Why do I try to help people

[FriesLovee]

Hi
In my real life I receive the same old helping tips or wtv by my cousin, sister etc . I usually ignore it or I can't even take it seriously anymore because it's the same thing and it won't change my mind .
When I talk to friends I made here , if I feel like they are gonna do it , I try to help them to not ctb. I don't even know why I bother doing it because if they really wanna do it it's completely fine . Why can't I follow my own advices that I try to give people . Am I selfish for wanting them to survive ? I also don't want to come off as a dick for trying to not let them ctb?
My first reall close friend I made here ctb earlier this month and it's been really hard even if we knew eachother for like 3 weeks . At the same time it's really hard to make friends here so the one I have I really cherish it right now.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I wonder if a lot of people do this. I find a friend does this to me- comes out with a bunch of (sometimes) ridiculous platitudes that they don't follow themselves and that probably irritate them just as much. Even worse- I've found myself doing the same!

I suppose sometimes, we are caught off guard with a problem that doesn't have an easy answer, so our brains do the lazy thing and revert parrot fashion to what we've probably heard ourselves from parents, family, teachers etc.

Plus- we're hardly going to say- 'It sounds like you should just give up and kill yourself.' Sometimes maybe the best response is just to listen and try to sympathise with how they feel without trting to provide solutions. But then, we're all different. We all seem to need different responses. I had a friend who actually prefered it when people told them they were blowing things out of proportion. That would upset me more. I prefer validation.

But yeah, we're all only human too. I can't say I've exactly tried to convince people I've gotten to know better here to stay. But, I think we've both been honest in the past and said we'd really miss the other if they went. And, I do still miss them. They went a couple of years ago now.

 

[FriesLovee]

I wonder if a lot of people do this. I find a friend does this to me- comes out with a bunch of (sometimes) ridiculous platitudes that they don't follow themselves and that probably irritate them just as much. Even worse- I've found myself doing the same!

I suppose sometimes, we are caught off guard with a problem that doesn't have an easy answer, so our brains do the lazy thing and revert parrot fashion to what we've probably heard ourselves from parents, family, teachers etc.

Plus- we're hardly going to say- 'It sounds like you should just give up and kill yourself.' Sometimes maybe the best response is just to listen and try to sympathise with how they feel without trting to provide solutions. But then, we're all different. We all seem to need different responses. I had a friend who actually prefered it when people told them they were blowing things out of proportion. That would upset me more. I prefer validation.

But yeah, we're all only human too. I can't say I've exactly tried to convince people I've gotten to know better here to stay. But, I think we've both been honest in the past and said we'd really miss the other if they went. And, I do still miss them. They went a couple of years ago now.

Yup pretty much