Venting wondering if i should ctb

[synthcadia]

so um. updates in my life:
- my brother got kicked out of the house.
- a week later, my mom's cancer comes back in 4 places.
- friend stayed with me and then my parents kept bitching to me when they didn't like stuff that she did, they sided with her abusive parents, and then they pretty much made her feel like she had to leave while telling me that i needed better friends and wondering where they went wrong.
- stress from classes.

so, not only am i carrying myself, but also my mom emotionally.

it's too much LOL. i'm scared to go home, and now i'm think that i live in an emotionally abusive household.

this week… i'm physically feeling the stress. face is breaking out and this week i've been so fucking exhausted i almost passed out when i was walking to and from my car today.

i dont know if i can hold up myself and my mom. and my mom told me, almost verbatim, that my mom's health and relationship is more important than my friends.

I'm so tired. (((((((^:

 

[undecided]

You sound like you're very young. I'm guessing 15 - 17? This stage in life sucks. But you WILL get through it! Your hormones are all over the place, and your mom is ill and she's saying stuff she probably wouldn't say if she wasn't ill.
You WILL get through this. Life sucks sometimes

 

[2messdup]

You sound like you're very young. I'm guessing 15 - 17? This stage in life sucks. But you WILL get through it! Your hormones are all over the place, and your mom is ill and she's saying stuff she probably wouldn't say if she wasn't ill.
You WILL get through this. Life sucks sometimes

Can people drive at age 15-17?

 

[AuroraB]

Can people drive at age 15-17?

i got my license when i was 16 and drove myself to high school back in the late 1970s.

 

[2messdup]

so um. updates in my life:
- my brother got kicked out of the house.
- a week later, my mom's cancer comes back in 4 places.
- friend stayed with me and then my parents kept bitching to me when they didn't like stuff that she did, they sided with her abusive parents, and then they pretty much made her feel like she had to leave while telling me that i needed better friends and wondering where they went wrong.
- stress from classes.

so, not only am i carrying myself, but also my mom emotionally.

it's too much LOL. i'm scared to go home, and now i'm think that i live in an emotionally abusive household.

this week… i'm physically feeling the stress. face is breaking out and this week i've been so fucking exhausted i almost passed out when i was walking to and from my car today.

i dont know if i can hold up myself and my mom. and my mom told me, almost verbatim, that my mom's health and relationship is more important than my friends.

I'm so tired. ((((

i got my license when i was 16 and drove myself to high school back in the late 1970s.

I thought you didn't sound like a minor. I'm so very sorry that is happening to you and can empathise.its so hard when family abuse your loyalty to cross your boundaries and attack what's important to you. Cancer or not, that doesn't reduce their obligation to respect your boundaries.

 

[cryone]

hey, its okay to feel the way you do. im sorry for what you're going through, especially with a broken family. but to answer the question in your title, if you're stuck on considering CTB, don't do it.

 

[synthcadia]

You sound like you're very young. I'm guessing 15 - 17? This stage in life sucks. But you WILL get through it! Your hormones are all over the place, and your mom is ill and she's saying stuff she probably wouldn't say if she wasn't ill.
You WILL get through this. Life sucks sometimes

i am 21 my person

You sound like you're very young. I'm guessing 15 - 17? This stage in life sucks. But you WILL get through it! Your hormones are all over the place, and your mom is ill and she's saying stuff she probably wouldn't say if she wasn't ill.
You WILL get through this. Life sucks sometimes

this actually annoys me, and tbh, it's WORSE as an adult. why are u presuming my age? i think this comment got be banned from the site until i proved my age.

ngl it was better when i was younger but it's more difficult now.

again please don't presume my age.

 

[undecided]

i am 21 my person

this actually annoys me, and tbh, it's WORSE as an adult. why are u presuming my age? i think this comment got be banned from the site until i proved my age.

ngl it was better when i was younger but it's more difficult now.

again please don't presume my age.

As I thought... you're VERY young ! My comment stands. But, go ahead, if that's what you want to do!

 

[synthcadia]

As I thought... you're VERY young ! My comment stands. But, go ahead, if that's what you want to do!

i'm young but i'm not 15-17. like you GOTTA be careful throwing that around. like… i'm done with puberty, i'm not "hormonal" because of that. like that's a bit rude to say.

i'm an emotionally unstable individual and i acknowledge that. like when i saw that i was banned from sasu i almost ctbed from that fact alone.

As I thought... you're VERY young ! My comment stands. But, go ahead, if that's what you want to do!

also moderators have seen my ID so they KNOW i am of legal age.

 

[undecided]

i'm young but i'm not 15-17. like you GOTTA be careful throwing that around. like… i'm done with puberty, i'm not "hormonal" because of that. like that's a bit rude to say.

i'm an emotionally unstable individual and i acknowledge that. like when i saw that i was banned from sasu i almost ctbed from that fact alone.

also moderators have seen my ID so they KNOW i am of legal age.

You're 21 !! Ffs !!

 

[synthcadia]

You're 21 !! Ffs !!

still am not 15-17 as you claimed. not an emotional teenager.

anyway i won't be responding further to this.

 

[wayn]

Yeah I'm 21 aswell and depressed since 14 so stop saying this bullshit that it will be better, it's might for you but not for everyone

 

[synthcadia]

Yeah I'm 21 aswell and depressed since 14 so stop saying this bullshit that it will be better, it's might for you but not for everyone

yeah that's my experience as well. been depressed since 10. i try and try but it doesn't get better. always worse.

 

[Kalista]

do what you have to

in the end it's your choice, not theirs. so try not to get riled up from comments about your age and presumptions of what you're capable of when they don't know anything about your life, how it feels, and what you've been going through first hand.
they're not the ones dealing and juggling these problems, you are. they're not the ones exhausted, you are.
anyone who challenges your pain are always the ones who will oversimplify problems and only throw highly superficial advice because it's easier to say it than to actually help that person in a more practical and meaningful way.

i'm sorry all of this is happening

 

[synthcadia]

do what you have to

in the end it's your choice, not theirs. so try not to get riled up from comments about your age and presumptions of what you're capable of when they don't know anything about your life, how it feels, and what you've been going through first hand.
they're not the ones dealing and juggling these problems, you are. they're not the ones exhausted, you are.
anyone who challenges your pain are always the ones who will oversimplify problems and only throw highly superficial advice because it's easier to say it than to actually help that person in a more practical and meaningful way.

i'm sorry all of this is happening

thank you kalista. <3 u are absolutely right. honestly it triggered me so much too bc it reminds me of how my parents + so many other people in my life have diminished my issues or negated them.