Why do I always feel empty and disassociated?

[Sadmonster98]

Hey!
I'm constantly feeling empty and dissociated. I tend to daydream a lot as a coping mechanism. I listen to music at full volume almost blasting my ears, it helps me to disconnect with the outside world and helps me dive into my own fantasy world. Another coping mechanism is instinctive shopping. I feel almost unbearable amount of emotional pain every night. I barely sleep at night. I used to watch porn few years ago as a coping mechanism but not anymore because i'm more self aware and moral person now. I know porn fetishizes and dehumanises and promotes violence towards women. Also I don't drink or do drugs btw.
I'm so close to kms but everytime I want to do the act i imagine the pain my family and friends would go through that stops me. I feel like i'm just existing to not hurt other peoples emotions.
My question here is how you guys cope? What is some effective coping mechanism to ease my pain?

 

[Cucumberman]

To relate with you OP, my coping mechanism is to sleep. Just like daydreaming, though I have very vivid dreams all the time, it makes me feel excited to sleep. This actually sucks because I'm left with tons of tasks that I procrastinate on and worsen my condition.. I wouldn't recommend this. To somehow address this, I try my best to find and appreciate the little things around me.. I try to find a reason to laugh, to have fun even for just the moment.. I force myself to talk with others and walk around town when I feel the urge to "escape".. I don't know if these make sense but, these tiny, mediocre, but still fun moments make these days quite bearable and interesting. I hope you find the right coping mechanism for you

 

[Sadmonster98]

To relate with you OP, my coping mechanism is to sleep. Just like daydreaming, though I have very vivid dreams all the time, it makes me feel excited to sleep. This actually sucks because I'm left with tons of tasks that I procrastinate on and worsen my condition.. I wouldn't recommend this. To somehow address this, I try my best to find and appreciate the little things around me.. I try to find a reason to laugh, to have fun even for just the moment.. I force myself to talk with others and walk around town when I feel the urge to "escape".. I don't know if these make sense but, these tiny, mediocre, but still fun moments make these days quite bearable and interesting. I hope you find the right coping mechanism for you

I also tend to sleep and procrastinate a lot as as a coping mechanism. Thank you so much for interacting and suggesting some coping mechanisms. Hugs to you

 

[Beyond_Repair]

I listen to music full blast and dissociate/
fantasize as well

I mostly read and play video games though. Currently trying to bust through my reading list before my date, has actually been pretty enjoyable

 

[Sadmonster98]

I listen to music full blast and dissociate/
fantasize as well

I mostly read and play video games though. Currently trying to bust through my reading list before my date, has actually been pretty enjoyable

Thank you. I listen to music as well to dissociate from the other world. I've collected piles of books but can't even focus to read one.

 

[pulleditnearlyoff]

I can 100% relate to this. I do exactly the same. Hate to live in reality.

 

[Aglossa]

I relate to this so much. So many nights just blasting music too loud in my ears, caving in in my own bubble. Sometimes when I am outside or with other people I start daydreaming too...
If you want healthy coping mechanisms to disassociate I would suggest consuming fiction media like movies, books, comics, etc. Just avoid too depressing or triggering topics. Video games are good too, especially the ones that are really immersive worlds e.g. Minecraft. Anything interesting enough to distract you from your own thoughts. Hope you find something that works for you

 

[Sadmonster98]

I can 100% relate to this. I do exactly the same. Hate to live in reality.

It sucks man. I hope you feel better

I relate to this so much. So many nights just blasting music too loud in my ears, caving in in my own bubble. Sometimes when I am outside or with other people I start daydreaming too...
If you want healthy coping mechanisms to disassociate I would suggest consuming fiction media like movies, books, comics, etc. Just avoid too depressing or triggering topics. Video games are good too, especially the ones that are really immersive worlds e.g. Minecraft. Anything interesting enough to distract you from your own thoughts. Hope you find something that works for you

I relate to this so much. So many nights just blasting music too loud in my ears, caving in in my own bubble. Sometimes when I am outside or with other people I start daydreaming too...
If you want healthy coping mechanisms to disassociate I would suggest consuming fiction media like movies, books, comics, etc. Just avoid too depressing or triggering topics. Video games are good too, especially the ones that are really immersive worlds e.g. Minecraft. Anything interesting enough to distract you from your own thoughts. Hope you find something that works for you

Thank you for your genuine response. It feels good that I'm not alone who uses loud music and daydreaming as escape.
I seriously don't even have the attention span to consume fiction media as i'm suffering from ADHD and I don't play video games.
Thanks for your suggestions. I hope you find some better coping mechanisms too