deathisapanacea]

No, they might botch it---In Germany, with the Russian Troops advancing at the end of the war, thousands of Germans committed suicide--Many killed their families and then themselves--But this one guy, after killing his family, then shot himself, but he only succeeded in blinding himself

Most nighmareish scenario

 

[Alexandra_]

Yes. If another person agreed to kill me, then I would agree to any death

 

[FrustratedMTFtrans]

It's quite common for MTF transgirl prostitutes to be killed when plying their trade in back streets and elsewhere in Latin American countries, especially in Brazil. A transgirl girlfriend of mine suggested going there and doing it together, in anticipation and hope of being killed already on the first night out as prostitutes. But she changed her mind and I don't want to do it without her.

 

[marilosingit]

i've written a whole fantasy paragraph about my ex/abuser finally doing the most and choking me out until i can't breathe anymore.

 

[FrustratedMTFtrans]

If someone kills me, strangulation would be acceptable, but hanging preferred. Navel and/or rectum stabbing or shooting also OK for mainly internal bleeding keeping things relatively clean, but not on other body parts, as it's messy, in the head absolutely not, as I want to look pretty afterwards. Ideally, I would want to be given a choice, but I may just have to accept what is done.

Hm. As a concept, I wouldn't mind it I suppose. But realistically? No, probably not. They could torture me before death, make me slowly bleed out, etc. I'd only accept if I knew it would be quick and painless, otherwise no point in involving someone else in it.
Now, if it would be a double suicide in a way we kill each other not ourselves, now we're talking....

I am talking with other MTF transgirls about double suicide in which we kill each other, dressed to kill and dressed to be killed. We chose navel stabbing each other as the favored method, as it's much easier to stab someone else than oneself. Once agreed, it has to be done, as there is no way one of us chickening out and leaving the other one to die alone, as that wouldn't be fair on her.

 

[Kanau_Nano]

If someone kills me, strangulation would be acceptable, but hanging preferred. Navel and/or rectum stabbing or shooting also OK for mainly internal bleeding keeping things relatively clean, but not on other body parts, as it's messy, in the head absolutely not, as I want to look pretty afterwards. Ideally, I would want to be given a choice, but I may just have to accept what is done.


I am talking with other MTF transgirls about double suicide in which we kill each other, dressed to kill and dressed to be killed. We chose navel stabbing each other as the favored method, as it's much easier to stab someone else than oneself. Once agreed, it has to be done, as there is no way one of us chickening out and leaving the other one to die alone, as that wouldn't be fair on her.

Being stabbed in the stomach sounds very painful. Would that even be enough? Once you get stabbed i think you might be in so much pain you couldn't stab the other. Sounds scary