Venting why is the end so appealing

[chronically_silly]

idk why I want the end so badly, I'm now burdened with the knowledge of quick and easy methods. I have a great life, I have friends and family who love me and despite my physical and mental health being very poor I'm a very fortunate individual, I still think the world would be better without me. Despite everyone loving me and the endless praise I receive from strangers I feel only I understand the truth that I am an awful corrupt individual, i will forever be burdened by my existence and the only way to destroy my anxiety, depression, addictions, is to CTB. I know deep down I don't want to die, I truly just want internal peace but I'm scared that peace will never come. if anyone has any words of comfort it would be greatly appreciated. I'm scared and alone, all I want is value.

 

[Defenestration]

This attracts me but I'm also afraid. good luck to you. we are in this situation a lot

 

[chronically_silly]

This attracts me but I'm also afraid. good luck to you. we are in this situation a lot

all I hear is that it will get better but ive been waiting so long and it hasn't, these thoughts take over my happiest days, will "we" ever be happy?

 

[Defenestration]

Tout ce que j'entends, c'est que ça ira mieux, mais j'attends depuis si longtemps et ce n'est pas le cas, ces pensées prennent le dessus sur mes jours les plus heureux, est-ce que « nous » serons un jour heureux ?

No...death IS only éternal rest